Waning Moon
by Eviefan
Summary: Edward left Bella as he did in New Moon. He also left someone else behind. A retelling of Waning Moon Changing Tides.
1. Headaches

**Waning Moon**

**Summary: **_**Set During N.M. Edward leaves behind more than just**_

_**Bella.**_

_Authors Notes: I really want to start writing again. __**Waning Moon Changing Tides**_

_was my first attempt at that kind of plot. I have some new ideas and want to do a few things differently._

_I hope you all will like this change. I'll leave that one up as is for now. _

**Chapter 1: Headaches-Bella**

Getting to school to find out that my only class of the day had been cancelled wasn't the relief I shared with my classmates. After going back to my truck, I sat in the driver's seat not moving. It was nine in the morning. With no class and my homework done, going home to my daughter was the responsible choice. The problem was, home was the last place I wanted to be. Carlie was my life now, and I loved her with everything I was. She wasn't my reason for not wanting to go back. The argument this morning with Charlie began to trickle into my mind. As it began to replay, my eyes shut.

We never used to argue. My dad had his work, I had school. Life changed after that night, even before then. The summer before Edward left had been the best one I'd ever had in my life. There were Cullen baseball games, as well as walks to the meadow that belonged to just Edward and me. We had even gone to a few movies, though as I recall, Edward had been more interested in tracing his fingers over the back of my hand, or playing with my hair. One day we had gone to our meadow. It was one of the only times I wore a dress. A sundress that my mom and I had bought the summer before I moved to Forks. That day had been unseasonably warm. When Edward came to get me, he stood just outside the door of my house staring at me. He of course recovered quickly.

The vibrating cell phone in my jeans pocket brought my attention back to the present. I realized that I'd been sitting in my truck for twenty seven minutes. The text was from my dad, asking me to stop by the store and get some more teething gel for Carlie. Even though I wasn't looking forward to going back home, knowing my baby needed the gel gave me the courage to start the engine and head to the store.

Driving always helped to clear my head, and as I made my way to the small grocery in town, I thought about my argument with Charlie, realizing it wasn't really my dad's fault. He just worried about me. Of course Charlie wouldn't have had to worry if Jacob hadn't informed him that I'd driven to the Cullen's empty house. It wasn't like any of that hurt me. I'd gotten used to the idea that Edward had meant what he said. He was making it like he had never existed. Part of me still wanted him to come back. Carlie needed to know her father in spite of what Charlie, Mom, and most everyone else thought. Again, they wanted to protect me, and after the months of being nearly catatonic, who could blame them.

My arrival at the store was the same as always. I was met with people staring at me and whispering when they thought I didn't notice. In the baby isle I got the teething gel, standing still to mentally check off the things that Carlie may need. Before going to the front of the store, I grabbed a teething ring, even though my baby likely wouldn't use it

The cashier offered me a smile as she scanned my items. After paying for them with the cash I had, I rushed back to my truck. Being the gossip of town was getting on my every last nerve. I was happy and excited about flying down to Florida with Carlie to see Mom and Phil. We were staying there for the summer. Hopefully being away from Forks would give me time to try and figure things out. Was it selfish of me to want to live in a town where no one knew my past? The only guilty feelings I had was for Charlie. He loved being Grandpa Charlie, and Carlie loved my dad. He was really the only consistent male role model in her life.

At the house, as I walked up the stairs, the front door opened. Carlie was facing outward being supported against my dad's chest with an arm under her bottom and one around her middle. My little girl's face was wet with tears. When she saw me she smiled reaching out. Her small hands opened and closed as she leaned against my dad's arm.

"I'll trade you."

I set my book bag down before taking my daughter. Once she was in my arms, Carlie pressed her face into my shoulder. A chilly breeze blew against us so I hurried inside, heading for the family room. After sitting down on the sofa, I set my daughter on my lap so we could look at one another. "Are you having teeth issues again?

Carlie smiled as she leaned forward shifting her legs. That meant she wanted to stand on my legs. Once she was upright, Carlie smiled and began to bounce.

"You're home early."

I glanced past Carlie at my dad as he approached with the gel. "Yeah, class got cancelled right as I walked into the building. I stayed for a few minutes just to make sure I really did have everything ready for Wednesday."

Carlie's small hand pressed against my lips. When I nibbled on her palm, she laughed. "When did she eat last?"

"After you left. She ate half a banana and some Cheerios, and had one of her small sippy cups of water. Bells, I'm sorry I got so mad this morning." Charlie sat down on the couch next to us, taking my baby as she reached for him. For a moment he was distracted as she patted his lips, laughing again when he nibbled her fingers. When Carlie struggled to be let down, my dad put her on the floor. We both watched as she crawled over to her activity blanket. "I just worry, well you know how that goes now."

My eyes focused on my baby, but I did know a little about worrying for a child. "I know, dad. You don't understand why I did that. It's something that is between me and Jake."

Dad cleared his throat and I glanced at him. From the expression on his face, it was evident that not only had Jake told him that I'd gone by the Cullen's old house, but that he had also seen fit to tell Dad something of what drove me to do that. "Don't defend him, please don't."

"Bells, he just said you two kissed. I told him that was enough for me, and that you needed to work things out. its hard honey, because when Edward left you, well it was a scary time."

Carlie was chewing on some of the toys attached to the activity blanket. She wasn't yet aware that I was getting stressed out again. The one thing I felt was different about her that showed, was how sensitive she was to an emotional environment or maybe it was just me she was in tune with.

"Listen, I need to go on and head in. Call if you want to go out to eat at the diner tonight."

Finally I looked to my right. Charlie was looking at me and he offered me a smile. I reached for him and we hugged for a second before he got up. He got his things together and after giving Carlie a kiss on the head, he left us alone.

Before my baby could fuss, she was in my arms. I carried her upstairs to the room we both shared. My old room hadn't changed too much. The desk that had been in here when I moved was gone, replaced by Carlie's crib. It was two steps from the end of my bed. Next to that was my old rocking chair. There were new cushions that went with the beautiful Quilt hanging on the wall behind my daughter's crib. Sue had made both of them.

At the end of my bed I spread out the changing pad, grabbing a clean diaper and the wipes before laying my little girl down. Carlie looked up at me no longer smiling. instead she had a very serious expression on her face. Before changing her diaper, I leaned in and nibbled under her neck. My little girl laughed, smiling at me as I lifted away from her. "That is so much better." While I undid her sleeper, I continued to find different spots to nibble on in an effort to keep her happy.

Since Carlie was only wet, I was done quickly, including dressing her in a pair of jeans and a long sleeve top. It was pink with flowers printed all over the fabric. While I was putting her socks on, Carlie yawned, rubbing her eyes.

Once she was dressed, I carried her to her crib, lifting out the pink polar fleece blanket my mom had gotten for her a few days after she was born. It was Carlie's security blanket, and she never fell asleep without it.

A minute later she was nursing and her eyes were already shut. I leaned my head against the chair as I rocked letting my eyes shut.

Jacob was in love with me. He had been since before Edward left. He had been there during everything and he deserved someone who could give him all of what he wanted from me.

My daughter fussed, so I turned her around and got her to drink from the other side. As she settled, there was a tap at my window. "Come up." I whispered knowing Jake could hear me.

He slid the window open and I tried not to wish that it was Edward. After he shut the window, Jake sat down at the edge of my bed. "I'm sorry."

More than anything I wanted to yell at him and tell him to get the hell out of my room. It wasn't Carlie preventing me from doing that. "How many times are we going to do this Jake. I like you as my friend. I love you as my friend. I know that I held your hand that night at the movie. Carlie changed it all Jake.

His head lowered and he grasped his hair. "Bella, will you tell me why you feel obligated to him." When he looked at me, I started to speak, but he held up his hand. "I know. You have Carlie, and she's his daughter. I get that. But if you didn't have her, if you just had yourself to think of, what then?"

The baby in my arms had changed my life. As I looked down at her while she continued nursing, I knew that was my answer. "Jake. She is here, and yes maybe if I hadn't have gotten pregnant, maybe I would be different. She's given me a purpose, a huge reason for everything I do from the moment I found out she was inside me." My throat began to close, because finding out about her hadn't been normal. Even though it hurt, I trudged on. "The second he told me he smelled my baby, everything from that moment on became crystal clear. I had and have to put her first Jake. I don't get to date like everyone else. I don't get to go out to the movies every weekend. Coming to La Push scares me to death. Every time Charlie and I go see Sue with her. I know you put an Alpha command on your pack, and I know you took over to keep us safe. Carlie is my obligation."

The pained expression on his face hurt even more than the memory of Laurent telling me I was with child. As much as I wanted to comfort Jake, I realized any comfort I gave him would further mislead him. I'd been doing that too much. He had said it was alright for me to get comfort from him, but now, for the first time, I saw what that was doing to him, and to me. It wasn't fair, but my life hadn't been for a while now.

Jake looked at me and sighed. "I need to go."I nodded, not ready to say anything. After he got up, Jake stood in place a second before he turned back to the window.

When we were alone again, I let out the breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding. In my arms, Carlie was asleep. Normally I would have put her down in her crib, but right now I needed to hold her. It had been a long time since I thought about that day in the meadow, the day that had changed my life so much.

It was a little past five when Charlie walked in from work. On the floor in the family room, Carlie and I were playing with her puzzles. She was chewing on one peg while I put the other pegs in their respective places. I heard my dad pulling his belt off and the soft thump as he put his gun up on a shelf in the foyer, just like he'd done when I was younger. He didn't join us until he'd changed into jeans and an old shirt. The second Carlie saw him, the peg dropped from her hand and she began to fuss as she reached for him.

Charlie was quick to comply with her fussing, and when he lifted her above his head she laughed, kicking her legs out. "There's my beautiful granddaughter." He settled her against his chest joining me on the floor. Carlie sat on his lap already reaching for another puzzle peg. My dad was unusually quiet.

"So, Billy said something?"

He rubbed the back of his head with his free hand. "Just that Jake came in looking like he'd lost his best friend."

That hurt, but in a way he was right. "We talked. I told him that Carlie comes before anyone else." The only information my dad was getting was what he just heard. It was funny. Since having my daughter, we had begun talking more. There were a lot of good things that had come from having Carlie, and as she smiled at me, I couldn't help but smile back.

"Is some of it because of, well, because of the wolves?" His question didn't surprise me. When everything had happened with Carlie's birth, he was let in on their part of the secret. It was so he wouldn't freak out if he walked out back and found a huge wolf just within the tree line, and because of Sue.

It was a day for changes, as I looked at my father. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Shoot."

"Why is Jake and I getting together so important to you? Why can't I just be a single mom?" I wanted to continue by telling him that Renee had practically raised me by herself, but also knew that would hurt him. Charlie hadn't chosen for her to leave, and he regretted the long lapse of time before I came to live with him when I was seventeen.

While I waited for him to answer, Carlie reached for me. "Hi beautiful girl" She wanted to stand, so I held her up. My little girl was fifteen months old and didn't walk, or really talk. She fussed when she wanted us to do something for her, and that was a worry. Sue said it was due to her being born so early. I had been prepared for developmental delays, but this scared me. It was part of the reason I wanted Edward to come back. Carlisle might be able to shed some light on all of this, if he'd even seen a baby like my Carlie. Sue did the best she could, and I was glad she was a Midwife and could act as my daughter's doctor. The fact that Sue cared enough to help out was a relief. Then again, Carlie had a lot of the woman cooing over her, even Emily, when we were at Sue's house, loved to hold her.

"I don't want to see you struggle."

What my dad said caught me off guard, and I looked past Carlie to him.

"One thing that had to be hard on your mom was that she did it all on her own. Yeah, I got you summers, sometimes, but she had you the rest of the time, and that couldn't have been easy. I don't know because she never would tell me."

There was regret in the tone of his voice and I lifted Carlie to my shoulder while I scooted over to sit next to him. "She loved being my mom, and she never regretted anything. We went on a lot of trips when school was out. Mom was great because she never really grew up." Against my shoulder, Carlie snuggled down and I leaned into my dad as he put his arm around me.

"You had to do a lot of the things she didn't though."

"And having Jake wouldn't change me having to do the things Carlie needs me to? Yeah he could help clean the house, or put her to bed so I could get my homework done without any interruption, but you do a good job of that."

Charlie huffed a little. "Things with Sue are getting serious. I may not always be here like I am now."

His confession wasn't a surprise. "Then I'll be okay wherever we end up."

"How did you grow up so fast?"

Both of us glanced at Carlie as her head lifted and she began to struggle to be let go. He didn't need that answer.

"I'll try and do better about all of this."

"Dad, your doing really good now. Just trust me to do what is right for me and for my little girl."

He nodded before we hugged.

"Will you keep an eye on her while I go get dinner started?"

Carlie was crawling toward the rocking horse that her Grandpa had gotten for her first Christmas just a few months ago. While he went to keep her company, I headed for the kitchen feeling stronger than I had in a long time.


	2. Vacation

**Chapter 2: Vacation**

With my last final behind me, I gathered up my books looking forward to heading home. Leaving the house this morning had been difficult because Carlie had been crying. Charlie didn't worry about her being upset like I did. He said that it was a phase, and that normally she settled down after few minutes. Within the last month my baby had finally learned to walk, though she was still unsteady on her feet, occasionally falling on her bottom some before she got to where she was going. In a few days we would be heading for Florida to see Mom and Phil. Originally I'd agreed to stay the summer. After realizing that I really should try and work some to help with the bills, or at least try, I'd agreed to staying for three weeks. So far Charlie wouldn't let me pay for any of the medical bills from when Carlie was born and stayed up in Seattle for three and a half months. The small things like diapers and our food were acceptable things for me to help pay for.

Driving home, I mentally went over the things I needed to do before leaving for Florida. One aspect of that was going to Port Angeles to get Carlie some warm weather clothes. There were a few nice consignment shops that sold like new baby apparel. Since I was on a tight budget, consignment was the way to go. My phone vibrated once before I tapped on my hands free. "Hey stranger."

"Hey Bella, I'm glad I caught you. When are you going to Florida?" Angela asked

"Four days from now. Why?

"I was hoping we could get together before you left. I've got some things I wanted to tell you." Angela sounded really excited and her excitement was catching.

"I'm going to Port Angeles to shop for Florida. Do you want to come with us?"

"Yeah sure, what time?"

After I gave her that information, we hung up. I turned onto the street we lived on, pulling up to the house a moment later. It had begun to drizzle a little, so I made my way up the sidewalk quickly and carefully, not wanting to slip. Inside I was greeted by the loud cries of my daughter coming from upstairs. That usually meant she was getting a diaper change, something she had never liked from day one.

In my room, Charlie was putting her jeans back on her. I waited for him to finish. "Who's making all that noise?"

Carlie continued crying as I picked her up, so I walked to the window. "Do you see the rain?" Her cries were already quieting, and as I took her small hand and put it against the glass, the cries tapered off. "That's rain. When you get bigger, you will love going outside to stomp in the puddles."

My daughter looked from the window to me. "Should we go downstairs and find your toys?" Carlie sighed, still watching me as we headed down the hall. In the front room I sat down on the carpet between the sofa and the coffee table. Usually Carlie got right down, ready to walk to whatever toy she wanted. Right now I seemed to be what she needed and shared her need to be together. There was a book on the coffee table that I grabbed before I stood, and sat down on the couch. Carlie let me settle her on my lap and as I began to read, Charlie came with her blanket which she reached for the second she saw it.

"How did she do today?"

"More fussy than she normally is. She wanted to be held a lot more. How do you think you did on your Literature Final?"

Before I could tell him, Carlie screeched, which meant she wanted me to read. Charlie grinned at her and me. "I'll be late. Call if you need anything." After kissing us goodbye, he left.

The book only had pictures of different things. Mom had sent a whole set just a few weeks ago and when Carlie was willing, both Charlie and I went over what each picture was.

Her small hand touched one. "Dog," I told her. My daughter tilted her head back to look at me. "Dog," I said again. Carlie smiled at me.

Much later after we had dinner, and Carlie had been bathed and nursed before bed, I sat in my own bed making the list of things we needed to get in Port Angeles tomorrow. The list consisted of a whole summer wardrobe for my baby. Luckily that wouldn't be too much of an expense. I'd set aside the money I'd gotten for Christmas that was left over after I bought the tickets for Florida. Hopefully there would be enough to get me a few summer clothes as well. Once my lists were made, Carlie's diaper bag was packed, and I was dressed for bed, I slid under the covers letting my thoughts go.

I'd asked Charlie a few weeks ago what was wrong with me being a single mom. Taking care of Carlie on my own wasn't something that scared me the way it once had. Jake hadn't been by since we'd talked that one night. I'd told him that Carlie was my obligation and my priority. He would stay and help me raise her if I'd ask him too, but truthfully, it wasn't fair for him. Truthfully, there was only one person I wanted at my side. If Edward came back I wasn't sure how that would work out exactly. The girl he knew wasn't a girl anymore.

My daughter's sudden cry drove everything out of my mind. I got to her before she could get too wound up and lifted her from her crib. "Shhh." The need to have her close took us back to my bed. Once we were settled, and she was nursing I lay watching her. "You have a daddy. I didn't get to know him for long, but I felt like I'd known him for most of my life." As I told her about Edward, I stroked my fingers through her bronze hair. Her eyes were open and were the most beautiful shade of green that I'd ever seen. Had Edward's been this color before he was turned?

The next afternoon while I sat in back of Angela's car with Carlie, she was telling me about her exciting news. "I can't believe he asked me. Well maybe I can."

We both giggled a little. "I'm not surprised. You've been going out since we were in our sophomore year."

Angela nodded and for a little bit we were both quiet. "Ben told me something the other day about when he first asked me out."

When she didn't continue, I glanced at her in the rear-view mirror. "Are you going to finish?"

"It has to do with _him_."

Now I understood her hesitation. "You can say his name. What did he do?"

"Well, he and his brother. Emmett suggested that Ben ask me to the dance. He said it was like a pep talk that the coach gives before a game. Ben said he was afraid that I would say no."

Her news was a surprise because to my knowledge the Cullens didn't really talk to anyone; much less give girl advice to someone. "That's pretty amazing."

"Yeah it is. So how are things going for you?"

I glanced at my baby who had been asleep in her car seat since we left. "Busy. I took two classes thinking it wouldn't be enough, but doing that and taking care of Carlie is a full time job. I'm really lucky because Mom and Charlie want me to continue to go to school during the year. Not only that, they also encouraged me to let them pay for things while I do. I was going to stay in Florida all summer, but I want to make a little money to be able to buy diapers and food that we both need."

Angela nodded. "She seems like she's a good baby."

"She is. Did I tell you she's finally walking?" For the rest of the trip, I filled my good friend in on Carlie, and all that she was learning.

When we got to Port Angeles, Carlie was awake. Angela took us to a McDonalds so Carlie could eat what I had packed for her. Inside was totally chaos. By the time we got our food, Carlie was crying and I was glad when Angela said we could eat in her car. After lunch I got Carlie's stroller set up and once she was strapped in with her blanket and her bunny, we headed for the shops.

Over the next few days I got everything ready for our trip. Carlie was improving on her walking and could say _**dog**_, and _**Ma**_. Early Friday morning we got into Charlie's cruiser while Carlie slept without a care in the world. This was going to be a big change for us. For me it was the first long trip alone with my daughter. Last night I'd barely slept thinking of all the things that could go wrong. Finally I managed to fall asleep, though it only seemed like a few minutes instead of a few hours before my alarm went off.

"How are you feeling about all of this?"

"Better than I was last night. I'm glad I don't have to take her seat with me. Mom said she and Phil bought one for when we visit."

Charlie nodded and the rest of the trip was taken in silence.

When we got to the airport I carried my wide awake sixteen month old, while Charlie got our luggage. At this time of morning the airport wasn't as busy, and after I got my bags checked in, Charlie went with us to a small cafe that had just opened for breakfast. He ordered a muffin which he shared with my baby. Carlie sat on my lap giggling at him when he made faces. A second later she reached for her grandpa, laughing as he lifted her above his head where he blew raspberries on her belly.

A few minutes later, Charlie went with us as far as he could to the security check point. Carlie and I gave him a hug before he left us so we could head on through. Our gate wasn't too far away and since we had a good half hour to go before our flight, I sat down in one of the seats letting Carlie down in front of me.

"Do you want to explore with Momma?"

"Bella?" Mike was walking towards us with Jessica trailing behind. She didn't look very happy, and I knew this was going to be interesting as I lifted my baby to sit on my lap.

"Hey Mike, Jess."

"So this is your little girl. She looks like you."

Jessica rolled her eyes unbeknownst to him, and I chose to ignore her. "Thanks. I get that a lot. So, where are you two headed?"

"Florida. Mike and I are going to look at some colleges down there." Jessica answered

"I'm heading that way myself. My mom lives there with her husband Phil."

After that Mike sat down next to us as Jess told him she was going to get something to eat before the flight started. While I talked to him, Carlie kept her eyes on Mike. When he covered his face to try peek-a-boo, my daughter struggled in my arms until I had her cradled against me so she could hide.

"I didn't mean to aggravate her."

"She's shy."

Our flight being called caught our attention and when the call for mothers with small children to get on the plane, Jessica gave me an annoyed look. This flight was going to be very interesting.

For the first hour of the flight, Carlie was content to sit in my lap and look at her books, eating dried cereal. After that hour, she was getting restless. Once I'd checked her diaper, finding that she was still clean and dry, I did something I'd never tried. Tapping the screen in front of us I turned it on. There was a cartoon channel and the moment the show began to play, even without the sound, my baby was mesmerized. A few minutes later it flicked off and the fasten seat-belt sign came on.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we are in for a bumpy ride for the next few minutes."

Carlie began to fuss, so I got her blanket and draped it over me glad I had something to hopefully keep her settled and quiet. Just as she started to calm down the plane began to bump. Carlie nursed until it got even bumpier and began to cry as did a few other babies behind us.

There were a few more bumps before the plane leveled out, but Carlie was upset as was I. Turbulence wasn't something I had enjoyed on any plane ride. Reminding myself that she was feeding off my fears I took some calming breaths.

"Is there anything I can get for her?" the stewardess asked.

"No, I'm sorry."

"Don't be, it wasn't fun for any of us."

After that I felt a little better and was finally able to get Carlie to calm down and nurse. When she fell asleep a few minutes later, I shut my eyes hoping that the rest of the flight would be turbulent free.

Seven and a half hours later, our plane landed at Jacksonville International Airport. It was a relief to finally get into the airport, and as well that my daughter was in a decent mood. Finally we got to baggage claim which was bombarded with a lot of other people. In my arms Carlie stiffened, so I got her blanket out of her bag, draping it over her head which seemed to help.

"Bella?' I looked around finally spotting my mom with Phil at her side. They made their way through the crowds of people. When she got to me, mom smiled. "That's the blanket I got her."

"She won't sleep without it."

We hugged around Carlie before Mom lifted the blanket. Carlie fussed so she put it back down. "She'll be happier once we get our luggage and get out of here. Carlie doesn't like crowds."

Mom chuckled. "You were never one for large crowds either. Come on, let's get this s how on the road."

Arriving at mom and Phil's an hour and a half later was a huge relief. Carlie had cried herself to sleep and finding a place to curl up with her next to me was going to be really nice.

"Why don't you take Bella up to her room? I can get her things."

When Phil suggested that I was ready to cry, and hug him. I managed to pull myself together before I reached out, carefully unbuckling Carlie from her seat. As I lifted her out she startled awake, but didn't cry as she snuggled against my chest and shoulder. "We're here now."

Mom led the way into the house, up four stairs to the main level. We went down a hallway and into a large room. The room had a huge bed along with a crib and all sorts of toys. I wanted to tell her she shouldn't have, but who was I to deny her the fun of spoiling her granddaughter

The lower level of the house was where my mom and Phil had a huge flat screen TV, along with a pool table and a sectional type sofa. After mom showed me how to get it to recline with the touch of a button, the two of us sat together talking. We hadn't seen one another since Christmas, but somehow it felt longer than that. After she finished telling me about what was going on with her and Phil, she glanced at Carlie who had been asleep in my arms for a while. "She's getting bigger."

My own eyes looked down at my little girl. "I worry that she hasn't grown much at all, or that I'm doing it all wrong."

"You are doing so great honey. I'm very proud of you."

When I finally got up the courage to look at her, Mom had tears going down her cheeks. I reached out with my free arm and hugged her. "I need to hear that every once in a while. It's been hard at home. Jake loves me, but I'm not ready for that kind of love, at this point. I need to focus on college and Carlie."

"And you still love _him_ don't you?"

The tenderness in her voice was a surprise and again I looked away, back down to my baby as I leaned forward placing a kiss on her head. "We didn't get much of a chance to really know one another, and I was in such a different place than I am now, but a part of me still loves him. Living with Dad, I think about what would have happened if he would have left you before knowing about me. What it would have been like if one day he saw you with me, realizing that he had a daughter. He loves me being around. I love being around him, even when we disagree on things. Hurting Edward that way isn't something I can do, but I have no idea how to find them. They didn't stay in California for very long, and no one is willing to give me any private information." Of course there was more to it than what I was telling her, but that was not something I could really share with my mom.

"Do you think he would support you?"

There was no second thought about that. "He would do that and maybe enough that I would want to scream sometimes, but yes, he would support me and his daughter if he knew." Speaking of his daughter, I knew Carlie and I both needed to sleep in a real bed. "Well, I think I'm ready to head upstairs with her and crash for the night."

In our room, Mom pulled the covers back for me before I had her sit in the rocking chair where I put Carlie into her arms. My daughter snuggled against her Gran without waking, and I left them to bond a little while I headed for the shower. After mom left, I settled in bed pulling my baby with her back against my chest. Even though my mom had provided us with a crib, I knew if Carlie woke up she would freak out. This wasn't a place she had ever been, and tonight I needed her in my arms after discussing Edward with my mom.

Three weeks went by in a busy blur. We spent most days on the beach only a half a mile away from the house. Carlie didn't like the sand at all, but surprised me by loving the ocean. She even went under the water when mom blew in her face and came up giggling. Other day's mom took us to a flea market, and to the neighborhood pool. Again while Carlie was in the water, she was active, kicking her legs and would cry when we would try and take her out. My baby learned to say Gra, for Gran, and Puh, for Phil. By the time it our trip was coming to an end, I wasn't looking forward to starting work. It meant I had to leave Carlie behind. At the last minute I changed our flight to take place later in the day so we could hit the beach one more time.

On the way to the airport, Mom sat in back with Carlie and me. My baby held her Gra's hand, listening intently as my mom talked to her about all the things we had done. "You and your momma need to come back and visit real soon."

Carlie looked at me smiling before her attention went back to my mom. Florida was so sunny and so nice that a part of me wanted to come down here to live. Back home it was so cold and gloomy for most of the year. Mom and I had talked a little about making a fresh start. Even though I wanted to find Edward, and spare him finding Carlie when she was a grown woman, having him miss out on everything, I was starting to believe that maybe that part was unavoidable.

At our gate, we had a whole hour to spare, and Carlie wanted to walk, something she had mastered. Since I only had her diaper bag, I put her down and held her left hand as she took the lead. She had on a brand new pair of pink Nike high tops that her Puh had gotten for her, and so far she was okay with wearing them. This time we didn't meet up with Mike or Jessica, not that I really wanted too, and by the time our flight was ready to take off, Carlie was beginning to show signs of being sleepy. On the flight to Atlanta, I kept her awake by letting her watch the TV in front of us.

In Atlanta we had a two hour layover, though by the time I finally got us to our gate, our wait time was cut down to an hour and a half. I found a Subway and ordered a Turkey Sub with lettuce, tomato, and pickles, with a little oil and vinegar. Carlie sat on my lap at one of the tables. I picked out some of the turkey and gave her some of the bread as I ate the rest of the Sub. Both of us shared the large water. Close by I took her into the bathroom finding a stall with a seat for her to sit in as I took care of business.

Carlie watched me while yawning a few times. "I think you are going to sleep all the way home."

"No"

My eyes widened in disbelief. "Do you want to go sleepy in your crib?"

"No"

After I lifted her out, I didn't know what else to do or say. Did she really understand what she was saying, or was I just so tired that I imagined it.

When I sat down in one of the seats near our gate, I put Carlie on my lap, looking at her. "Do you love Momma?"

My angel laughed, leaning into my chest. As she looked up at me I asked again if she was sleepy. This time she shook her head before she got fussy. Since we still had another hour before our flight took off, I got out a book and began to read to her. Mom had gotten her **The Velveteen Rabbit**, and Carlie loved it. We were on the third page when I got the feeling someone was watching us. It wasn't a foreboding feeling or anything fearful. I looked around before shrugging it off and getting back to the story.

As I began to read again, I noticed someone coming towards us from our right. When I looked up, I froze.

**Authors** **Notes: **_Two chapters out of the way. I hope you are enjoying this. I know it's a lot of Bella's thoughts at this point, and that She's not like Cannon Bella in that she is more secure in things, but I hope you will all give me a chance to get more of the story out there. Thank you for the adds and Author Alerts. Thanks also to the reviews. _

_Please do review even if it's one or two words to comment. _

_Thanks again _


	3. One Cullen

**Chapter 3: One Cullen**

My name being said over and over, along with Carlie whimpering in my arms, brought me out of my shocked state. First I comforted my daughter, reaching beside us into her diaper bag. Once she had her bunny, Carlie snuggled against me. My focus went back to the person who had rendered me into a statue just seconds before. This was really happening. "Alice?

Her smile was my reward. Before I knew it I was standing with Carlie settled against my left hip while my free arm pulled Alice into a hug. Seeing her was such a huge relief that I continued to hug her, feeling like I was going to cry. After a moment, or perhaps longer, we parted. Alice's gaze was on Carlie as my baby hid her face against my neck. There was a questioning look in Alice's eye, and I wondered if she had a vision of some sort. Where did I begin?

"I can't believe we're finally here," she said, confirming to me that it had been a vision that brought her to this place. I glanced behind her wondering if Jasper was close by.

As if she could read minds, she said. "He didn't come with me. When I saw this, it was just the two of us, but not this little one."

We sat down. Gently I rocked my daughter, still trying to figure out what to say to Alice. Before they left, we were getting close. Alice had said we would be good friends. Then they were gone and it all seemed like a dream. Next to me Alice sat looking at my baby, at me and around. "This is Carlie, my little girl."

This time Alice took a second to respond. "She's not like any being I've ever met. Is she?"

When I nodded Alice smiled until it stretched across her face. "I don't know how that is possible, but this is so wonderful."

"When did you see us here?"

"A few weeks ago, I wasn't looking for you. Well, truthfully I haven't had a vision of you since before we all left. Jasper didn't come because I only saw the two of us. I can't see her at all."

That alarmed me, but I quickly squashed down my panic. Against my shoulder Carlie was falling asleep, and the last thing I wanted was to upset her. "Do you know why?"

Alice shook her head. "It could be the same reason my brother can't hear your thoughts."

"How is he?" I'd asked without a second thought, only living in the moment for now.

Alice frowned before sighing. "He hasn't been living with any of us since we left. Every now and again he calls Carlisle. The last time they spoke, two and a half months ago, he was in Argentina."

The times I had wondered about Edward, I'd imagined him happy. In my soul, I had known that he'd only left because he wanted to keep me safe. That aspect of our relationship hadn't bothered me when we were together. Now that I was more independent, if he came back, I would want to make sure he respected my choice to choose for myself and for Carlie.

"I'll be right back." Alice moved as she always had, just as a dancer would across a stage.

Carlie turned her head facing away from me as I continued rocking her, along with rubbing her back. How would I feel if this led to bringing Edward back into our lives? I'd been Carlie's only parent since the day she drew her first breath of air. Faced with the possibility that I would see him again, how did I handle sharing her care with him? This was not going to be very easy.

"Alright, I got a first class ticked for myself, and I got you and Carlie upgraded."

Alice was smiling at me and I decided instead of feeling uncomfortable about her generosity, just to role with it.

On the flight back to Port Angeles, Carlie woke only briefly while I changed her diaper, and put a warm pair of pajamas on her. When she fell back asleep, Alice and I continued to visit. "Right now we are all living in Denali with Tanya and her sisters along with Eleazar and Carmen. Carlisle and Esme just got back from Brazil. They have an island there."

My eyes widened. "A whole island?"

She smiled. "Esme had always wanted a place where they could be out in the sun without the worry of being seen."

"What about you and Jasper?"

"We've been staying in Paris. They have the most beautiful clothing, and there are a few people who design clothing for the family. So, what is it like being a mother? I never thought about having children."

How much time did we have? "There is so much that I've gained having her. She woke me up. After you all left, I stopped functioning. I stopped eating. I was having these horrible dreams. No one could really get through to me. The second I found out I was pregnant, it was like having a person dump a bucket of cold water over my head. At first, I didn't think it could be right, but then I realized that I was several weeks late, and the rest is history. It's a lot of work to take care of her, but I've never minded it." I wasn't sure how much more to add. There was a dark part to all of this, to me finding out, to Carlie being born four months before she was due. I wasn't ready to dig out those memories.

For the next few hours, Alice asked me all about babies. I didn't mind answering her questions. When the captain came over the com system to announce our descent, thoughts of Alice leaving again had my heart rate elevating. Casually I asked, "Are you leaving?"

My friend smiled at me, reaching out to take my free hand. "There was a reason to all of this, so no."

"What about Jasper?"

Again Alice smiled. "It won't be easy to be away from him, but I feel being back here with you is right. I'm going to stay at our home in Forks. Jasper will be here in a week if not sooner, but I won't tell him about Carlie."

"Thank you. Hopefully Edward will be the next person to find out." As I told her that, I shut my eyes. "I don't know Alice. I'm so used to it just being me, Carlie and my dad."

"You don't need to make that choice right now."

By the time we landed and got to the baggage claim area, Carlie was awake again. It was half past ten, and way past her bed time. Alice left my side, having already programmed her number into my cell. Letting Charlie know that she was back, wasn't something I was prepared for at the moment. When my baby began to laugh I followed her gaze, seeing my dad heading our way. The second he was at our side, Carlie was leaning towards him, laughing more when he took her from me.

After Dad hugged Carlie giving her lots of kisses, he wrapped his arm around me. "I missed you both so much."

It felt good to be in his embrace. "We missed you too."

Once we had all my bags, Charlie led the way outside, carrying Carlie in one arm, and her diaper bag over his shoulder. Next to him I pulled my suitcase and carried Carlie's smaller case which had a lot more clothing in it, thanks to mom and Phil. At the car Dad handed Carlie back. While he put our things in his trunk, I got in the back of the cruiser starting to put Carlie in her seat when she began to struggle and cry. "Hey sweet baby." As I settled her against my shoulder Carlie calmed down. "Dad, do you have time enough for me to try and get her to sleep?"

"Sure thing." As he got the car started, I checked Carlie's diaper and got her into something dry before I grabbed her blanket and settled her in my arms. While she nursed, I let Charlie know about our time in Florida. "She absolutely loved the ocean. Mom put her under the water, and I was half expecting her to come up screaming, but she was as happy as could be."

"Have you thought about going to the YMCA in Port Angeles? You might be able to sign her up for swim lessons."

"I didn't think about that. I'll have to see how everything turns out when I get a job."

Dad nodded, glancing back at me. "Who were you talking to at the airport?"

Crap, he had seen. "Alice Cullen."

"How is she? I always liked Alice, but hold on does that mean?"

"No dad, she's here checking on the family house for her parents. I think they may end up selling it?" Lying to my dad wasn't something I liked, and the fact that it came easily had me feeling slightly guilty. In my arms, Carlie was falling asleep, and I hoped she would be in a deep enough sleep for me to get her in her seat without her crying.

"That house is huge."

It was huge, and held some fond memories for me. A few minutes later I got my sleeping baby strapped into her seat without a hitch. Since she was so small, her seat faced the back of the car.

"Do you think you'll see her while she's around?"

"I don't see any harm in it. And if you're curious, I'm putting a lot of thought into seeing Edward again. I'm used to raising Carlie on my own, well with your help, but I just don't know yet."

"Take your time. I'm still not happy with how he left things."

Truthfully, neither was I, but as I watched my daughter sleeping, the old thoughts of having answers to questions I had all her life began to drift into my mind. She wasn't entirely human, and even though she ate regular food, and she nursed, one aspect of her life would possible mean she would one day have to drink blood like her father. If I didn't have Edward, how was I to manage that?

Getting home into my own bed with my baby asleep in her own bed was a relief. I doubted I was going to get much sleep. There was too much going through my thoughts to try and shut my eyes. A few minutes later I grabbed the laptop that had been a joint gift between Charlie, Mom and Phil when I got my GED. On nights when I couldn't sleep, I kept a digital journal, and began to write out my thoughts and my feelings. I never brought up the supernatural parts, just in case someone found a way to read my files. When I found out about being pregnant, and it was confirmed first by a pregnancy test, and second when I approached Sue to tell her my concern, she suggested that I talk to someone. Fortunately for me that someone happened to be a friend of hers. I didn't share that I was pregnant, instead focusing on what had caused me to shut down. As part of the healing process, my counselor had suggested journaling, which had helped.

"Ma." Carlie began to fuss after she called out for me.

Once my computer was shut down, I went to her bed and lifted her out. "It's late. Are you wet? You are wet. Let me get that taken care of." After I got her diaper and wipes, I sat back down on my bed, laying my baby between my legs.

Carlie smiled at me. "Ma."

"What baby?"

My daughter responded by laughing at me as I unsnapped her sleeper and got her changed. Normally I would nibble her belly and play with her, but it was a little after one in the morning, and Carlie needed to go back to sleep. Both of us needed that. Minutes later we were snuggled together. As she nursed, I worked on shutting down all of my thoughts. The easiest way to do that was for me to focus on her. Being able to nurse Carlie hadn't been something I'd thought I would be able to do because she didn't even way a pound when she was born. By the time she was a month old, weighing just over a half a pound, she was drinking the milk I pumped. By the time she was two months old, she was up to two and a half pounds and her doctors had been amazed when I was able to nurse her. After that she continued to grow and thrive and we came home almost four months to the day of her birth with Carlie weighing five pounds three ounces.

While my baby fell asleep, and after pulling my shirt back down, I drew her in closer to me. In the beginning I'd tried to get her to sleep in her crib, but soon found it easier to put her in bed with me. Sue and Charlie got me a little bed that hung from the side of mine and for a while she slept there.

Nap time during the day, Carlie slept in her bed. Most nights she started out in her crib, but ended up with me. Finally I began to get tired, and focused all my attention on Carlie's breathing, timing my breaths with her until I did get to sleep.

The next morning after Charlie had gone in to work, I called Alice and invited her over. As I sat beside the rocking horse holding on to Carlie's back, my baby was enjoying the back and forth motion of her horse. Figuring out how to make him move on her own wasn't something Carlie could do, and as she continued to rock with my help, Carlie laughed. When Alice knocked on the door a minute later, I told her without raising my voice to come in. The second Carlie saw her, my daughter was reaching for me. She hid her face into my neck as I got up and walked to the sofa Alice had seated herself on. "Did you talk to Jasper?"

"Yes. He says to tell you hello."

"Tell him hello the next time you talk to him." Before I could say anything else, Carlie lifted her face away from my neck and looked over at Alice. "Carlie, this is your Aunt Alice."

Alice reached down in her purse and pulled out a beautiful toy. It was a butterfly full of pastel colors. When Alice shook it, the butterfly lit up and began to play music. My daughter smiled watching as the wings lit up one by one. Each color on the wing would light up as the music played. When it stopped, Alice shook it again and it started back up. A second later, Carlie leaned forward, Alice took her and settled my baby on her lap, letting Carlie have her new toy. "She's beautiful Bella."

"Thank you. Thank you for the toy as well, it's really nice."

"After we parted, I went to Seattle and found a neat little toy store. I thought she might like this. Bella, I'm not having any visions now of us, or what reason we came together. It's like something is blocking them."

This morning I'd thought about Jake and the pack. They had been able to kill Laurent and also Victoria. "Alice, were you here the last time your family was? Not when I came to live with Charlie, but before I was even born?"

"No. Wait, you know about that?"

Carlie struggled to be let down, and after she was on her own two feet, my baby walked with her toy over to her little activity blanket where she sat down shaking the butterfly. "When I was trying to figure out about Edward, well around that time I went to first beach with Mike, Jessica and a bunch of other people. Jacob and some of his friends came along. I got him to tell me about this legend of his people. He said that his great grandfather made a pact with a new tribe. Later on I kind of connected the dots."

Alice's gaze was unwavering as I finished. "Wolves?" When I nodded she gasped. "Bella, that is very dangerous."

Before Alice continued, I shook my head. "No, they saved my life and Carlie's more than once. I can't go into what happened, it's something I've done my best to put in the back of my mind, and if it comes to the front again, Edward will be the first to know. Just trust me on this one thing. Jacob Black is the Alpha of his pack and he's protected both of us."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yes."

"How do you feel about him?" Her question surprised me, but I wasn't upset that she asked. "Truthfully, it's been really hard. After I found out I was pregnant, and word got around as it does, there was a threat from some of the members of the pack. To keep me safe, Jake became Alpha of his pack, something he was meant to do. He put a command that none of his pack could touch me, and later on Carlie when she was born. He was there for me Alice, in ways that I didn't think he could handle because of what his pack is meant to do. For a while I thought about letting him in, but the more I thought about it, the more I knew that couldn't happen."

"Ma" Carlie toddled over to me and when I picked her up she leaned away and fussed.

"She wants to eat."

Alice followed me into the kitchen and even held Carlie while I got my daughter a snack of grapes, sliced apples, and some ham. After Carlie was in her highchair eating the food I put down for her, I got back to Jake. "I've been wondering if at some point if Carlie would need blood. I told Jake one day she might, and he said he would hunt for her, but that isn't his responsibility."

"And that is why you need Edward." It wasn't a question.

"This is so hard," I said as I began to feed Carlie some yogurt. "I still feel connected to him. I know that has to do with having his baby, Alice. I also want him to know her because I don't want him to end up seeing her someday when she's all grown up and have him miss all of what she's doing now. She's almost seventeen months old. She needs a relationship with her father. I just don't know what he will think. My dad is scared for him to come back and we argue about it. I've told him that Edward would support us, but maybe that's wishful thinking."

Alice shook her head, reaching out to put her hand on my shoulder. "It isn't. He was raised in a time where men took responsibility. He has been limited on how much he can show of his maturity because of how young he looks. Even you have yet to see all of who he is and all the things he can do."

While she told me about her investing skills, and how Edward helped to manage the family finances along with Carlisle, I got Carlie cleaned up. I also got her interested in a plastic bowl and wooden spoon to play with on the floor so I could put away the dishes. It made sense that Edward knew more than the average teenager. In reality he was much older even if he didn't look that way. He had seen more than anyone else I knew aside from Carlisle and some of the other Cullens.

Back in the family room, Alice and I sat on the floor playing with Carlie. It was fun to watch my friend get used to being around her niece. At first Alice was hesitant with some things. By the time she left around noon so I could get my daughter down for a nap, she was much more at ease. In our room, I took Carlie's jeans off and changed her diaper, leaving her just in her onesie as I sat in her rocking chair nursing her. I also dialed Billy's getting Jake on the second try. "Hey."

"Hey. How was your trip to Florida?"

"It was good. Carlie learned to swim in the ocean. Jake, I need you to know that Alice Cullen is back. It's just her for now and in a week her mate will be arriving. Beyond that I don't know anything else."

"I need to tell the counsel and Bell's, I kind of need to see you. I've got news of my own."

"I don't start work for another week or so." When I hung up with him a few minutes later, I laid Carlie down in her crib pulling a different polar fleece blanket over her than the one she was snuggling with. Jake sounded different, and as I headed downstairs, I began wondering what was up with him. He hadn't even really been freaked out about Alice being around. Deciding not to worry about his reaction, I worked on getting things cleaned up. I also got on my laptop and emailed my mother, telling her that the flight had been pretty uneventful. I decided not to bring Alice up until I had too.

As I was sitting down to read a book, my dad called. "Hey, Sue has invited us to her house for dinner. Do you feel up to going?"

"Yeah, I need to see Jake anyway. Do you want to meet us there?"

"Nah, we can take your truck."

Dinner with Sue and her family was going to be interesting. Seeing Seth would be great. He loved Carlie and my daughter loved being around him because he was great and keeping her occupied. His sister Leah had been pretty hostile towards me in the beginning. Now she kind of had some respect for me for raising my baby on my own, and she also was with Jake on helping keep Carlie safe. I knew she was part of the pack, and Jake had said she wanted to learn to stop phasing eventually so she could have a family of her own.

It was raining by the time we got to La Push. My dad held an umbrella over me and Carlie as we headed up the stairs onto Sue's porch. At the door, Seth let us in. When Carlie saw him she clapped her hands. "Mom's in the kitchen, he told Charlie. While my dead headed that way, Seth led the way to the back of the house to their family room. There was a lot more room than we had at our house, and they had a flat screen which was almost as big as the one we had. After getting Carlie's sweater taken off, I put her down on the blanket with all the toys.

"Where's Leah?"

"Out with Jake patrolling."

I nodded as I joined my daughter on the floor. "So how are things going with the Pack?"

"Pretty good. Sam is trying to stop phasing. He and Emily want to try and have a family which he can do even if he's phasing, but, well, he's still having a hard time since Jake took over. I don't get it because Jake being Alpha has always been the way it was meant too. Oh yeah, guess what?"

"What?" I smiled as he kept talking, giving me the low down on things going on with the pack.

At dinner, Leah was with us, and fed Carlie for me as we ate. She was quiet, we all were, and I felt like something big was about to happen. When my dad cleared his throat we all looked at him. "I, well I wanted to know what you guys thought about me asking Sue to be my wife."

For some reason I hadn't seen that one coming, even though dad had been hinting towards it. Seth was the first one to respond happy for the announcement. I looked at Leah as she looked at me, not sure what I felt. I wanted my dad to be happy. I had always wondered why he hadn't found someone like mom had with Phil. Now that it was happening, my future began to waver a little.

Leah agreed that it was about time Charlie did the respectable thing, which left my opinion. "Yeah. I think this is the right move for you Dad." What was this going to mean for my daughter and me. I wasn't ready to move out of the house, or if Sue moved in would she want me and the baby around. My baby fussed, likely picking up on my anxiety, so I cleaned her up and carried her into the family room. As I sat down cradling her in my arms, she reached up and patted my lips. Carlie watched me without a smile on her face as I looked down at her, playing with her hair.

Beside me the sofa sank a little before a familiar arm draped over my shoulder. Carlie smiled at my dad, but didn't reach for him. "Did I surprise you?"

"Yeah." Was all I could think to say to him.

"Bells, I don't expect you to leave the house. And we aren't going to do this right away. We have to figure out where we want to live. The house is paid off, and if I decide to live here you and Carlie can continue to live there. Sue knows that your mom and I have been supporting you and she agrees that helping you while you continue to go to school is what is best. If we move into to the house, you and Carlie are staying, that is if you still want too." When he hugged me I took a deep breath. Carlie patted dad's cheek and laughed as he nibbled her fingers.

At home, once Carlie was down for the count, I pulled the rocking chair around so I could look out the window. It was still raining outside, a steady rain which tapped on the window and on the roof top. I hadn't gotten a chance to talk to Jake, and my mind was still trying to work all of this out. My confidence and my security came from knowing that I had my father. With him and Sue planning on getting married, the security I'd felt was starting to crumble a little.


	4. Needing

**Chapter 4: Needing**

Going back to work after three weeks off wasn't easy. The hardest part was being away from Carlie. It had been that way when I started college. I'd taken a year off due to Carlie's premature birth. I had also needed that time to adjust to being a mother and to heal from the attack. I'd been able to fit in some online GED courses during that time. What had been different was that she was with me all the time.

"How much is this tent?" The man holding the tent brought it to the checkout counter.

"One hundred and fifty dollars." It wasn't surprising when he took it back to the shelf where the other tents were sitting. The people who liked to camp were the best customers. They knew that the tent the man had just put back really was a great deal. Those who were beginners were the people who tended to shy away from things that were over one hundred dollars. Being back at **Newton's Outfitters** wasn't bad. Mike and Jessica were still in Florida for another three weeks, and Mrs. Newton was one of the only people in town who treated me like a normal twenty year old woman. When Mrs. Newton returned from getting her lunch, I clocked out and grabbed my bag, glad that I only had to work opening shift.

On the way home, I called Alice. "I'm done working."

"Do you want me to come see you, or you could come over here. I've gotten everything cleaned up."

Carlie should be asleep by now. Do you mind coming over?"

"No, I'll be there soon."

After hanging up I sighed. Having Alice around was a breath of fresh air. She was always upbeat, and with Charlie talking wedding plans with Sue, upbeat was what I needed. When I got home, Charlie greeted me at the door. "Hey, how was work?"

"Not too bad. I didn't do so great at sales, but it's kind of an off day. Even Mrs. Newton agreed to that. How is Carlie?" The second he frowned, my mommy radar turned on.

"She hardly ate anything this morning. I tried all of her old favorites. Also tried rubbing her gums with the gel, but she kept pushing the food off her tray." Carlie had always been a picky eater. That finickiness was one of the reasons I still nursed her.

"Did she play like she normally does?"

"Yes, she had a good morning doing that. Well, I need to head in to work. It's going to be a late night. Sue and I are going to Port Angeles for dinner."

Once Charlie had gone, I went upstairs without making any noise. Carlie was sound asleep huddled up in a little ball. Carefully I snagged a blanket from the bottom of her crib, draping it over her little body. Moments later, my angel sighed and stretched out. Knowing that Alice would be here soon, if she wasn't already, I headed back downstairs. When she knocked on the door a second later, I let her in watching as she hung her white designer coat on the rack. "You can come over when Charlie is around you know."

"I know. It seemed like you two needed to talk. Is it normal for a baby to not want to eat?" she asked as we walked into the family room, taking a seat on the sofa.

"For Carlie, yes. It has always been a challenge to get her to eat table foods. That's why she still gets to nurse. The woman my dad is going to marry has encouraged me to keep it up. I also think she's trying to get used to me being away from her for several hours at a time."

Alice didn't respond right away. "I bet it's hard for both of you. I know that being away from Jazz hasn't been easy. If you had a choice would you stay at home with her all the time?"

Her question was something I had thought about. "I would love too. What keeps me from doing that is responsibility. Charlie, Mom, Phil, they didn't bring my baby into the world. As nice as it is to have the help financially and otherwise, ultimately I've got to find a way to take care of her and me. It's why I took my first semester of college. I've thought about Edward coming into our lives again. I want him to know his little girl, but I'm not sure about letting her have all the newest toys. I want her to learn to appreciate what she has."

"This is all new for me, being her Aunt. I'd love to order some things for her from Paris. They have such cute dresses, and shoes. The way I look at it for us is that we do appreciate what we have. We don't wear clothing more than once or twice before we donate it to places like Pregnancy Centers, or places that help those who have fallen on hard times. If I had a child, I would teach them how to take care of their things, even the nicer things."

Alice wasn't offended, because she was smiling at me as we sat together. I hadn't thought of how they took care of the things they owned in respect to what she told me. "I guess it's just different for me, because I was raised on a school teacher's salary, and from the child support my dad sent us. The few friends I did have while I was living with my mom were in the same financial bracket as we were."

"My niece is waking up."

Carlie was sitting up in her crib when the two of us walked in. The second she saw me, Carlie began to cry. "Hey you, I'm right here." Normally the second she was in my arms, Carlie settled down. As I held her she drew in a breath and continued crying.

"I'll come back later," Alice said over my baby's cries. As much as I wanted her to stay, Carlie being this upset after a nap wasn't her normal behavior.

My daughter drew in another breath crying louder as I got her blanket. After sitting down in the rocking chair I cradled her in my arms. It was a huge relief when she began to nurse and the crying cut off. Her light green eyes were focused on my face while I rocked her. "Grandpa said you didn't eat very much." Carlie blinked at me, but was focused on getting her stomach full. This wasn't like her. Maybe staying with her was what would make things better. But as I'd told Alice, having Dad and Mom along with Phil paying for us wasn't fair to them. They were willing to do this for me. A small hand patting my chin caught my attention. This time when I looked at my baby, she pulled away and smiled at me. "You know what you want don't you?

"Ma" She was giving me her answer and how could I deny her anything when she smiled at me and looked at me with her beautiful eyes and long eye lashes.

The next morning after a normal evening with my baby, I called Mrs. Newton and explained to her that Carlie was under the weather. "Charlie said she hardly ate while I was working, and she was fussy most of the afternoon." Only the first part was true, and a little bit on the second.

"I'm sorry to hear that she's not feeling good. You stay there. Little ones need extra love from their Momma's when they are feeling poorly."

"Actually, I think I may end up spending the rest of the summer with her. I will come in and work two weeks…"

Mrs. Newton interrupted. "Bella, don't worry about us. You just take time with your little girl, alright?"

After hanging up I went downstairs. Charlie was sitting in his recliner with Carlie on his lap playing peek-a-boo. He had put one of her old burp clothes over her head. When she pulled it off, Carlie laughed like the game was the funniest in her little world.

"So?"

She was fine with me staying today. Actually she said that I didn't have to come back. Are you sure about this?"

My dad was about to answer when Carlie tried putting the burp cloth up to cover his face. For the next couple of moments, I had to wait for his answer, not minding as my baby laughed more when he uncovered his face. "Bella, I wouldn't offer if I didn't mean it." Somehow I was going to find a way to pay him back.

When Carlie went down for her nap at noon, Alice showed up with her laptop. For the next hour she showed me baby fashions straight from Paris. Even though the prices were way over what I would pay for clothing, even for myself, what she was showing me was really cute. "The great thing is that it all stays in shape well. See, look."

I read the print below one of the cute sundresses. The material was treated so that it wouldn't stain. It could be washed in a delicate cycle in a washing machine. Was it really going to hurt me to let her buy something? "Alice. You can buy her one dress with accessories. No more than just one."

In the next moment Alice was hugging me, laughing. A second later we were both laughing. "So, which one are you getting her?"

Instantly the computer was taken from my lap. "That will be my surprise to you. What size is she now?"

"Fifteen month, but get something in fourteen month. She's pretty little still."

As Alice began typing what she needed for the order, she told me Carlie was stirring.

When I got to my baby, she was still asleep, but was also restless. Maybe she was actually having a growth spurt. Once she settled down again, and had a blanket back over her bare legs, I went back to Alice, hoping to sneak a peek at what she was getting. In the den, my friend was sitting patiently without the computer. "You already finished?"

"It doesn't take long if you know what to look for, and I do. Well, what should we talk about now?"

"I've been thinking about Edward. Alice, there were a few things that happened while you guys were gone that he will need to know. I mean, I guess maybe since it's already happened he doesn't need the specifics. See there were some things that happened and I don't want him to get overprotective if I tell him."

"Bella, one thing that I know he has been doing a lot of is thinking about how he left you. It was easy for him to forgive Jazz for that night, easier than I ever thought he would. Forgiving his part in it, or what he believes is his part has and is taking a long time. He regrets very deeply how he left things between you. He told me a while ago that he was the coward because he was afraid of the choices you were wanting to make."

"About becoming one of you?"

She nodded putting her cold hands on mine. "How do you feel about that, about being like us?"

It had been a long time since the need to become a vampire had been on my mind. "Honestly, I don't know anymore. I've gotten used to living. Carlie is a huge part of that. I told you before that she woke me up, but it's so much more than that. She's grown from fitting in the palm of my hand to the little girl she is now. Watching that has been pretty incredible. It's really hard Alice. I miss him so much. I miss getting to really know him. You are right, I don't know him very well, and I want to know him better. At the same time I'm afraid of sharing our daughter with him. I'm afraid that he'll know more than I will."

Her smile made me feel better. "When he finds out, he will likely be afraid at first. He won't have all the answers and to my knowledge nothing like this has ever happened. She's…"

Carlie's cries reached me before Alice could finish. When I got to her she was screaming at the top of her lungs. My baby arched away from me as I lifted her out of the crib. Her little body was warmer than normal and when I tried nursing her she arched away from me shaking her head as she continued to cry and scream.

A second later Alice came with her scan thermometer. Carlie had a fever of 103.1.

Sue needed to be called, but I doubted she would hear me over Carlie's angry cries.

"Do you want me to hold her?"

When I nodded, Alice took Carlie, totally ticking her off. Downstairs I used the house line and dialed the Clearwater's, praying that Sue wasn't someplace delivering a baby. "Hello?"

"Leah, is your mom home?"

"Nope, Charlie came and got her about twenty minutes ago."

"Crap, Carlie has a fever 103.1."

"You need to get her to the hospital. I'll get them to meet you down there."

Leah hung up before I could object. Back in my room, Alice already had a bag packed for me and handed me my very angry baby. She took off past me down the stairs. Outside Alice had my truck started. I got in the front passenger seat trying to comfort Carlie, but she wasn't having any of it.

"Alice, I don't know what they will find."

"Let me worry about that. Can I call Carlisle?"

"Yes."

Carlie arched backward from my shoulder screaming louder before she threw up all over me.

Never in all my life, had I been so afraid than I was at this moment. In my arms, Carlie was beginning to calm down as best she could. The nurse had hooked an IV up to the back of her little arm, taping it up so my baby couldn't get the needle out. They had given her medicine in the IV which had stopped her dry heaving. Against my chest, her little chest heaved as she fought to catch her breath from all the crying she had been doing.

The curtain in our little ER cubical pulled back and my dad walked towards us. I shook my head not wanting him to talk. Right now my baby was calm. I didn't want to set her off again. Alice walked next to him and motioned for him to go with her. If she had been able to get a hold of Carlisle, I didn't know. Alice hadn't been able to get him after we got here. I was so out of sorts, I even told her to get Edward. Something was wrong with my beautiful baby. Maybe it wasn't anything other than a virus, but she'd never been sick once, even when she was in the NICU after her birth.

Time seemed to slow down as I rocked Carlie, softly humming to her while she continued to catch her breath. Finally her breathing began to even out.

Around that time the curtain was pulled aside and a doctor walked in. "Bella, I'm Doctor Sands. We need to be able to take a sample of blood to see what is causing her to be sick like she is."

"No."

The doctor pulled up a stool. "Can you tell me why you don't want that?"

_**Maybe because if I did let you, you would find things in her blood you couldn't understand**_. I thought out my answer, but knew I couldn't tell him that. "I want to see if fluids will help her. If she gets any worse I'll consider a blood sample." For a long few moments he sat on that stool. If he told me he couldn't admit us, I'd take her home and wait for Carlisle to come.

Another doctor came in, motioning for Doctor Sands. I wondered what was happening. Was I in trouble for not letting them take her blood? I hadn't thought about their reaction. Maybe they thought I'd done something to her. Against my chest, Carlie began to whimper. "Shhh, I have you little angel. I'm not going anywhere."

Doctor Sands walked back over. "We need to admit her. Doctor Frances informed me that she is going to be seen by a Doctor Cullen." As he left, I shut my eyes thanking God for Alice and for Carlisle. Did this mean that Edward would come too? One thing at a time, I thought. There was a lot going on and I needed to focus on the baby in my arms.

Getting our own room up in the Pediatric Ward brought back memories of the long time Charlie and I spend at Children's in Seattle. While we were there, Carlie was in the NICU with a few other babies who had been born before their due date. Of course, Carlie had been the tiniest baby there.

"Bells?"

This time I didn't try and get him to be quiet. "Hey dad."

"Alice said she called her father?"

"I'm not comfortable with anyone else seeing her. I know that Sue has been taking care of Carlie, but I also know she's limited. Carlisle knows a lot about all sorts of things."

My dad stood watching me as I rocked with his grand-baby. "Does this have anything to do with her never being sick, and what happened…" He didn't finish, but I knew what Charlie wanted to say.

"What happened when I was attacked?"

My dad nodded.

"Yes. I can't tell you anymore than what I have. I don't remember much until we were here and when they flew me to Seattle before she was born. Charlie, please give me time okay?"

A second later, he had pulled up a chair in front of me. Charlie reached out and began to rub his hand over Carlie's back. "Bells, I've seen a lot of things in the past few years. It's really hard not to know."

It was hard for me to keep secrets, but something inside me was telling me this was one thing he could never know. The sudden shift in my arms before Carlie began to cry again put my focus on her. "Hey sweet Angel."

Her cries tapered off this time, and when she went back to sleep I was relieved.

Soft voices filtered into my sleep filled mind. My eyes opened focusing on Carlie's sweet head which rested against my chest below my chin. I knew I hadn't been asleep long. Glancing at the door, I did my best to make out what was being said. So far only the nurses had been coming in to check Carlie's temperature. It had only gone up slightly, and she hadn't thrown up since we got here. My body was still sticky even though I'd put on a hospital gown. Alice had brought a change of clothes, but there was no way I was going to put my baby down.

As the door was being opened slowly, I expected another nurse. The person who came inside was wearing a pair of dark designer slacks, a blue button down top with the sleeves rolled up past his elbows, and his hair styled just the way I had remembered it. His face seemed older somehow, as if he had aged during his time away. Edward walked over to us and knelt down in front of the rocking chair. Without a word he reached out and put his left hand over mine which was resting against Carlie's back. The relief I felt was instantaneous. Yes we had a great deal to figure out, but now he was here, and right now all that mattered was that our daughter was going to get the help she needed.

**Authors Notes: _I am truly grateful for all of you for reading my story. I know I've been gone for a long time, and I didn't know how many people would still be ready to read this. Thank you all so much for reading, and for adding me to your lists. Thank you also for the reviews. It really helps me to know what you all think, and to give me a little nudge in the direction to take this story. More coming your way soon._**


	5. Edward

**Chapter 5: Edward**

The solitude that was my existence had not eased the decision to leave behind the one I loved. Every second there was some reminder of Bella. Doing my best to keep connected to her in some way, I had gone to the UK and visited all of the places from her favorite book, Wuthering Heights. Normally I would have taken in the beauty of the countryside, even with the rain. Without Bella, nothing in my life had any meaning.

Something had pulled me back to Washington. When the jet landed in Seattle, I checked my phone seeing that Alice had called several times. Without hesitation I pushed speed dial, wondering what could be so urgent. More than likely Rosalie and Emmett were getting married again. Since the first time they had married, I'd always served as my brother's Best Man.

"Edward, oh thank God. You need to come to Forks now!"

"What are you doing in Forks? Alice I specifically told you not…"

"Shut. Up. You have a daughter who is hospitalized and quite sick. Bella's frantic. I'm doing what I can to keep all the doctors from finding out her differences. Don't think, just get here now!"

My mind was capable of processing multiple things at one time. While I made my way into the back alleys, leaving the city behind me in less than a minute, my ability to think had gone away. Alice would never lie to me on something this serious.

One summer day my control over my reactions to Bella completely slipped away. The number of times I tried to berate myself for that slip, I'd failed. In our meadow, on a sunny clear day, Bella had never been more beautiful. She had worn a sundress, one she informed me was bought before her move to Washington. Something had shifted in the way I viewed her. Before I could think, my lips had been on hers. We had kissed before. I had been getting better at controlling my thirst for her blood. Moving past the thirst, I found that kissing her was better than any blood I had ever tasted. The sweetness of her lips, and her breath, the way she moved when I began to trail my hands over her bare arms. Her heart beat was so fast; I could have sworn that it was going to take flight. When she pushed at my chest, I allowed myself to fall back, bringing her with me. Quickly Bella had straddled my chest, and the look in her eyes had gone from the innocent girl I loved, to the young woman I wanted to spend the rest of my existence with.

To keep out of site when arriving in Forks, I took back roads until I was at the hospital. The moment I stepped into the parking lot, Alice was waiting. My sister was relieved to see me. "How long have you known?"

"Ask me that after you see them." Her tone was much gentler than it had been when we talked on the phone. My sister smiled at me. "This is real Edward. Carlisle is on his way. He should be here in the morning. Bella named her Carlie."

There were so many questions and so much I wanted to know. What brought my thoughts to focus was the Hospital and how much Bella hated being in one "How old Carlie?"

"Sixteen months old." Alice and I walked through the halls without being stopped. I supposed we were still recognized as the children of Carlisle Cullen. In the elevator going up to the second floor, we were alone. Alice had been letting me see the past week and a half she had been with Bella up to the point when I arrived. My sister's guess was that Carlie needed blood. Since Carlie was also part of her mother, we needed to let Carlisle make the final say.

When we got to the second floor, Alice left me to distract Charlie. Once he was occupied, I moved past the waiting room walking past the nurse's station so fast that they didn't even see me. As I arrived at room 206, I heard several things. The only two sounds I concerned myself with were the heartbeats. Bella's was the same as I remembered. It was slightly elevated, but given the circumstances, that was understandable. The other was beating a little faster than that of a human baby Carlie's age.

Slowly I entered the room, my eyes finding Bella the moment the door cleared my vision. Her eyes found mine locking on to me as I walked to them. The baby resting against her chest was our daughter. I blinked before kneeling down in front of them, placing my hand against hers. Neither of us spoke a word. After a moment I moved my hand below Bella's, touching our baby for the first time. There were so many things I didn't know. So many questions I wanted to ask. I had been such a coward.

"You're here." Bella's voice cracked, and I stood going to the side of the chair.

"I should never have left you. Please forgive my stupidity."

She sniffed. "Nothing to forgive."

There was a lot to forgive. Now, however, was not the time to argue that. "Tell me what I can do?"

"Promise me that no matter what happens you won't ever leave me again. Promise me that if I get mad at you, after this is behind us, you will still love me. Promise me that when I tell you the other things you need to hear, you won't overreact."

"I am never leaving your side again Bella. Leaving was the biggest mistake of my life."

"It was really really stupid." She put her hand over her mouth as she laughed. A moment later Bella was crying even as our daughter shifted in her arms.

"Will you sit with me on this ugly little sofa?"

When she nodded, I helped her stand; pulling the IV post while I made sure the tubing didn't get tangled. Once I was seated, Bella settled next to me, leaning against my left side as I put my arm around her. Our daughter continued to sleep, and from this angle I could see most of her face. "How did I miss it?"

"No heartbeat. You left before that would have started."

"Are you cold?"

"A little, but don't get up. I feel like your arm is the only thing holding me together. I've been strong for so long. I have to be, but after this, after her getting so sick. Crap, I stink don't I?"

"Never, to me."

Bella lifted her head and turned so she could see me. Her eyebrows drew upward. "You have to be joking. She threw up all over me."

Our daughter shifted and both of us focused on her. We had a daughter, I was a father. Carlie lifted her head away from Bella's chest, looking at her first before turning her head to look at me. The eyes that were peering up at me for just a brief moment before her head lowered back against Bella's chest, were mine. My eyes had been the same shade of green according to Carlisle. Bella kissed the top of Carlie's head whispering to her, that I was her daddy. Alice had said our baby was sixteen months old. Given the time I had been away, something wasn't adding up. There was no doubt in my mind that Carlie was my child, and the only explanation was that Bella had given birth to her very prematurely.

"She's so tired."

"How are you?"

"Tired, but I don't want to sleep."

"Even if I promise not to leave either of you?"

Her head shook. "I feel like this is one of my dreams. I used to dream so vividly that you were there. When she was born, it was four months and three days before her due date. They flew me to Children's Hospital up in Seattle and she was delivered there. Those long first days, I would dose off and dream that you came back. Sometimes I dreamed that you never left."

"I should have stayed."

"You will never, ever, try and decide for me again." There was a hint of anger in her voice, and I just held on to her hoping she would let me stay.

Over the next few hours, Carlie woke up a few times for Bella to nurse her. The first time Bella fed her I had been prepared to give her some privacy. "Stay with us," she told me. There was a sort of desperation in her voice, and the times they would both sleep with Bella still in my arms, I had to wonder what else had happened in my absence. The two heartbeats of Bella and my daughter soothed me, and if I'd been able to sleep with them, I would have.

The slight drop in Carlie's heartbeat was sudden, and was not something that should be happening. "Bella?"

"Hmm?"

"Wake her up."

"She needs to sleep."

"Trust me, please wake her up now."

Even though she was confused, Bella rubbed Carlie's back right as her heart rate began to plummet. "I need you to trust me more than you ever have."

"I do."

Drawing my arm away from Bella, I removed Carlie from her arms and cradled her in my left arm. Bella's eyes widened as I began to rub Carlie's chest, my gaze shot to her. "Trust me."

Bella gasped putting her hand over her mouth as I took two of my fingers pushing in between Carlie's nipples at a quick rate. Her heart beat began to stabilize. Carlie's lips were a little blue, but her mouth opened as she drew in a breath before she started to cry. For the first time in my life, I was grateful for my medical training, having never put it to use until this moment. Her cries were labored and knowing we needed help, I got up and pulled Bella with me.

"Her heart rate dropped, she needs oxygen, and they need to look at her." There was no response from Bella while I walked to the door holding her hand as a nurse saw us and came running.

Several hours later, we were back in our room. Carlie was stable, hooked up to heart monitors and oxygen as she slept in my left arm. To be sure she didn't get cold, Bella had wrapped a blanket around her. In the small bathroom, the shower was running, and my sister was reassuring Bella that our daughter was still sleeping in my arms.

The moment I heard Carlisle's thoughts telling me he was pulling into a parking spot, was the moment I had been waiting for. The on-call doctor was mystified why Carlie's heart had dropped so drastically, and there was too much that I didn't know to try and guess what was going on with her little body.

"Hi." Bella had on a pair of jeans and a baggy shirt. Behind her Alice had already discarded the hospital gown.

"Do you feel better?"

"Clean, I won't feel better until she's back to her normal happy self."

"Would it help you to know that Carlisle is on his way up to see us?"

Bella let out a deep breath. "If he tells us I can get her out of here."

After Bella was sitting next to me, I turned to her, careful with the wires and tubes as I put Carlie back in Bella's arms.

My father knocked once before he opened the door. His thoughts to me were ones of anger and frustration, something I deserved. I had never let any of them know about that day in the meadow. Evidently, Carlisle was aware that a human female could carry a child created by one of us. I'd be getting a talk later.

"Bella, I'm very sorry that it took me so long to arrive."

"You're here now. Than is all that matters. This is Carlie."

Carlisle looked down at her, assessing her without the need of any stethoscope. He reached out putting his wrist against her head causing Carlie to whimper.

"What is her normal temperature?"

"97.6. She didn't have any sort of seizure with her temperature being so high. Doctor Sands was worried about that when we got here. The only thing they gave her was something to help her tummy settle because she had been dry heaving. Alice has been keeping track of anything being filed."

"She's filled me in on most of what has gone on since Carlie got here." My father looked at me and Alice as she stood off to the side. For Bella's benefit, he spoke what he was thinking. "What happened when her heart rate went down? Did they give her anything before hand?"

"Nothing. Bella nursed her maybe a half hour before I started to notice it. At first it was slight. I told Bella to wake her. The next minute it was down very low. I had to massage her chest." As I answered my father's questions, Bella took my hand whether for my comfort or her own, I wasn't sure.

Carlisle was already thinking about our daughter's diet. He asked Bella what her normal diet was like. He was listening to her as I was about how picky Carlie had always been. Bella also shared that it was the reason she still nursed the baby, to make sure Carlie got enough nourishment.

"Has anyone taken a sample of her blood?"

Next to me Bella stiffened before shaking her head. Carlisle noticed. "The only way I can try and figure out what is happening is to get a sample of her blood. If I had any other way, I would try that."

"I know. I'm just glad it's you." When he left to get what he needed, Bella sighed. "What is he thinking?"

"He thinks there is a chance that Carlie needs blood as part of her diet." As much as I wanted to protect Bella, if I tried by not telling her, it would only be taking a step backward.

"What will happen to her?"

"If this is what she needs, she will get better. Since Carlie has survived on your milk, and on regular food, I think that is going to remain the same. I don't think that it will affect her in any other way than just to get her well."

We were quiet for a time, both of us watching our baby sleep in Bella's arms. "When she was born, I kept wondering if she would need that, and how I would get some. She thrived without it for so long. I hate this. All of her life I've been able to take care of her. Now, I can't. Edward, I need some space for right now."

It hurt the moment I stood up and wasn't touching Bella. When I looked at her, she turned her head away. Out in the hallway, I leaned against the wall next to the door as a nurse walked in to take Carlie's blood. It would be easy for me to think the way I once had, that if Bella would just love a human man, her life would be normal. Now, we were beyond that. Even with her not wanting me there, at the moment, I had a part in all of this and a responsibility to both of them.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

My thoughts had been so distracting, I hadn't even noticed Charlie approaching. "I'm here with Carlisle."

"He can be here. You get the hell out. Do you know what you did to her? Do you know how many months she spent sitting in her room not talking, not eating, along with missing a month of school. I have the mind to throw your rich little ass in jail, and don't think I can't."

The door to Carlie's room opened and Bella came out hugging her father. "Come see Carlie."

For a second Bella's dad was considering taking me downtown. She didn't look at me as she went back inside the room just as the nurse walked out, closing the door behind them. Charlie's thoughts and what I saw in them had me slumping down the wall. I saw Bella sitting in a chair in her room staring lifelessly out of her window. Other times she would scream until Charlie was at her bedside waking her up. He and Renee had worried they would have to hospitalize her. When an image of her in the arms of Ephraim Black's great grandson drifted into my mind, I shut my eyes. Bella's body was battered and bruised. She had been lost in the forest for several days, a month before she gave birth to Carlie. That was what Charlie had been told by those in the Pack who had found her. The need to find Jacob Black and get him to tell me the real reason almost had me on my feet.

"Carlie is severely anemic." This was the second time I'd failed to hear someone approaching me.

Carlisle offered me his hand and I took it, even though I didn't really need the help. "From what I saw of Alice's thoughts, Carlie didn't show any signs." My voice was so low, only my father could hear me.

"Her aversion to normal food is part of this."

"What about Bella nursing her?"

"If she would have chosen not too, I doubt they would have gotten to take her home as early as they did. I'll go talk to them."

He knocked on the door, and as he stepped inside, Alice walked out and hugged me. I put my arms around her needing the support she offered in form of her hug.

"Do you want to walk with me?"

"No, even if she doesn't want me in there, I can't go any further away from her than this."

My sister rested her head against my chest. "Charlie promised not to arrest you. I told him Carlisle was going to have words with you along with our mother. He smiled when I said that."

I chuckled as Alice stepped away from me. "I deserved whatever he wanted to throw out at me. I must admit that I'm grateful for the No Gun Policy."

She giggled. "Hopefully…Edward no."

The moment she giggled, I not only smelled Werewolf, I heard him. Jacob Black's thoughts were focused on not phasing in the lobby of the hospital as I made my way to the elevator. Alice kept pace behind me. I needed to know what happened to Bella, why she had been broken in his arms.

When we reached the lobby, he glared at me. The only part of his body shaking was his hand. The images of Bella's bruised, battered body flooded into my mind. Another image of her in the arms of another member of his pack being brought out of the woods the day I left her nearly drove me to my knees. As Jacob Black realized that I was tapping into his mind, he stopped trembling and opened up completely.

The things I saw would have stopped my heart beating if it would have been possible. In our meadow Bella watched the wolves chase Laurent into the woods, after he told her she was with child. The pack searching every stretch of land from here into Canada before they found the cabin where Victoria was keeping Bella. Jake phasing into his human form when he saw her tied to a bed with metal bracelets on her wrists and ankles. There were shallow cuts all over her arms and legs. Her lips were swollen and cracked and her left cheek bruised from a hit. Jake phasing back into a wolf when his pack was fighting Victoria. His relief at getting to sever her head from her body and watch her burn. Jacob Black kissing Bella right before she shoved him away.

My eyes narrowed on him as he did his best to cover that particular thought. Alice was holding my hand and only a few seconds had passed by. "Thank you for saving them."

"I didn't do any of it for you. They don't need you. She's been doing just fine without you here."

"And our daughter nearly went into cardiac arrest twice. Both times I was more than needed."

The second Jacob heard my words, he slumped a little. "Tell your council that we are staying as long as Bella wants us here."

Inside the elevator, Alice moved into my vision. "What did he show you."

My head shook, "Not now." More than anything I wanted a way to reverse time to the point where Bella and I were in the woods. That moment when I kissed her, I very nearly pulled her into my arms to tell her I was lying to her, that I was terrified of Bella being like me, a monster. The damage had been done, and as I stood back by the door to her room, the urge to go in and hold Bella in my arms was almost too much for me to control. How she had been able to get through it and be able to also come through raising our daughter all of this time without becoming unhinged was a true miracle. There had been times in my life, after I joined Carlisle, when we would debate over religion. Before now I hadn't put too much stock into God. With the thoughts I'd seen from Jacob, my ideals were quickly changing.

Carlisle approaching the door along with Charlie drew my attention to them. My father stepped out first followed by Charlie, who walked quickly towards the waiting room. "Bella wants to see you." Before leaving in the direction Charlie had taken, my father put his hand on my shoulder.

"You'll need to contact Billy Black. His son has taken up the responsibility." Carlisle nodded and I went into Carlie's room.

On that same little sofa, Bella was watching me while feeding our daughter. "I'm sorry I sent you out earlier. All of this is just so frustrating. I guess I needed someone to blame."

When I got to her side, Bella patted the free space beside her, what little of it there was. "May I tell you I'm sorry?"

Her head shook. "I know that you are, and I know that you are sincere. She's been anemic for a while now. I never noticed it. We always thought that her being a picky eater was just being picky. Charlie said I was like that. Do you know how this is all going to work, with the blood I mean?"

"Carlisle wants to start this slowly. Even though her body needs the iron and other nutrients that this will provide, too much at once will be just as harmful."

"My dad thinks it's just going to be supplements. Carlisle said it would be, but I know he couldn't say anything like that."

"The best way is to feed it to her. In his thoughts he was thinking about starting her on an ounce every hour after you nurse her."

Bella nodded.

"Will you let me hold you?"

"Yes."

When I put my left arm around her, Bella shifted turning until her back was mostly pressed up against my chest. Carlie's eyes were shut as she continued to nurse.

"I'm not sure why I got so upset about all of this. I knew that someday she would need a change in her diet."

"Maybe because she's so young?"

"I think so. I'm sort of a control freak when it comes to her. Man she's going to hate it when she's older and wants to run off with her friends. I'll be calling her every five minutes." Bella paused. "Will she be able to be around other children?"

That was a good question and one which I had no answer for. "I hope she will."

As Bella leaned her head against my neck, I rested my chin gently on top of her hair. "So do I."

**Author's Notes:** _Welcome if you are new to this story and to me as a writer of fanfic. Thank you for choosing my story to read. To my seasoned readers, you guys are totally rocking awesome. 28 reviews thus far, Lots and lots of adds to favs lists and alerts. I can't tell you how much I appreciated the reviews and I hope this chapter answered some questions._

_If Bella seemed a little moody, don't be too hard on that. She knew Carlie might need blood, and that she can't be the one to help with that, at this point in time, it's really difficult for her. _

_Thanks again._


	6. Trust

**Chapter 6: Trust**

**Edward**

_This chapter contains explicit content_

_of the time Bella was held captive by_

_Victoria. Some of what you_

_read might be upsetting_.

Two days had gone by since Carlie had begun receiving donated human blood in her sippy cup. There were already signs that the blood was helping her. Carlie's temperature was below 100, but not at the normal range Bella had mentioned. Her heart rate was steady and strong. Carlie was also venturing away from Bella's lap to explore her room. The improvement was not just Carlie, but also Bella. There were more smiles from her as our daughter continued to improve. She was seeing the benefit of what the blood was doing for our baby.

For me, seeing Bella smile was a relief, though I still had concerns about what I had read in Charlie's memories, along with Jacob's. Had Bella been able to really deal with the things that happened to her when she was held captive. Was Carlie's premature birth a result of the torture inflicted on Bella?" Was it better to leave all of that in the past? Carlisle needed to know these things, but not without Bella's consent. All of those thoughts were on my mind as I sat in the waiting room. Charlie was visiting with Bella and the baby, and for the time being the less he saw me, the easier it was on Bella.

When we were alone together in Carlie's hospital room, Bella confessed that she was at a loss on how to handle his reaction to me being back. Evidently they had argued a lot about that very thing. My guilt at causing the rift between them was adding to the guilt I had for going away.

Carlisle's thoughts on his most recent exam of Carlie were positive. They also alerted me of his approach. I glanced at the entry of the waiting room as he stepped in. He sat down next to me. "She does better with each day. I was thinking of sending them home on Friday."

"I think Bella will be relieved."

"What about you?"

The many years we had lived together, Carlisle had come to know my moods fairly well. It was rare I could hide my emotion from him, the change in the tone of my voice, giving away when I was worried or upset. "It will be good for them to get home. Carlie is more aware than ever that she's in a strange place, and hasn't been sleeping well. Neither has Bella for that matter. She's having a difficult time with Charlie and his discomfort having me back in her life."

_While I understand why you had us leave that way, I can also understand how Charlie must feel. We still need to talk, Edward. _Carlisle stood up patting my shoulder before he left to check on my daughter.

So far, Carlie was shy around me. As long as I sat on the sofa and she didn't catch me watching her, she was more than happy to mill around the room. Bella usually sat on the floor against the sofa, or walked with her if she got far enough away. Any time I got up or Carlie caught me looking, she would instantly toddle to Bella and hide her face against her mother's chest. I wanted her to get to know me, and to trust that I was there to take care of her and love her, just as her mother and Charlie did. All of that was going to take time.

_At least we get to take her home in two days. Carlisle is a miracle worker. Wish that son of his would go back where he was staying. Bella is doing just fine without him around._ The thoughts coming from Charlie along with his foot fall as he approached and then went by the waiting room on his way out of the hospital, alerted me that I could go back to Carlie's room. His trust was something else I wanted to earn if I could. Time was the only thing that would help that.

The moment I walked out of the waiting room, I heard Carlie crying along with Bella reassuring her that she was safe, and that Carlisle was almost done. At the door I waited, hearing from Carlisle's thoughts that she was sounding better, and that her reflexes were nearly normal. My father wanted on a developmental standpoint, to see what was normal for Carlie. He also thought of the only vampire-human child he had met. It had been shortly before he traveled to America, not long after leaving the Volturi.

The door opened as the crying stopped. Carlisle nodded at me before he headed down to the labs to check Carlie's blood sample. Aside from needing blood, how much was she really like one of us? It seemed like for the moment Carlie was more genetically dominate on her human side. In her room, Bella was sitting in the rocking chair one of the nurses brought in earlier this morning, cradling Carlie in her arms as our baby nursed.

Carlie had a slight hitch in her breathing from crying earlier, and I felt a powerful need to protect her, even though she wasn't in any danger. After shutting the door, I moved over to the sofa and sat down facing them. "How was Charlie's visit?"

"Good. He's ready for us to get back to the house." Bella frowned. "Lately I feel like it's just so he can try and keep us away from you. I need to just tell him that you being a part of my life and Carlie's is the new reality that he needs to get used to. At the same time he's paying for all of Carlie's medical bills from when she was born, and now this. I feel like I would be disrespecting him by saying anything at all."

"Do you really feel that if you did say something like that, he would hold that over your head?"

She sighed, glancing down at our little girl. "No. I think he would be hurt, and worried. He just doesn't understand why this is so important to me. Since you left, I've changed. There were a lot of things that opened my eyes, made me realize that I had to look out for myself and when she was born, Carlie. Now that you're back, and because my dad is probably going to get married to Sue, I don't know."

After a moment, mulling over what Bella said, I stood and walked over to her, kneeling down beside the rocking chair. I reached up and put my hand on hers. "What don't you know?"

There was a moment of hesitation, before she answered. "I don't know how much longer I can keep being strong. When I fell apart, when you left, I closed up. It was the only way I could deal with all of the pain. It hurt so much Edward." Bella bit her bottom lip, before going on. "I got reckless after a while too." She told me about having Jake rebuild some dirt bikes getting ready to go to the dump. How she had Jake teach her to ride one of them just so she could hear my voice.

"The worst of it was that day when I hiked to our meadow. I didn't think I would find it, but finally I was in the clearing and the hole in my chest tore open."

Bella was in the moment, not noticing that Carlie had drifted to sleep. She stopped briefly as I eased my arms under our little girl, shifting her against my chest. When Carlie was asleep, especially after Bella nursed her, she didn't seem to mind me holding her, or didn't seem to realize that it was me."

At the crib, I shifted her from my chest to the mattress putting the blanket Bella had Charlie bring over her small body, while taking her security blanket from the end of the bed, laying it against her small hand.

In the rocking chair Bella was wiping her eyes. When I moved back in front of her and reached out, Bella took my hand and came into my arms.

"Laurent found me there. He was happy to see me. I was happy to see him until realizing that his eyes were red. Victoria sent him to see if you were still protecting me. He was going to kill me, Edward. As that was about to happen, he just stopped, looking down at my stomach. He said I was with child, before he started laughing. Suddenly he stopped and he took off. These giant wolves came into our meadow and went after him. My mind woke up from the haze I'd been in because it was such a surprise, such a huge shock. He couldn't have known. That's what I thought later, because you left not knowing. After thinking about it, I knew it was because you didn't hear a heartbeat and Laurent must have. A week later, she found me. I was in the forest just a little way in back of the house. Victoria grabbed me by the neck and threw me."

Bella's breathing hitched and I held her closer to me, my eyes shut as she kept going. "When I woke up it was to stinging pain all up and down my arms and legs. Victoria came into my vision smiling before she lowered her head and kissed my stomach. I got sick on her, and she smacked my face. She used her finger nails to draw my blood over and over again. She said she was going to slowly drain my blood, at first. Later she said she was going to keep me alive long enough for my baby to be born. She wanted me to watch her bite into Carlie's neck." Bella grasped my shirt. "I told her she would never lay hands on my baby, that I would kill her first. Edward, she left then. I thought she was going to just give up. When she came back much later, she had a baby, a tiny helpless baby. She slit her fingernail down his little throat as he gurgled and screamed before she began sucking his blood."

Her cries were muffled into my chest and more than anything I wished I could kill Victoria. Had Jake known about any of this? How well had Bella managed to hide all of this? She trusted me not to overreact. That was what she had meant that first day, when she had me promise all of those things to her.

I guided her to the sofa and sat down holding her as she continued to sob into my shirt. "Let it all out Bella. You've been so brave. You are brave, but you don't have to hold onto this now." Her hands grasped tighter to my shirt as she cried harder. In her crib, Carlie continued to sleep. It really was a miracle that she was here in this room with us. Sometime later, Bella's cries began to soften, before they stopped altogether. Even though they had, she still clung to me.

"Will you let me talk to Carlisle about this?"

Her head nodded once as she drew in a heaving breath.

"I also want to take you and Carlie to my family's home. Alice is going to go back to Alaska to be with Jasper. She hasn't said anything about Carlie, and she promised she won't until you are ready for that. I want the chance to talk to your father. Not about what you just told me, but because I need him to know my commitment to keeping you and Carlie safe and provided for. Right now I want you to let me help. I know how strong you have been Bella, but I want to take responsibility for Carlie, and for what my leaving did to you."

For a long while she remained as she was, clutching at my shirt even after her breathing had evened out. No wonder she had sent me out of the room after finding out Carlie would need blood. For the entire sixteen months of our daughter's life and as she carried Carlie four months before her birth, Bella had been the one to take care of our baby. How overwhelming it had to be to know that at that time there was nothing she could do to help Carlie. Also, Bella had held on to the memory of Victoria holding her captive, threatening our daughter's life. It was amazing that she had managed to take a semester of school being away from Carlie.

"Thank you." Bella lifted her head looking up at me.

"You don't need to thank me. Do you feel comfortable staying with me?"

She nodded. "No one else knows about the baby. That could have been Carlie."

"But it wasn't, and you need to hold onto that fact, Bella."

"I have been, for so long. I want to talk to Charlie too. We both need to do that. You need to know that I've got a lot to work through. Living at your house is something I want, but I need you to follow my lead. Don't hover. And if I snap at you, I don't mean too."

She let me draw her back into my arms. "I'll do what you need me too. Will you let me pay for this hospital visit?"

"Can we discuss that later?"

"Absolutely."

Talking to Charlie the next morning wasn't easy for Bella. She had put Carlie on his lap, which I thought was a great idea. I walked in at that point and though in his thoughts he was yelling at me, our daughter prevented him from saying a word as Bella told him that she was taking Carlie to stay with me and my father. When she finished talking, she sat next to her father.

"Charlie, I want to apologize for leaving Bella the way I did. There is no excuse for not preparing her for that, and at the time I was very selfish, thinking of myself and not what leaving would do to her. Finding out that I left her pregnant is unspeakable, and I know that you just want to keep her safe. I want that too, not only for Bella but for our little girl."

As I kept talking, Carlie slowly peered at me. "Carlisle and Esme have agreed to them coming to stay with me, but only if Bella stays in a separate room with our baby. He also wants to pay for Carlie's stay in the hospital." I felt adding that we would be staying in separate rooms would ease his mind. Charlie seemed to be fairly traditional in the view that we shouldn't sleep together until I made a commitment to being married to his daughter, even though we had already been together that one time.

Charlie put his granddaughter into Bella's arms before he stood up, turning to face her. "Is this really what you want?"

Bella nodded. "It is. We need to figure things out, and truthfully, being with them means more medical care for Carlie if she needs it."

"If you don't like being there, you still have a room at my place." After giving them a kiss, he turned and faced me. "Please take care of them. I'm going to trust my daughter's judgment. I promise you that if you ever hurt them again, I will hunt you down."

"Dad!"

Charlie looked into my eyes as I promised him that I would take her lead, giving her the help and the space she wanted. After he was gone, I sat down on the floor. A moment later, Bella was sitting across from me. On her lap, Carlie was watching.

"That was not nearly as hard as I thought it would be," Bella said.

"He wants to see you happy."

"I think every parent wants that for their kid."

Our daughter slid to the edge of her mother's lap before she was on her feet, looking right at me. When I held out my hands, she glanced at them a moment before she plopped back down on Bella's lap, turning until her face was pressed against her mother's chest.

"Almost," I said.

Bella smiled.

In the evening, when Charlie came back to have dinner with his girls, I took my leave. Alice had phoned to tell me that she and Carlisle were getting my room ready for Bella and Carlie. When I got to the house, my sister greeted me at the door. "It's ready." She grabbed my hand and I let her pull me up three flights of stairs to my room. All of my old things were still there. The additional pieces of furniture were a sleigh crib, which Alice had set up in front of the glass doors directly across from the entry to my room, and a queen bed which was flush against the wall with the book shelves pushed against the edges of the bed. It was in the middle of my room leaving a few feet between the end of the bed and the glass wall that looked on the outside.

"The sun might be too much."

My sister handed me a remote. When I pushed the single button, darkening shades moved down all the windows including the doors. The fabric was a dark mesh and would keep the sun out for naps and in the morning if Bella and Carlie wanted to sleep in. "Thank you Alice."

"I'm not done yet." Once again she had my hand, leading me down the hall to the closed door of the only spare room we had in the house. When she opened the door, what I found inside was amazing. The room, which had once held odds and ends of things like old paintings, and pots, along with statues and parts of an old chest of drawers, now had in it all sorts of toys. Against the far wall was a little stove with plastic pots and pans ready for Carlie to cook. In the center of the room was a round table with a plastic tea set on the surface. Just inside the door to the left was an old wardrobe. Inside were some of Carlie's clothes Alice had brought home to wash. There was also a brand new dress. From Alice's thoughts, I knew Bella had approved.

"The rest came from a thrift store, well not the bed and the crib, but that stove and the table and everything else. Bella said she gets great bargains. She's right."

"Thank you for listening to her."

"She's my friend, and she needs us to follow her lead. Now, I need to finish getting ready."

Before she could leave, I reached out and took her hand. "Alice, thank you for everything. Thank you for not listening to me and following your vision." We shared a hug.

As she started down the stairs, she called out, "When have I ever listened to you?

When I got back to Bella and Carlie, our little girl had a damp head of hair from an earlier bath, and was dressed in a long sleeved night gown. They were on the sofa, with Carlie settled in Bella's lap looking at a book. In Carlie's arms was a fluffy white stuffed bunny. Our little girl watched me closely as I walked over to them. As I sat down, she kept looking at me until Bella patted the book.

"Can you tell your daddy what this is?"

"No no." Carlie shoved the book away as she began to struggle in Bella's arms, just as she had done last night. Carlie was starting to associate my returns with bedtime, or so it seemed as she began to fuss. On the floor to my left was another book. It was the story of **The Velveteen Rabbit**. For a moment as I picked it up and began to read, Carlie continued to struggle in Bella's arms. Finally she realized that I had a book, and let Bella cradle her in her arms so that she could see me while I told her the story. After reading a page, I would turn the book so Carlie could see the pictures. The further into the story I read, the sleepier our angel became. I finished reading before she was ready to sleep, and while shutting the book, I began to hum the lullaby I had once written for Bella. A few minutes later, Carlie was asleep. Bella had her eyes shut, but from the sound of her breathing I knew she was just resting her eyes.

"I missed this."

"Your song?"

"Yes. I enjoyed you reading to her."

"It seems as though she liked that as well. Do you want me to put her in the crib?"

"No, I need her in my arms. I know that sounds a little selfish."

"Wanting to hold her isn't selfish. If she would let me, I would do the same thing."

Bella opened her eyes. "Will you grab her blankets for me?"

After they were covered up, with Bella resting the length of the couch as best she could, I bent my head down and kissed her forehead. The pillow from the hospital bed was on my lap with Bella's head against it. Settled on her chest, Carlie was sleeping without a care in the world. Once they were comfortable I began to hum my lullaby, again keeping up the soft tones even as Bella fell into a sound sleep.

The afternoon finally arrived for us to leave Forks Hospital behind. Bella had signed all the release papers, while Charlie dressed Carlie in a pair of jeans and a purple shirt with little bunny's printed across the front. He was driving them out to the house, letting me lead the way. From his thoughts, I found that he didn't trust me to keep my word about separate rooms. He had no idea how many rooms our house held. Offering to let him come see where they would be living eased his worries, though only slightly.

When everyone was settled in the cruiser, I got in my car, the same Volvo I'd had before leaving Forks and Bella behind. On the journey, I kept to the exact speed limit. At the stop signs I came to a full stop, making it a point to look in all directions before I would get the car going again. Just as we pulled up in front of our house, it began to drizzle. It wasn't easy moving the way a human would to get to the cruiser with my umbrella, especially since I could move much quicker. While Charlie carried the baby, holding his own umbrella, Bella and I walked in front of them with the umbrella we were sharing.

At the door, Carlisle was there to greet us along with Esme, who had just arrived late last night. Once we were all inside, my mother gave Bella a hug. Bella had agreed that it would seem odd to Charlie if she wasn't present, and Esme had traveled here by foot so that she could arrive on time. "Bella, it is so great to see you." Esme said

Carlisle had taken the rain coat that Charlie had removed from my little girl while she hid her face in his chest. Once Esme finished hugging Bella, she moved to stand next to Carlisle, offering to take Charlie on a tour. Bella reached out and took Carlie from him, and a moment later it was just the three of us.

"I forgot how huge this house is."

"It fits well for a large family like our own. Do you want to sit down?" When she nodded, I led her into our large front room, guiding Bella to one of our white sofas. We sat together while Bella glanced around. In her arms, Carlie took a few glances around, hiding when she saw me sitting next to them.

"Do you want to see your room?"

"Yes."

On the way up to the third floor, we passed Carlisle, Esme and Charlie. Bella's father wasn't saying much, not even in his thoughts while Esme kept up the tour, leading him to the second floor.

"I wonder if Charlie is overwhelmed. I remember feeling that way when we came here the first time. It really is beautiful."

It was comforting to know Bella felt that way about the house. My hope was that she would feel safe here with us, as well as our daughter. First we went to my old room. Just inside the door Bella remained where she was, taking everything in. "Wow."

"Alice," I said as I moved past them, walking to the crib. My sister had left a stuffed cat there. After picking it up, I wound him. The tune he played was **Somewhere over the Rainbow**.

The sound of the music drew Carlie's attention to me as I went back to them. She looked at the cat a moment before she was reaching for it. Once she had her new toy, our daughter rested her head against Bella's shoulder.

Across the hall, we went into the playroom. This time, Carlie struggled to be let down. Once on her feet, she toddled over to the fancy rocking horse that had once belonged to me, even though I could hardly remember it.

"This is beautiful. Where did Alice find him?"

"In Chicago. He was in storage with some of the other things from the house I grew up in. He belonged to me at one time."

The smile on Bella's face was my reward, along with Carlie's giggles as her momma helped her sit on the horse and rock. Seeing that her cat had been abandoned on the floor, I took him to her little tea table and put him down in one of the chairs. "Alice assures me the rest of these toys came from thrift shops."

"It's wonderful in here. I never thought about a room for putting all of her toys." After Carlie lost interest in the horse, Bella and I went downstairs to see how far along in the tour Charlie was with my parents. We found them back in the front room. As Bella sat down next to her father, Carlie reached for him, snuggling against his chest with her new friend.

"I can't thank you enough for showing me around. I've worried about the increasing amount of time I'm away from home, and I know they will be safe here with you all." As Charlie spoke he looked at Carlisle and Esme who were sitting on another sofa holding hands. I stood behind Bella and Charlie, keeping out of site.

As he took his leave of us, Bella stood at the door with Carlie, waving at him. I could tell by the way she held herself that she was tired, and was grateful that Carlisle and Esme left us space to be alone with one another, once the door was shut. Bella turned around looking at me. "Will you play for us?" She glanced at the piano, so I reached out taking her free hand in mine.

Once she was sitting on the bench, I settled to her left and began to play her lullaby first, before I started to glide my fingers over the ivory, changing the tune into something brand new. As I played, Bella settled Carlie in her lap, holding her arms and hands still while our daughter watched my fingers. Our baby yawned a few times as I finished my new piece. When I stopped she looked up at me and for the first time offered me a smile.

"I'm glad you liked that. I played it especially for you, Carlie."

Her eyes remained on me, before she leaned out. Bella nodded and I took her into my arms settling her on my lap as I gently took her hands. Carlie didn't protest as I moved both hands into fists, keeping her pointer fingers out before I helped her push down the keys to the tune of **Mary had a Little Lamb**.

After Carlie was down for a nap, Bella and I went back downstairs finding Esme in the main room putting new flowers in vases. She stopped when we arrived and came over to us, giving Bella another hug. "I am so happy you are staying with us."

Bella smiled. "I am too. I really missed seeing everyone."

"We missed you. Do you mind telling me about Carlie?"

While the two of them sat down to talk, I went to the other side of the house where Carlisle's office was. He told me to come in before I could even knock on the door. "I was hoping we would have time to talk," Carlisle said.

Once I was sitting down on a couch across from his desk, I shut my eyes drawing in a breath of air, even though I didn't need one. While Bella agreed that Carlisle should know about the events that took place while Victoria had held her captive, she didn't want to have to deal with retelling them. "Victoria came after Bella while we were gone. The wolves in Jacob's Pack had been chasing after her, not knowing that she was trying to get her hands on Bella. Laurent also made a return. Evidently he decided that he didn't want to follow our ways, and sided with Victoria. Bella took a hike to a meadow we both enjoyed visiting where he found her, ready to attack. What stopped him was that by that time he heard Carlie's heartbeat, or something else tipped him off she was pregnant. I don't know if he was able to tell that the baby wasn't entirely human.

Because of Jake and his pack, he was shortly disposed of. A week later, just beyond Bella's house in the woods, Victoria was able to take her." If it were possible to shed tears, I would have. As it was, I had to pause to compose myself. Next to me my father sat down. Carlisle put a hand on my shoulder. "What she did to Bella was unspeakable. At first, she used her long finger nails to slit Bella's arms and legs. She hit Bella in the face a few times, splitting her lip. My Bella fought as hard as she could, even telling Victoria that if she laid a hand on our baby, she would kill her.

As punishment, Bella told me that she came back later with a newborn child, killing the little boy in front of her by drinking his blood." My eyes opened as I turned to face my father. "I don't know how she managed to do all she has. She broke down when she told me. It's one of the reason's she is here. I want to help her, but I don't know how."

"You are starting on the right path by sharing this with me. She will need to talk to someone about what happened, someone who doesn't know her, and can be objective at helping her. Bella doesn't have to go into detail about Victoria, about the baby. She can tell them about the other things that happened to her. Having her stay with us is also a step in the right direction, and it seems she's willing to let you in."

"She is. Bella made me promise to give her space, and I plan on doing that as much as she needs. Do you have any idea who she can go talk to?"

Before telling me, Carlisle reached out and took my hand. "There is a counselor who visits some of the patients at the hospital. She is very good at what she does, and she would be the best person to help Bella."

"How was she able to handle all of this? She said she went into labor a month later."

"I'm sure having a baby born four months premature drowned out the events of her abduction. It doesn't mean she forgot them, and she does need to deal with what happened to her, so that she can be healthy both physically and mentally. Will she let me talk to her?"

I nodded. "You told me you knew a human could carry a child created from us?"

"Yes. I only met the one little boy. It was weeks before I left for America, in London. Actually, he tried picking my pocket. When I grasped his hand, he instantly realized what I was and began to fight me. I let him go, and followed him through the crowd, out of the city into the country. The house he ran into was small. Not long after he went inside, a woman came outside and sat on the small porch. I approached slowly, letting her see that I wasn't there to cause either of them any harm. She was as human as your Bella. When I arrived at her porch, she told me to sit down.

She met the boy's father one night at a brothel where she had been employed. The woman said he was quite the charmer, and came by every night wanting to see her. They would leave the brothel and go on walks. She said he would talk about his travels and the things he wanted to do with his life.

The one thing she noticed when they touched was how ice cold his hands were, though at the time she thought nothing of it. She said it was winter and she attributed it to that.

One night, he invited her to his room in a small inn a few miles from where she worked. She said that night was foggy in her mind. When she awoke the next morning the room was empty of his things. Seven months later she gave birth to her son."

"What was he like?"

"He was strong when he was trying to pull away from me, and I doubt I would have known he was taking something from my pocket had I not been what I am. His mother told me she was ashamed of how he took to provide for them, but due to her poor health, she didn't know of any other way to get the things he needed. I remember how strong his heart beat was. It was also beating slower than Carlie's. I took it upon myself to warn her of the Volturi, and informing her of what I was, though she already seemed to know that the man who gave her that boy, was a vampire. I gave her enough money to sustain them for a while, as well as to move from London, advising that she not allow the boy to continue being a pick pocket. To this day, I never knew what became of them, or if the Volturi ever found out that the union between us and human's was possible. Perhaps that is where the legends of the Cambrian come from."

Until Carlisle had brought them up, I hadn't even thought of the Volturi. "How long has it been since you heard from them?"

"Nineteen thirty two. Aro sent me an invitation to come celebrate the festival of St Marcus. I declined at the time. I would imagine he knows how large our family has become, but unless as you know, someone is careless, they are very content to stay in Italy. We will need to be careful with being seen out with Carlie until she grows much older. She could very well be mistaken as an Immortal Child."

The Immortal Children I was aware of due to Tanya's family. Our friends couldn't know about Carlie, as Carlisle said until she was much older.

After our talk, I found Esme in the front room alone, aware that three floors above us, Carlie and Bella were taking a nap. She was quiet as I walked past her, and sat down on the sofa Bella and Charlie had been on earlier. Esme kept working with the vases, putting in fresh cut flowers she had picked on her way home. In her mind, she was reciting a poem she loved, keeping her thoughts from me.

Finally, she walked over and sat down beside me folding her hands in front of her on her lap. "I tried not to listen as you were speaking to your father."

"Thank you."

"Sometimes I wish I had a way to see into the future as Alice does, or read minds the way you do. Carlisle could have prepared you for that day."

I took her left hand in mine. "It wasn't something I was even thinking about. When it happened, it was spontaneous and wonderful. Afterwards the guilt I felt was consuming to the point where I tried to pretend it hadn't happened at all. As you know, there wasn't any reason for me to believe that leaving wasn't in her best interest. I was very lucky that I didn't hurt her, and later, when I was alone, I thought of that many times. Alone, I realized that I could never hurt her. Even with my blood lust the way it was."

"What is it like for you having Carlie?"

The smile that spread across my lips was unavoidable. "Wonderful. Having her makes me feel alive. Now that she's starting to improve, I feel almost human again."

Esme smiled at me. "I am anxious to know her better, to know both of them and be a part of their lives."

"We will all have that chance, but Bella needs time to adjust."

"I know. I'm proud of you for what you have done. Bringing them here is the right thing."

Once we had spoken, I went quietly upstairs to my old room. I'd promised Charlie separate rooms. I wasn't going to break my promise on that meaning. However, the need to hold Bella in my arms while she slept was powerful. I climbed in bed on the free side without waking her or our daughter as Carlie slept snuggled against Bella's chest. Once I was resting on my side behind her, I shut my eyes letting their breathing lull me. This was a new beginning for us all, and I was ready to do my part to insure they both were kept safe.


	7. Time

**Chapter 7: Time**

**Bella**

The dark musty smell of the cabin filled my nostrils, along with other unpleasant scents all coming from me. Time had no meaning as I lay chained to a bed by my ankles and wrists. My arms and legs felt like someone had lit a fire on me. I was also cold. My head hurt and my lips were dry. Her laughter filled my ears before Victoria was standing beside my head. The baby's cry as she bit into his neck grew louder and louder.

"Bella."

Suddenly I was awake, my eyes focusing on Carlie as she reached for me from Edward's arms. My heart beat was fast and erratic. For a moment I still felt I was in that cabin. Once I had Carlie in my arms she began to calm down. The dreams hadn't come in such a long time. It was almost like leaving Charlie's had caused them to come back. On auto pilot, I began to rock my daughter, glad when she stopped crying. At the foot of the bed, Edward stayed where he was, waiting, watching. It felt like he was there just to see me fall apart. That wasn't fair to him. Lately all the dreams I'd been having seemed to be making me more irrational. When Carlie was asleep again I turned, putting her in the middle of the bed.

"Say something."

Edward was still sitting there, and I didn't want to look at him. "What can I do to help you?"

"Go back in time and trust me to make my own choices. I don't know what I want you to do. It feels like your there waiting for me to just fall apart. I hate this." Finally I turned to face him. "I was doing fine. Carlie was catching up. That time with Victoria was locked away in my mind. Now I keep asking why it was necessary to bring it all up again. The dreams I'm having, it's just like being back in that cabin. Right now it feels like we are just playing house with Carlie. It's like being in one of those glass balls with the snow. The ones you shake and send snow flying in the air. Here it feels like we could just pretend like everything was a dream. Now that Carlie's getting better, I'm seeing things for what they are. You left, and the things you said hurt me. I feel like I'm taking five steps back now from where we were when we got here. I know Carlisle thinks I should talk to that woman, but what is the use of doing that if I can't tell her everything that went on. Also there are things I need to figure out about you and me."

He had his eyes on me the whole time. Once I finished talking, he began. "Leaving was a mistake. No, not letting you have a say in things was the mistake. Never once did I think of asking you what you thought after Jasper attacked. It should have been the first thing I did after we left the house. I never asked you if you were afraid of him, and even of me. My mind was on keeping you safe, but it should have been on finding out what we should do next."

"How do I know you won't resort back to that, if something else tries to cause me harm, or Carlie. The other question is if you would have come back if there was no baby. If Alice saw me in the airport and everything had gone the same, her being back with me, would you have come back if she would have told you?" It was evident that he wanted to sit closer to me, maybe even hold me like he had been doing when we talked. Tonight, I just needed some answers.

"It may have been longer before my return. Now that I'm here, I know how much of a mistake that would have been. Carlie brought me here, yes. Now that you have shared with me about Victoria, and Laurent, I want the chance to be here for you over anything else."

His words brought some reassurance to my sleep deprived brain. Slowly I crawled over to him, moving into his lap to let him hold me. "Do you feel like you're living with a yo-yo? Like any moment you're going to get whiplash from my mood swings?"

Edward smiled at me. "Vampire," he pointed out.

"Is there a way I could just talk to Carlisle? I know he says I need someone who can be objective, but why can't he?"

Edward was silent for just a second. "He could if that is what you are comfortable with. His point of suggesting the woman was that she is human. He thought you might not want to talk to him because of who he is."

His admission to Carlisle's reasoning was a surprise, but only for a moment. Given that it had been two vampires who had put my life and that of Carlie's in danger, I saw and understood why he'd suggested her. "He would understand better than most about Victoria and maybe what drove her to do what she did. Her actions were to punish both of us."

"I'd like to punish her." His eyes darkened but didn't frighten me.

I reached up, placing my hand on his cheek. "I think she got what she deserved." At that moment a yawn escaped my lips. Edward held me closer, and I wasn't chilled because they had the heat on even though it was in the middle of summer.

A small hand patting my cheeks was the next thing to wake me. My eyes opened to my angel resting with her head on the same pillow mine was on, her green eyes looking right into mine. "Good morning, sweet baby."

"Ma." Carlie patted my cheek, smiling at me. She looked like she had slept well, even thought my dream must have been the cause to her waking up. Did I say something or scream in my sleep? Or had she picked up on the fear that gripped me being back in that cabin. My little girl snuggled closer to me grasping my nose, laughing when I made snorting sound. I'd missed this when we were in the hospital. Waking up in the morning to see her smiling face and play and snuggle with her, it was what kept me going. A moment later as she rested at my side nursing, I pondered over that. If she wasn't here, if she never would have been born, how would I have dealt with everything that happened? Realization hit me that I never had done that. Living with Charlie, my soul focus had been on this beautiful baby in my arms. Everything had been about her at first. Later, it had been taking classes to get my GED, then on to college courses.

Downstairs, Esme greeted us from the kitchen. "What can I fix for you?"

Carlie was back to hiding her face against my chest, and I rubbed my hand up and down her back. "Scrambled eggs, but I can make them."

She smiled, nodding, but there had been a flicker of something that passed on her face. "On second thought, my arms are kind of full. Where is Edward?"

As Esme went to work explaining that he had gone hunting with Carlisle, I sat down at the table with Carlie. Today, when they got back, I needed to see if Carlisle would let me talk to him. It really was time for me to begin to deal with my life as it had happened over the past two and a half years. Carlie lifted her head away from my chest, glancing at me first before she spotted Esme to our left making breakfast. Esme was humming softly, and Carlie kept looking her way.

When she finished with my eggs, Esme came over to the table, just as I turned Carlie so she could sit on my lap. "Do you mind if I sit with you?"

"Please do, and thank you for making breakfast." While I took my first bite of eggs, Esme handed Carlie a small spoon. My little girl examined it, seeing my spoon in my hands. Her little hand moved in attempt to get some of the egg, though she wasn't too successful until I helped her. The rest she did on her own, able to guide the spoon until she had it in her mouth. In the next moment, Carlie began shoving eggs from my plate.

"I'm sorry," Esme started, but I shook my head as I stilled the little hand in front of me. "Actually, if you don't mind letting her sit on your lap, that would be a big help."

When I lifted Carlie up, she was a little hesitant at first as Esme took her. Once my daughter realized that I wasn't going anywhere, and that I was now offering her some of my eggs, she settled back on Esme's lap chewing her food.

"She is so beautiful. I realize that I've said that many times, but she truly is a part of you and Edward."

After giving Carlie another bite of egg, I smiled. "I don't mind that you've said it more than once. I think about how wonderful she is all the time. I'm glad she has his eyes. In a way it helped to look into them, seeing a part of him."

My baby reached for me and once she was in my arms, she shifted, wanting to nurse. Instead, I got her distracted while Esme went to prepare some blood in her sippy cup. Once she had that and was cradled in my arms drinking, I finished my eggs, while Esme milled around the kitchen. "Do you think, well did you hear Edward talking to Carlisle when Carlie and I came here that first day?"

"I didn't hear much. My husband told me that he wants you to talk to someone." Esme sat down in the seat she had recently left. There wasn't any worry about him saying too much. They were all trying to focus on my lead, though right now past taking care of Carlie, and getting to know Edward better, figuring out what came next wasn't very easy.

"There were a few things that happened to me. Things I have yet to really deal with. Carlisle suggested that I speak to someone he knows from the hospital. The problem is, what happened is more in the field of needing to talk to one of you, or another vampire. I thought maybe talking to him would be comfortable, but I don't want anyone to judge me."

Her hand on mine drew my attention to Esme. "None of us would ever do that, Bella. If you want to speak to Carlisle, he would be more than happy to help you. If I can help in anyway, I will also listen anytime you want to talk."

The concern she had for me was evident in the tone of her voice along with the way she looked at me. It was a mother's concerned gaze. Maybe there would be times I could talk to her, but never about what Victoria had done to me, especially with the baby.

In my arms, Carlie pushed the cup away, struggling to sit up even as I helped her. She kept struggling, and when she was on her feet, she toddled in the direction of where Esme had been cooking. As I was about to go after her, Esme asked if she could. I nodded, finishing my last bite of egg.

From one of the lower cabinets, Esme pulled out a pot, and from a drawer she got a plastic spoon setting both on the floor. Instantly my baby plopped down on her bottom and began to bang the spoon on the pot. It must be ingrained in a mother's brain that their children enjoy making lots of noise with a spoon and a pot. Along with the banging, my baby began to try singing, though it sounded more like yelling. Even so, her yelling along with the pot banging was an affirmation that she was getting better, and that she was starting to get comfortable with the other members of Edward's family.

Not long after we finished in the kitchen, Esme carried Carlie, the pot and her spoon into their giant open front room, putting her down on the floor so she could continue her music. Being in a new room meant other things to look at and explore. While Esme kept up with Carlie, I sat down on the piano bench. Edward played for us any time I asked, or anytime Carlie walked over and patted the bench. Our little girl also liked getting beneath the piano to play with the shiny petals.

Just as I reached out to touch one of the keys, my phone went off in my pocket. To my surprise, it was Jake's number. "Hello?"

"Hey, Bella."

What was I supposed to say? The last time we talked, which felt like years ago, he finally got the message that there was nothing for him with me. "So, how are things?"

This time he was the quiet one. He'd said there were some things he wanted to talk to me about, but he never had gotten back in touch with me. "I was wondering if you can come here, or if I can come over to your place. I really need to talk to you."

If he knew where I was, Jake wouldn't want to see me at all. It had been a few days since I'd been out of the house, and there were some things I'd been meaning to get from Charlie's. "Why don't you come to my place? Give me an hour or so to get a few things done."

"Sure sure. See you in a few."

Once the call ended, I glanced over to the right, finding Carlie sitting on Esme's lap. She had a magazine in her hands, and whatever she was showing her, had Carlie's interest. "Esme, do you mind driving us to my dad's?"

She smiled over at me. "Not at all. If you don't mind, I'd like to text Carlisle to let him know that I may be gone when he comes back."

Her mention of Carlisle brought Edward to mind. "I'll text Edward also."

My baby chose that moment to fling the magazine away, though Esme was quick to catch it. Maybe she would go down for an early nap.

After texting Edward, I took Carlie up to our room getting her diaper changed along with packing a few things in her diaper bag. The phone in my pocket vibrated as I settled Carlie against my hip. Edward told me to be careful, and to text him if I needed anything. It felt nice to be given the space I needed to work things out.

Getting Carlie strapped in her seat caused her to cry, and even as I sat in the backseat with her, she struggled, kicking her bare feet against the back leather seats of the Mercedes. An early nap was definitely in order. "Hey booger bear."

Her little arms wrapped around my wrist after putting my hand against her chest. She continued to cry, shaking her head back and forth, sometimes yelling "No"

"Should I pull over?"

"No. I think she just needs to go down for a nap. At least I was hoping that, not wanting a repeat visit to the hospital.

Being back at Charlie's felt strange. As I finished cleaning the dishes in the kitchen, I wondered why that was so. A knock at the door distracted me from that question, and as I opened the door, Jake was there wearing his cutoffs, and nothing else. He followed me into the family room without saying a word.

After sitting down with him on one end of the couch and me on the other, I waited for him to say something. Instead, he traced his fingers over the edges of his seat.

"Jake?"

My friend looked at me. In his eyes I could tell this wasn't just a simple visit. Suddenly it came to me. "You've imprinted?"

His head shook. "Not exactly. Crap, where do I begin. There is a reason why I haven't been calling. First I know that some of the bloo, some of the Cullens are back in town. Charlie said the baby got sick. How is she?"

"Better. Having Carlisle here has been a big help to her. She is taking six ounces of blood a day. Evidently she's needed it all along."

He seemed distracted, nervous. "So if you didn't imprint, what has happened. You can tell me."

"Well, evidently Alpha's don't imprint. We find an equal mate to insure the strongest bloodlines, or at least that's the working theory."

"Isn't that what imprinting does?"

"Imprinting is finding a soul mate, not so much with the bloodlines, although I guess it does help. Anyway this is sort of going to be a shock. Okay, so you know that Leah's the only female in recorded history, well as far back as we can trace it, who has ever phased." He scratched his head and took a breath. "So, after you and me talked that day, and I left. I didn't feel like phasing. I didn't want everyone seeing my thoughts and the pity party I was throwing. I ran back to La Push on foot. I went down to First Beach and just sat down in the sand.

Leah found me there, and sat with me. Sometimes she likes to talk to me. I guess because she sees me as safe. Like there's no way she'll find me attractive or something. Anyway we just talked about stuff, like normal. This time it was me doing the talking though. I didn't really say anything about you, but she figured something was up with that. Well, it was getting too personal, so she raced me up to the cliffs and we dove into the ocean. Well um, we got back to First Beach and Seth came running and said there was a trace of vampire. Little punk took off with us running after him. We got to a place where we could get out of our clothes and well shit this is weird."

"You are telling me that you are her mate?" He was uncomfortable, and I wasn't sure what to think. It was me who pushed him away. That wasn't something I regretted given what was going on with my emotions now. Hearing that he might be her mate, for some reason my heart felt heavy in my chest.

"This time when she phased, maybe because there were more Cullens than the last time, but this time there is me as Alpha, and her as my Alpha mate. She can talk to Sam and me like Alpha to Alpha, and he can't see into her mind. She's really happy about that."

"How do you feel?"

"Still trying to figure that one out. I'm attracted to her. She's pissed off about all this, never thinking it was going to be me."

A part of me wanted to know why he felt the need to inform me of this. Even though there was that thought, I was grateful he was talking to me again. "Edward came back."

Jacob's head snapped over at me. "Really?"

I nodded. "Alice told him about Carlie, and he came with Carlisle."

"But not for you?"

That had been what I thought about last night after waking up from the dream. "He said he had at first, now he is beginning to see that he came back for both of us. He knows about my abduction"

Jacob looked quickly away.

"You told him?"

He shook his head. "I had no idea he could read my mind. When I found out it hurt him to see you, I let him have full access to my thoughts."

Anger flared through my body, and I shut my eyes counting to ten. "How could you do that to me, to him? That wasn't something you had any right to share, and I know you could have thought about other things. You came to the hospital didn't you?"

"Bells, I'm sorry."

"No you're not. You've hated him since you found out he was interested in me. Jake, you had no right to do that to him. You had no right to tell Charlie about me going over to their house, and you had no right to tell him you kissed me. You are such a pain in the ass. Get out!"

He stood up holding his hands up.

"I said get out."

As soon as he was gone with the door shut, I turned around and slid down to the ground. Edward had seen, he had known, and he acted like it was the first time when I said anything to him about Victoria. He said I could trust him not to protect me, and keep things from me. Why was I so stupid? Suddenly I couldn't stand it anymore. I got up needing to just drive. It was then I realized that Carlie's seat was in their Mercedes.

I let out a yell and hit the wall with my fists until they were bleeding. The need to run was powerful, but leaving Carlie alone wasn't something I'd ever do.

In spite of my knuckles still bleeding, and the wall having blood dripping down it, I took off up the stairs. In my old room I rummaged around in my closet until I found the sling that Sue had gotten for me at my baby shower. After adjusting the straps to fit me, I went to the crib and lifted my sleeping baby into my arms. How she had managed to sleep through my fit, I didn't know, but I was very grateful as I got her in the sling. She woke up glancing at me as she smiled.

"Hey beautiful girl, how do you feel about taking a breather with your mommy?"

"Ah ah. Ma ma ma." After putting on my hiking boots, and draping a blanket around my daughter, we went out the back door. For a second the memories of Victoria taking me not far from where we were standing, froze me into place. She was gone, and with that thought in mind and the hurt and anger I still felt with the new information from Jake, we were on our way.

The trip deeper and deeper into the forest was quiet. Carlie wasn't saying anything as she rested her left cheek against my chest, and my breathing hitched as the stupid tears began to fall again. I'd run through the forest before and gotten lost. Now I was doing it again with my baby. The longer I walked, the more the tears kept coming. Edward had left me in the forest. Victoria had taken me in the forest. When I came to a tree that had fallen down and was blocking our way, I shut my eyes swaying with my daughter as I took a gasping breath. My baby looked up at me, reaching up to pat my cheek. Not able to stand on my trembling legs, I sank down sitting on the wet forest floor, not caring that my butt was getting soaked.

"Your momma is messing everything up. For the first time since having you, I'm sitting in this forest crying about how unfair everything is just now."

My baby kept watching me. When her hand reached up and wiped at my cheek, my sobs came. What was I supposed to do? Her lip quivered and when she started to cry, I pressed her cheek against my chest. Above us the sound of rain falling on the trees became heavier. Water began to drip down on us, so I got to my feet glancing around. Everything looked the same.

"Shh, I'm sorry baby."

"Bella?"

Edward came at me from the right. As much as I wanted to yell at him and tell him to get the hell away from me, the need for someone to hold on to both of us was just too much. In a moment he was hugging us, as Carlie continued to cry. "Will you help me get her out?"

He parted from me long enough to ease her from the sling. Carlie snuggled against his chest rubbing her cheek against the tan button down shirt he was wearing. His eyes were on me as I nodded, knowing that at the moment she needed someone who wasn't an emotional wreck to hold her.

Once he had the blanket draped over her, Edward reached to take my hand before noticing that my knuckles were raw. "I punched the wall at Charlie's house."

Without hesitation he lifted my right hand to his lips kissing each knuckle, repeating that action with my left hand. My left hand remained in his as he guided me out of the woods.

Back at Charlie's house he gave Carlie to me, though she was instantly interested in the toys she still had here. Edward disappeared for a moment, before returning with the first aid kit. My breathing still hitched as he tended to my raw knuckles. When he applied peroxide it burned, I took in a breath. Edward's eyes were on me as he blew on them. After he put some ointment on my left knuckle he wrapped gauze around it. When the right hand was tended to he put away the first aid kit. Carlie came back to me with the butterfly Alice had gotten her, while Edward made fast work of cleaning off the wall.

"Do you want to stay here?"

My thoughts were on what he hadn't shared with me and the tears began again. "Jake came by. It was my reason for coming out here, aside from needing a few things for Carlie."

Our little girl shook her butterfly laughing, none the worse for wear. She slid off my lap and went back to her other toys.

"He said you read his thoughts, and knew about Victoria. Why didn't you tell me? Why make me trudge through that mess?"

His eyes found my own as he sat next to me. "If I would have brought that up while we were at the hospital with Carlie, just out of the blue, would you have been able to handle that?"

Not able to look at him, I dropped my gaze, but a moment later his finger was under my chin easing it back so we were once again seeing one another. "Because I love and respect you Bella, I felt it was better for you to bring that up when you were ready. I'm trying as best I can to figure out what to do. This isn't easy for me either. I am trying to let you have the space you need, but finding you outside just now and seeing how hurt you are. I'm lost too."

"No no." Our daughter was in front of Edward patting his knees. "No no."

His voice had been raised just a moment ago, and evidently Carlie wasn't appreciating his tone. I bit my bottom lip trying my best not to laugh. From the look on Edward's face, he was also doing his best not to laugh. Leave it to our seventeen month old baby to lighten the moment. Once she was sure I was safe, she went back to her toys.

Both of us chuckled and when Edward took my hand I didn't try and pull away. "I'm a mess," I finally said.

"I wish I knew what do and say to help."

"Talking to me, being honest like you just were is a big help. I didn't think until just now, how it would have been for me, finding out you had known about Victoria because of Jake. He has a lot of nerve doing that to you, and to me. Maybe figuring things out with Leah will help him see that sometimes its best just not to say anything." If what I said had Edward curious, he didn't tell me.

Our baby came back over, and as she passed us by, I made a face. "Time to change her."

"Do you mind if I do that?"

I looked over at him. "It's a messy job."

"I don't mind." After I told him where her diapers were kept down here, along with the wipes and changing pad, Edward got all he needed and put them down next to me on the sofa. When he got to our little girl he lifted her above his head, causing her to laugh. He also got her butterfly toy and brought it back to my side. Less than a minute later our baby was in a clean diaper, back on the floor playing as Edward used a plastic grocery bag to dispose of the diaper and wipes.

"When did you learn to change a baby?"

"Watching you, and Youtube."

I laughed as he smiled at me. "I used Youtube when I was pregnant with her. There are a lot of videos on how to take care of a newborn." As quickly as the happiness had come, it left while my thoughts went to our newborn daughter.

"I think I'm ready to go back to your house. Esme dropped us off and didn't leave the car."

"And she came back while I was going after you. Did you get what you wanted for Carlie?"

"No." In the bathroom I gathered up her bath toys, putting them in the netting that hung from the wall. From my room I got the rest of her onesies from my bottom drawer, packing those in her diaper bag.

Once I was ready, Edward held my hand, while carrying our baby out to the Mercedes. He opened my door first and once I was inside he shut it for me. Instead of putting Carlie in her seat right away, he got in the front and let her help him turn the car on. A moment later Claire De Lune was playing, and when he leaned in and settled Carlie in her seat, she didn't fuss or cry. She did reach for my hand, falling asleep before we had even gotten outside of Fork's city limits.

How did Edward know what to do, not only with our daughter, but even with me? When I'd gotten mad at him about Jake, he didn't just take it this time. He asked me how I would have felt if he would have said something. His question had been so unexpected; there was nothing I could think of in response. As I dropped my head, he lifted it back and raised his voice when he told me he didn't know what to do. In a strange sort of way, knowing that he didn't have all of the answers was kind of nice.

My door opened, and the realization that we were back at the Cullen's hit me, along with how absolutely out of it I was. After getting out, Edward leaned in and was able to remove Carlie from her seat without waking her up. Where had my need to do this all on my own gone off too? It should be me taking her out of that seat.

In our room, he settled her down in the crib as I sat on the bed looking down at my feet. My butt was still wet, and as I stood up and saw that the bed was wet, and the seat in the car. I bit my lip hard.

Edward's hand took my right one gently, and I glanced up at him. "Do you want me to run you a bath?" All I could do was nod once.

His eyes were on me as he bent his head down and pressed the lightest of kisses to my lips. As he was about to stop kissing me, my hands moved to the back of his head, almost as if they were moving apart from my own thoughts. I pressed the back of his head and opened my mouth. His tongue darted in, pressing upward as I bit down. My teeth stayed where they were as his tongue eased out, and his lips pressed harder against mine, before softening again. He kissed gently like my lips were there for him to worship. When he parted, I nearly fell down, but his hands kept me steady. "Bath", I breathed.

He nodded and a moment later I was left alone.

The warm waters in the huge bathtub covered my body along with the bubbles. At first my knuckles had stung. Now nothing was hurting, not even my heart. His kiss hadn't been unexpected. The way my body reacted had. I'd wanted more, and it seemed like he was willing to let me take the lead. It had been that way in the meadow as well. He had let his guard down and that day had been one of the most amazing days of my life. It hadn't all been fun. At first when I slid down on him, the pain had been unbearable. Even then he hadn't stopped me, and eventually things went from pain to pure pleasure.

What did we do now? The way he had kissed my knuckles stuck in my mind. The way he had taken care of me just a few minutes ago was kind of nice. For so long, I'd been the one to take care of things, first with my mom, then with Charlie as far as cooking for us and keeping his house clean. Now I was Carlie's momma. It never seemed like I'd been taken care of before. Edward was seventeen. No he was much older. He played his part as a high school student, but he had been through much more than me. Maybe he had more wisdom on things than me. They all had a lot more life experience.

Realizing that I didn't want to be alone, I got out of the bath and dried off, putting on the pair of sweats and long shirt I'd brought in with me. In my room, Carlie was still snoozing away, and Edward was sitting on the bed, though he got up and came over to me a second later.

I reached for him first and when I was in his arms, I breathed in. These arms made me feel safe. I still needed space to see if I could trust him, or maybe I just needed to trust him and go with what ever came.

"How was your bath?"

"Really nice." I glanced up at him. "Do you want to know what it was like when Carlie was born?"

He nodded before guiding me to the bed. After we were seated together, I leaned into him. "There was a month for me between Victoria and her birth. I wasn't eating as well as I should, because everything was making me sick. I spent a lot of time lying in bed, not wanting to talk to anyone. My mom even flew up, and I know she and Charlie were really worried. As far as they know I just got lost in the woods again, for three weeks. Lying to them was hard, later as I thought on it I felt guilty. At the time it came really easy. It was like I didn't care anymore, not about me, and not about our baby.

Emily had come to visit the day I went into labor. She's Sam's wife. He was Jake's Alpha before he took over. We were sitting in the kitchen when I felt a sharp pain right here." I took his hand and put it behind me against my back. "After that it all happened so fast. Emily knew it was labor, especially when my water broke. An ambulance came and Charlie arrived at the hospital moments later. They flew me in a medical helicopter to Seattle. I was so afraid that my thoughts had caused her to come early. At the hospital, I was alone. They wouldn't let Charlie fly with me, and Carlie wasn't waiting for anyone.

They got me in the OR and there were lots of people. When I needed to push they told me to hold off at first, but I couldn't Edward. I tried so hard to keep her in, but I couldn't. On the way over, the Medic told me to be prepared for her not to live." Edward's arms drew around me, as the tears began to fall. Now I was on a roll and I couldn't stop. "Finally they said to push and I don't remember feeling much pain. I think I pushed three times, but then it was done, and she was gone. I remember I kept asking how she was. They didn't have any news and took my back to a room. I cried until a different nurse came in. She was not as old as some of the nurses in the OR. She told me that my baby was stable. They had given me something to help her lungs develop a little better, and she needed help to breathe, but she was holding her own."

I took his hand and held it out. I put one finger at his finger tips and another finger at the center of his hand. "She was this big, and she was alive."

His arms wrapped around me and there wasn't any more I could say. It had been a long day, and I knew it was barely after noon.

"Were there any setbacks for her?"

"No. a month after she was born, she was able to breathe on her own. I was also adamant about nursing her, so I pumped. Getting to bring her home at three and a half months was amazing, and scary. She was so tiny even then. I wish you could have seen her. Remind me to get the pictures from Charlie's. I also took videos. I've been wondering something. Have you ever acted older than someone in high school?"

"Yes. I did attend medical school, two times. The oldest I can pass for is 23, and even that is pushing it."

"When you're with me, this afternoon, you were different."

"Was I too forceful?"

I shook my head. "No. I kind of needed to be reminded that this isn't easy for you either. But it feels like you see me differently.

Edward turned and faced me. "The first time we were together, was my first time being in love. I felt like you needed protecting and guidance, especially because you wanted to become as I am. You were different than anyone else I met because there was no way of knowing what your thoughts were. I actually had to wait for answers. The mistake after your party was me deciding for you that leaving was the safest option."

There was more I wanted to hear, but Carlie calling out for me put that on hold.

With Carlie playing in her playroom in Esme's company, Edward led the way down to Carlisle's office. Before we could knock, he opened the door and let us in. His office was the way I had remembered it. For a brief few moments I looked at the pictures. It was Edward's hand on mine that gave me the strength to sit down on one of the sofas. I'd asked to do this on my own, and after he kissed me and was gone, I shut my eyes. "I thought about what you said, about wanting me to see the woman at the hospital. What I need is to be able to talk it all through, and leaving the parts out about Victoria wouldn't help."

Carlisle walked over to the sofa and sat down as I finished speaking. "Do you feel comfortable talking to me?"

"I thought I might be able too, and I know Edward was able to tell you everything I told him. What I need is to speak to a vampire that doesn't really know me all that well. Carlie was born a month after Victoria, and after she came along, I thought I was doing well. I was focused on getting her healthy enough to bring home. Once she was home, I was focused on making sure she was eating enough, and having enough pee and poop diapers. Now it's like my mind can't keep it all in anymore and that I've got to process this all. Why is it so different now?" My eyes found his, and in them there was love and compassion there. Carlisle wasn't judging me.

"It seems as though you had to keep your guard up. You needed to protect your baby and Charlie. My belief is that with our return, you are realizing that there is now someone here that you can tell. You no longer have to keep this a secret."

As my eyes began to water, Carlisle reached behind him, taking a Kleenex from a box set on an end table. I blotted my eyes. "I'm really confused right now about my relationship with Edward. A part of me feels betrayed because he left, and now he's back and it feels like I should be grateful. Another part of me is glad that I'm not alone. I've always wanted Carlie to know her father, from the moment she was growing inside of me. I'm also tired Carlisle. I've been taking care of people it seems since I was a little kid. Mom did a good job when I was little, but once I was older, and realized how bad she was with things like finances, the need to take over, took over. Moving back in with my dad, it was the same sort of thing. He needed someone to cook for him. He didn't ask me to, but there was that obligation. Now I'm Carlie's Mommy, and it's like I can't let this be happening. Earlier today I got so overwhelmed that I took her into the forest. I was crying, and she reached up and brushed my tears away. I don't want my little girl to feel like she has to be the adult." I wiped my nose and my eyes.

"There is no hurry to figure out your relationship with my son. As long as you want him here, he will stay. He learned a very difficult lesson when we all left."

It felt like there was more. "What did you say when he told you."

"When he came to me, and told me it was time for us to move on, I had him sit down in this very office. I asked him if he had given any thought to what you would feel if we left the way he wanted. His answer wasn't what I had hoped."

Carlisle paused.

"Tell me."

"It won't be easy for you to hear, and he agrees that I can tell you."

I nodded, bracing myself for the worst. "What he said is that you have a human mind and that you would with time heal and forget about him. It was very upsetting for me to hear that from him. It made me realize that he didn't know how fragile your mind was, and I'm so sorry for that Bella."

It hurt, but at least he was telling me this. It was something I had never had the guts to ask Edward, for fear he wouldn't tell me what I was hearing now.

"Will you tell me what you're feeling?"

"Hurt, because he didn't know how I saw myself at that time, and anger because he really didn't have a clue. I wonder if he does now."

"Yes. His views on how he sees the world around him changed while he was away. I won't go into detail because he needs to tell you if he hasn't already, but I assure you that he feels guilty about that night."

Good. I wanted him to feel bad.

"I've got a lot of anger in me." I held up my bandaged hands. "I punched the wall at my father's house until my knuckles bled. Right now, I don't feel like I have a place of my own. I'm really thankful that I can stay here, but this doesn't feel like home, and today at Charlie's, that didn't feel like home either. The thing is I'm not ready to live in an apartment or in town even. I just don't know."

Carlisle nodded and got up, moving over to his desk. He wrote a few things down before he came back to me. "How long has it been since you got a good night's sleep?"

That was easy to answer. "Before Carlie got sick. I keep dreaming about Victoria."

"I'm going to give you a little bit of homework. What I need for you to do is to write down your feelings when she had you. You don't have to make complete sentences. I want you to keep it in a notebook, and keep that notebook at your bedside. If you have a nightmare, and if you can't sleep, write down the things you can remember. You don't need to share any of it with me or Edward. Sometimes getting what is going on in your mind out on paper helps. When Edward was turned, I had him write down the things he remembered from his human life. At first he didn't think it was helping, but now he's seen the benefit. If each time you're hurting, you can find time to write this all out, I promise it will start helping. I am also going to ask your trust."

My mind was already overloading, and he waited for me to process what he'd just said. "I trust you."

"Jasper is very good at sensing the emotions of others. If you don't mind, I want to have him help with this. I want him with us, or you can talk to him on your own. I think maybe he will be able to bring things out better than just me."

It was a lot to consider. "Can he be around me?"

"Yes he can. He's been going with Alice into Boston to be around people. It was difficult for him at first, but he's much more confident. Bella, if I didn't trust him to control himself, I wouldn't be asking you to allow this."

Trusting Carlisle and what he said was easy. He hadn't done anything to cause me to doubt. "Please ask him."

Before leaving his office, Carlisle gave me a notepad along with a fancy pen. In the front room, I sat down on one of the sofas opened up the pad, and wrote down the first word that came to mind,_ Confused. _Once I got started, the rest of the words came pouring out. Three pages later, Carlie's laughter reached my ears. As I closed the book and put it aside, Edward came down with her on his shoulders followed by Esme.

"Look how tall you are," I said as I got up and went over to them.

Already my angel was leaning out for me, and when she was low enough for me to hold her, I did, kissing her sweet baby cheeks. "Did you have fun with Daddy and with…" I paused as I glanced at Esme.

"How about Mimi?" she asked.

"Did you have fun with your Mimi?"

Carlie bounced in my arms, laughing as I gave her more kisses. When Edward began to play the piano, I went over and sat beside him. Carlie leaned her head against my left arm, letting me know she wanted to nurse. Once she was, Edward began to play something very soothing. I leaned my head against his shoulder as he continued to play, thinking about my day and about my talk with Carlisle. He was correct. Writing things down, words or full sentences was helping. I glanced down at my baby as she sat back up, and once I'd put myself back together she was reaching for her daddy. He moved one hand away from the piano, playing with his left. Once Carlie was on his lap, he played with both hands. Our little girl didn't try to touch the keys, her eyes keeping up with the movement of his fingers. I could see piano lessons in her future, and maybe for now thinking about her future would be less confusing than thinking of mine.

**Authors Notes:** _Thank you all for the reviews. I'm hoping that this chapter helped to clear some things up about where Bella's thoughts are. She's been through a lot, and I'm looking forward to having things start to ease up for her so she can see that Edward is someone she can trust again. Please keep up the reviews, and to those who have you have my thanks triple fold._


	8. Writing and Talking

**Chapter 8: Writing and Talking**

**Bella**

Sitting on the giant bed in Edward's room with Carlie napping next to me, my worry of seeing Jasper again wasn't going away. It wasn't that he scared me, because far worse things had taken place since that time. The hard part was the anticipation of letting another person in on the events of my abduction, and what his reaction would be. I was beyond wanting anyone to feel sorry for me. After being "found" in the woods, and going into the hospital for a five day stay, the number of people who told me how sorry they were had been more than I wanted. It was also difficult because there wasn't a way to tell anyone aside from Jake, and a few others some of what had happened. Even still, they never got the full story. Talking to Edward was the first time I'd brought up what exactly Victoria had done. It felt like those memories were never going to go away.

Before I could worry more about any of it, I began to write in my notebook, filling four pages with what I was feeling. On another page I drew a line down the middle and a line across, close to the top. On the left side, I wrote Edward's name, on the right, Victoria. Today was one of the days I asked for Edward to give me time alone. It wasn't anything he had done, but being alone gave me the chance to process things, and to have our baby to myself. Carlie was beginning to trust her father, but it was a very slow process. With Esme, Carlie was fine most of the time. I wondered if it was because she wasn't used to having a lot of males around her.

The knock on my door was soft enough that it didn't bother my baby. I slipped out of the bed and found Alice on the other side. Without having to think about it, I put my arms around her. "I've missed you."

"I missed you too," she answered as we moved apart. "How are you?"

While answering, I motioned for her to come in, shutting the door before going over to the ottoman to join her. "Tired, confused."

Alice put her left hand on one of mine as I rested it on my lap. "You are one of the strongest people I've ever met. I keep trying to put myself in your shoes, but I can't. I wish there was something I could do to help."

"Alice, finding me at the airport, coming back here with me, being the one to call in the cavalry when Carlie got sick are all things you've done that have helped. You're lucky that you don't have a way to truly understand this. I feel torn with Edward. I've always seen him in a way that really isn't all that healthy, almost like idolizing him. He always seemed so sure of himself, enough for me to doubt some things, that at the time I didn't."

"Jasper feels like he should have done more to stop us from leaving you. He's not happy with my brother."

"Alice, there was nothing he could have done."

She sighed. "He wishes he would have had more control that night. Jasper believes if he would have, maybe we could have all had a better chance of telling Edward we weren't leaving. The hard part is that Carlisle supported his decision, maybe because Edward was the first he created. At the time, he trusted Edward's judgment. There is also the matter of Carlie."

All of this was surprising to hear. I'd been so caught up in my own bubble of life, I hadn't thought about how this would affect the rest of the Cullens. "None of you could have known it was going to happen. Neither one of us planned for it too."

She was still holding my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "No, but, I just wish there would have been some part of him that would have thought about you. Maybe that he had somehow hurt you, something that would have clued him in to the fact that he needed to say something to Carlisle. And don't you feel guilty for our reactions to this."

Alice knew me well. Already my mind was beginning to go into the direction of guilt.

"Ma ma ma."

After Alice let go of my hand, I walked over to the bed and sat down, Gently, I lifted my sleepy little girl against my shoulder. Carlie rested her cheek against my there, pulling her arms between my chest and hers. The bed shifted only slightly as Alice sat next to me.

"How is she doing now?"

"Much better. I should have figured out that she needed blood from the beginning. I was so afraid of that, and it adds to everything that has me so unhinged right now. I thought what I was doing was good enough."

Her hand on my shoulder gave me some strength. "Bella, you did the best you could do under the circumstances. No one is perfect, well maybe I am… but."

We both laughed. Her comment lightening the moment as Carlie looked at her Aunt.

"Hey you. I missed seeing you. Has your momma let you wear your pretty dress yet?"

When I admitted I hadn't, Alice left the room, coming back a second later with the beautiful dress she had ordered from Paris. After I changed Carlie's diaper I let Alice dress her, including putting on the tights and the shoes. When Carlie was all dressed, Alice carried her with me following behind, down to the second level of the house. The room she and Jasper shared was a little bigger than Edwards. There were all sorts of clothes put on manikins, and a door stood open that looked like it led into a vast closet. Alice was standing in front of a floor to ceiling mirror showing Carlie how pretty she was. I had to admit that she looked really cute all dressed up, and hoped Alice wouldn't feel like she could just start buying a whole new wardrobe for my baby.

When Carlie searched around and found me standing next to the door, she got fussy, and when she was in my arms, I knew she wanted to nurse. Alice led me to a chair and once Carlie was occupied, she sat down in a chair across from me. "Thank you for letting me spoil her a little."

"I think this dress is so beautiful. I love the gauzy layer over the satin, and the pale blue coloring. These shoes remind me of something a ballerina would wear."

"I picked them because they looked like they would be comfortable on her little feet."

They did look comfortable.

Downstairs, after Carlie finished nursing and had clothes on her better suited for milling around, I sat down with her in the family room. Alice walked over with one of her puzzles and dumped it out on the floor. When she looked past us, I turned finding Jasper standing behind the white sofa. Suddenly, I wasn't sure what to say. My stomach began to churn. Just as suddenly, I was perfectly comfortable, and grateful that he had a way to help calm things down. "Thank you."

He nodded walking around the couch to sit down. "It is good to see you again."

"It's nice seeing all of you."

His gaze went to Carlie, and I wondered while he watched her, if he was picking up any emotions she might be feeling. It had occurred to me not long after my first talk with Carlisle that part of bringing Jasper in was so that when my emotions got away, he could help me reign them back in. Maybe there was more than just that. Again, I felt an instant calming, where before there would have been more chaotic whirling of memories and worries that would have driven me, with Carlie, back to the solitude of Edward's room.

"Let me know if you don't want me to do this." His voice was quiet, calming.

"No, right now it's nice to feel a little peace. I've had to hide out in Edward's room because my mind goes every which way. It's sort of like having a wound, only instead of just a small area on my body, it's all of me. I feel exposed."

"That is very understandable. Do you want to talk now?"

I looked over at my daughter who was perfectly content working on her puzzle with her Aunt. Alice smiled at me. "I'll come get you if she gets fussy."

Knowing she was safe, I followed Jasper as he led me to the other end of the house, into Carlisle's office. Carlisle wasn't there, likely at work, or out with Esme. I sat down on the sofa, not knowing really what I wanted to talk about with him.

"We were all naive to think by leaving, you would be safe, especially with Victoria out wanting revenge. I spoke with Edward. He told me he had tracked her into South America before he lost her, and himself. In many ways Victoria was more dangerous than James."

He had given me an opening. "She was angry at losing James, and she wanted me to suffer the way she thought he had. At first it was all about me. Laurent warned that she wanted to kill me slowly, and for the first few days, I fought with all my might. I had my baby to think about. The more she did to me, scratching my arms and my legs, and even my belly, the more I began to lose hope." Just talking about that time, made me feel uneasy.

"What was it that made you lose hope, or start too?"

My eyes shut as I took myself back to that cabin. The things Edward had said in the forest before he left burned their way to the front of my mind. _Don't worry_. _You're human-your memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind._ "He told me time heals all wounds. He was tired of pretending to be human. All those words played in my mind. The longer she held me captive the worse it became. She killed a baby in front of me. She wanted to keep me long enough to kill my baby. I didn't know if she was aware that Carlie was different."

"I'm so sorry for what he said."

"I feel angry at him sometimes. Other times I just want to let him hold me until all the pain goes away. What good is my anger going to do?"

"Letting yourself feel your emotions, letting it all out is very healthy, Bella. Carlisle said you've been writing in a notebook."

I nodded. "That has helped a lot. Should I be worried about what Edward feels?"

Jasper walked over to me. "He needs to feel responsible for this, guilty ashamed. My brother says he loves you. I think about how much I love Alice and care for her. If she was ever to be injured because of me, I would never run away from her. I would feel guilty and responsible, but I would stay by her side. I know Edward was trying to keep you from danger, but he needed to let you have a part in what happened as well."

"Where is he?"

"Off to consider a few things I said to him, more than likely. I don't want you to worry about that."

They all seemed to know me pretty well. "I don't know what to do next."

"Keep talking this through with me, or Carlisle. Don't worry about anyone right now accept for you and Carlie. Know that none of us including my brother are leaving you alone in this."

His words helped, and I could trust them. "Do you think he wants to leave again?"

Jasper finally sat down next to me. "No. He wants to show you he can be trusted, and he also knows that it's not going to come all at once."

"Even if something were to happen, if I got hurt or Carlie?"

"Bella, he is fighting not to do what he does best, which is to take over and take control. He knows that you're not the same girl he left. He knows he has to give you space and take your lead, but he struggles with it because for the entirety of his new life he's controlled everything around him. This relationship he has with you is very, very different than when you were with him the first time. Now if you need him and want him to be with you, he said you know to call him."

I did know that.

Being back with Carlie in the front room was a breath of fresh air. She had been sitting on Alice's lap looking at another magazine, this one of fashion designs instead of home décor. While I sat in the middle of the huge room, she was content to toddle around, making her way over to Edward's piano. The only time she didn't hesitate to let him hold her was when he was playing. It was like the music was a way of bonding with him. Underneath the piano, my little girl sat down and started to play with the pedals. After moment I walked over to her and knelt down. "What are you doing under there? Those pedals don't make the music baby."

My angel glanced at me before she crawled out, getting to her feet. Her little hands patted at the bench, so I pulled it out and settled her on it. Since she was too short to reach the keys I sat next to her putting her on my lap. After lifting the cover up, I pressed one of the keys. Carlie bounced on my lap lifting her hand up. Before it could slam down on the keys, I caught her hand. "This you have to be gentle with. I tried to make her hand into a fist, but she struggled, shaking her head. "No no. No no."

As I got up to distract her, she struggled and began to cry.

"Bella?"

Hearing Edward's voice was a relief, and when Carlie saw him, she leaned out. I nodded letting him take her, watching as he sat down and began to play. Just as she had before, Carlie sat very still watching his hands as they moved across the keys. A moment later I settled next to him wondering how long it had taken for him to learn to play. Did someone teach him when he was a child, or had he just taught himself? Edward kept playing, and Carlie didn't move a muscle. Movement from my left drew my gaze in that direction. Esme was there along with Alice and Jasper, all of them watching him play.

Sometimes he would play so fast, I couldn't even keep track of his hands. The music would grow quite loud. Then he would play softer in tunes that were like a lullaby. I looked at our daughter, smiling because the back of her head was resting against his chest, and her little feet and legs were moving, like she was trying to figure out the beat of what her daddy was playing. When the music came to an end, Carlie tilted her head up, reaching her hand until she was rubbing his chin. When his head tilted down her hand found his lips, and she smiled at him when he kissed her there.

Our daughter looked over at me, before leaning against his arm. As I hugged her against my shoulder, Esme walked over handing me a sippy cup. Carlie rested in my arms drinking as Edward began to play something separate and apart from what he had just finished. The music was soothing, and I shut my eyes letting it wash over me. "Do you play when you are worried or stressed?"

"Yes. Some of the greatest music I've composed was when I was at my most emotional. I think that is true of most musicians. Music can tell a story of what the composer is feeling."

"And it sounded like some of that was anger."

"Not at you." He kept playing as I opened my eyes.

"Why not? I've been angry at you before, even today at the things you said in the forest that day. I took risks Edward. I was the one who went to the ballet studio that day."

He kept playing in the gentle tones, like he was some robot with no emotion at all.

"I was angry."

Carlie looked up at me, her little mouth still sucking at the cup in her hands.

Jasper walked over to us and the music stopped. "She can sense what you are feeling now." His eyes were on mine. I was feeling hostile toward Edward, but I focused on our daughter and as she began to smile, I felt my heart lighten. "I've been wondering for a while if she could. "Edward, can you read what she's thinking?"

"I haven't been able to since getting here. Her mind is a mystery just as yours is."

That was a relief. I wanted him to have to figure out what she wanted without an advantage like knowing her thoughts. As I hugged her closer to me, Carlie shut her eyes.

Suddenly Edward and Jasper were gone the only sound was the door shutting behind them. Esme and Alice came to my side. "What is it?"

They looked to one another and then to me. "The rest of the family just arrived." It only took a moment to realize by the rest of the family, they meant Rosalie and Emmett.

**Author's Notes**: _Sorry for the longer delay. I am having a busy week with work and not as much time to write. Updates may be a little longer in between. Thank you all for reading, as well as the adds to lists and the reviews. Keep reading and reviewing. Helps me stay focused and I'll do my best to answer each review. _


	9. Magic Place

**Chapter 9: Magical Place**

**Edward**

Hearing the hum of Rosalie's BMW pulling off of the highway to begin the long drive up to the house, took me away from playing the piano for Carlie and Bella. My sister's thoughts as well as Emmett's were centered on finding out why everyone was at the house aside from them. Jasper had been right about giving them a little more information on why they needed to stay away for just a while longer. He was at my side as I left the house behind. Now that they were here, getting them to leave wasn't an option. Rosalie was already thinking about what she wanted to say to us when she arrived, not yet aware of the reason for keeping them out of the loop. Emmett was a little stressed because it had been her idea to come here. He had tried convincing her that we weren't hiding anything, that she was being paranoid.

"Do you want me to talk to them?" Jasper offered.

I glanced at him as we jogged far enough away from the house so that if Rosalie made a scene, Bella wouldn't hear it. "No, I need to be the one to take care of this, but if you don't mind staying here."

"Not a problem. Bella doesn't need any additional stress."

That was something we could both agree on. Seconds later the BMW stopped in front of us. My sister stepped instantly out of her car. The moment she did, she could hear Carlie fussing from within the house, along with Bella's response that I would be back. Emmett came around the car and stood next to her, more confused than Rosalie.

"Edward, what's going on?" She was no longer annoyed, simply curious why Bella was here, and who the baby was to her.

"Bella is staying with us," Jasper answered, giving me a chance to figure out what to say.

"Wait, I thought you were leaving her alone," Emmett said, his hand resting on Rosalie's shoulder.

Before anyone else could talk, Esme appeared at my side. "Why don't you two come inside?" Our mother gave both of them a hug. While Rosalie walked with her, Emmett pulled the car around to the garages. In Esme's thoughts, I heard the conversation she had with Bella, offering to be the one to explain things to my siblings. Bella seemed relieved when she had suggested it, and had taken Carlie upstairs to settle her down. There was a lot that I needed to do in order to repair the damage my words had caused to Bella, in addition to leaving her as I had. That she no longer trusted me hurt more than anything I had ever experienced.

Inside, Rosalie was quick to take notice of the puzzles on the floor and some building blocks. Instead of asking any questions she sat down on one of the sofas. A moment later, Emmett joined her. It should have been me explaining to my siblings about what had happened, who Carlie was, and why they were here. At the same time I left before I could ask Bella what she wanted them to know, and it appeared she was more comfortable letting Esme do the talking. It was another reason the two of us needed time alone. I needed to listen to her, and if she wanted me to tell her what had been going through my mind that day, I would be more than happy to talk about that.

"How?" Rosalie asked the question as well as silently in her mind. My brother was too stunned about Carlie being my daughter to say a word. Before Esme could reply, my sister was on her feet. "We can't reproduce."

"No, we can't, but Bella is still human." Esme's answer was gentle, and she took Rosalie's hand as my sister sat back down next to her.

It was Bella's voice asking for me that took me away from the conversation. A second later I arrived in the playroom. Carlie was at her little stove, and Bella was sitting on the daybed watching her. "How did they find out?"

"They knew we were here at the house. Jasper and Alice told them that Esme was doing some work to get the house ready for sale, and the last call here, Esme told them that the rest of us were here helping out, but that they didn't need to come down. Rosalie can be persistent." I wanted to apologies to her for their sudden visit, but knew she was tired of apologies.

"One more reason for her to hate me."

Without thought, I sat down on the bed next to her. "Please don't let that worry you."

Her brown eyes found mine, and in them I could see the sadness that was a constant presence in her life. "I keep wondering what I did to her."

"Nothing. You did nothing Bella."

I plastic cookie being laid on Bella's lap interrupted us in a pleasant way. Seeing our daughter smile lightened my heavy heart. Hearing her laugh caused me to smile. When she toddled back over to her stove, I looked again on the woman I loved, hating myself for causing her doubt and pain.

Late that evening, once Bella and Carlie had gone to bed, I left them to sleep, going downstairs. The TV was on, and Emmett was alone flipping through the thousand plus channels we had. His mind was only on finding something to watch. Further away Rosalie, Alice, and Esme were focused on the hunt, spending some time together. It had been since leaving Forks, since we were last together under one roof.

"How could you leave her that way?" The TV turned off and Emmett's thoughts were on what Esme had told them.

"I didn't know that I could get her pregnant."

My brother stood up and walked over to me. "No, not about being pregnant, although that's one thing. I mean how could you leave her, letting her think that she was just a human, just some object that you were tired of? You said you loved her, but it doesn't look that way from where I'm standing. Rosalie is my life, man. If something happened to her, I'd die. If I caused her harm somehow, I'd never forgive myself, but I sure as hell wouldn't leave her and tell her she was just a human, or just some fantasy that I could just get rid of."

What he was telling me hadn't come from Esme. I had a feeling Jasper had filled him in, but I wasn't going to say anything to him for telling Emmett. "I was trying to keep her safe, or did you forget that damn birthday party?" My voice was barely above a whisper.

"Like I said, if something would have happened to Rose, I'd feel guilty as hell, but I wouldn't try and leave her even if it was because I'd failed to protect her. I'd be all about keeping her right next to me so she wouldn't get hurt."

"That's easy for you to say. Rosalie can protect herself." Now I was getting frustrated.

"Doesn't matter. I like Bella a lot. She should be one of us, but you are too much of a pussy to even do that, because you think you know what is best for her. Why don't you ask her what she wants, or why didn't you? That girl has more brains in her head than you do, or were you thinking with that other set of brains when you left!"

All of the anger and frustration I'd been feeling for my actions snapped. My hand was around Emmett's neck one second, and the door was off its hinges in another. My feet carried us away from the house with Emmett struggling to get free of my grasp. Trees broke as I kept running. My grip was ripped free from his neck by Emmett's larger hand, and I found myself on the ground rolling with Emmett down a steep incline. More trees were breaking but I no longer cared as I fought to gain control. The more he made me struggle the angrier I became. Angry at missing seventeen months of my daughter's life, angry at myself for not staying and being the one to keep Victoria away from the woman I loved. Emmett slammed my head into the ground before I flipped away from under him. I jumped on his back and began to pull hard on his head.

"Edward, stop!" Rosalie screamed.

My brother began to run and came to a sudden stop trying to throw me, but I held on feeling the need to sink my teeth into him.

_Edward! This isn't going to help anything. Let him go now!_ Carlisle's thoughts focused on Bella and my daughter, and suddenly all the anger I felt melted away. Emmett threw me off into a tree, stocking off towards the house while I slid down to the ground.

"Come hunt with me."

I looked up at Carlisle, seeing only concern in his eyes, which mirrored his thoughts. After I was on my feet, Carlisle took off towards the river. I ran behind him trying to figure out what had caused me to snap. Some of it had to do with what Emmett had said, but not all of it.

We ran for a long time before coming on a herd of deer. The hunt was something the two of us did on our own. After draining three deer, my mind began to clear.

Carlisle approached a few minutes after my last kill was drained, and stood next to me. "I should have considered how difficult this was for you. Everyone has spoken their peace about how they feel of our leave."

"They all have a right to tell me what they think. Leaving her was unforgivable. I love her with all that I am, but what if that isn't enough. What if she decides to leave me?"

There wasn't any answer or reassurance he could give me. Given what I'd just done to Emmett, and with the way we left the house, she had every right to go back to her father. Did I want that, absolutely not. I shut my eyes, focusing my hearing on the two I loved. Bella was awake talking to Alice, and my head shook when she was asking if I was alright. Carlie's deep breathing meant that the loud crash of the door hadn't woken her.

"I'm at a loss on where to go from here. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells all the time."

We were walking back towards the house, and Carlisle was thinking of her first visit. His memories were of how comfortable she seemed, and more so how accepting Bella had always been of our family. His thoughts traveled further into the past, to a time when I was still alive. He was walking in the park just after dusk. It was just a few days after he arrived in Chicago. What he was focusing on was the beauty of the trees and the smell of rain. The parts of his memory I was noticing were of men and women walking hand in hand in the park. My own fuzzy memories came back to me of how things had been in my time. Young men of my time courted a lady. While those times had changed, the thought came to me that everything with Bella had happened so quickly the first time.

We had a daughter now, but could it hurt to take things slow, ask her to come with me to someplace like our meadow, maybe take both of them. As much as I was beginning to love our little girl, the idea of having Bella all to myself was appealing. She needed to know that I was there for her first and foremost.

By the time we arrived back at the house, the door was back in place none the worse for wear. In my old room, Bella and Carlie were breathing deeply in a sound sleep. "Do you mind if I go to your office?"

Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder and nodded as Esme came from the kitchen.

When we moved away from a place, most of the furniture remained in the house. Dust covers were always in place to keep things as clean as possible. From time to time, Esme would go alone to clean, or Carlisle would go with her. Getting everything set back up for our stay here, hadn't taken very long. In Carlisle's office, I took a seat in his chair, finding paper in the middle drawer, along with a fountain pen.

Staring down at the paper, the words I wanted to express remained locked in my mind. Shutting my eyes, I took a deep breath and thought about the past. Bella's first visit to our home was one among many that I could recall easily. The day before, I'd taken her to the meadow for the very first time. It had been a day of wonder and frustration. Being able to share with her what I looked like in the sunlight had altered my existence. She accepted me so easily, and had been drawn to the way my skin sparkled. What I would have given to know what she thought. My frustration had come from her not telling anyone that she was with me. Bella had been worried about protecting me. At the time I'd thought she was ridiculous. That thought showed me just how cruel I had been even then. I had never seen her as my equal, and it was time for me to start.

With that thought in mind, I began to write down the words that I was feeling, telling her how much it had meant for her to meet my family.

_You trusted me to keep you safe, and you trusted them not to harm you. I've come to realize that I underestimated how strong you really were, and are. I should have respected your views on what was going on, but instead I thought to myself that you were simply too young to understand what you were asking. I've made more mistakes based on what I thought was best than I have in my existence. Now, my hope is that you will let me start again. If you are willing, tomorrow afternoon, I would like to invite you to the meadow. Esme or Alice will watch Carlie for us, if you agree to that. She can also come along if that is more suitable. _

_I'll be awaiting your answer._

_Yours Always,_

_Edward Anthony Masen Cullen_

**Bella**

A tiny foot pressed against the small of my back, along with a sweet aroma, roused me from sleep. The moment my eyes opened, I began to wonder how he was. Alice had said the crash was because he and Emmett had a slight altercation. The crash sounded more than slight to me. Slowly, carefully, I rolled over. Carlie slept on her left side, hugging her blanket in her arms, her legs sticking straight out so that her feet had been right against me. Sometimes she slept in the most bizarre positions. As I began to sit up, a single rose resting on the pillow above Carlie's head, cought my attention. Beneath it was a folded piece of paper. Without hesitation, I picked both of them up. The rose was pure white, and I smiled as I breathed in the sweet perfume. After sitting fully up, with a pillow behind me, I put the rose on my lap and opened the paper.

By the fourth time of reading what Edward had written, I was wiping away the tears. Had he really just asked me to go with him to the meadow? And he was even willing to let us take Carlie, though the idea of being alone with him and hopefully have a chance to talk, was more appealing. Hadn't my dad been after me to see his granddaughter? My finger traced over the slight indentation where Edward had written his name.

"Momma." Carlie was watching me. After wiping away more tears I set the note with the rose aside, settled her against my chest as we snuggled.

"How would you like to go see grandpa Charlie? He's been missing us a whole lot, and I think it's time for a visit."

As she snuggled against my shoulder, I took my cell out and dialed his number, hoping he wasn't fishing with Billy since it was a Saturday.

"Hello?"

"Hey Dad, how would you like spending some time with Carlie."

"I'd love too. Where are you off too?"

For a moment I thought about not saying anything, but I was tired of having to hide things. "Edward asked to go on a hike. We haven't had a chance to talk since I got here, and since the rest of his family came along."

It took a couple of seconds for him to respond. While waiting, I shut my eyes rubbing my hand over Carlie's back. "You need to let him know that you aren't going to just take him back."

"He knows that already. So are you up for time with your granddaughter?"

"Absolutely."

After promising to bring her by around noon, I hung up the phone realizing my angel had gone back to sleep. Holding her against me, I picked up the rose, shutting my eyes. When we were together the last time, Edward kept trying to tell me to leave, and he also wanted me to stay. It had been like we had to rush into things, and some of it had to do with me. Picking up his letter, I re-read the part where he admitted about thinking I was too young to understand what I was asking. I had to remind myself that though he thought that way at the time, he didn't now, or did he? Going with him today was important so I could find out what was on his mind, and it looked like he was going to be honest, something I needed, to try and figure everything out.

A half hour later, once Carlie had nursed and was dressed in overall style shorts, wearing a purple shirt underneath, we made our way downstairs. Emmett and Jasper were sitting on one of the sofas to the left of the room, watching an action movie, though they both looked at us when we arrived. As she was prone to doing, Carlie hid her face against my shoulder, clutching at me with her little hands. "Hey, Emmett."

"Hi Bella. I'm glad to see you again."

After a moment he stood up and walked over, bending down as we hugged around my daughter. "Can I just say that I really want to kill my brother?" The expression on his face was gentle, but the tone of his voice was not.

"He knows how much he hurt me, or is starting to realize it. What is going to help is for us to be able to talk. I appreciate you wanting to go at him. If I could have at first, I would have." Both of us chuckled before he sat back down, while I took Carlie into the kitchen to feed her some breakfast.

Riding passenger in Edward's Volvo brought back the memories of all the times he had come to the house, after Charlie left, to take me to school. Carlie was content in her seat in back of the car, playing with her wind up kitty. Neither one of us had said anything since leaving the house, though it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. It seemed like we both had a lot on our mind.

The second Edward stopped the car in front of Charlie's house, the door opened and my dad was rushing to greet us. Luckily the sun wasn't shining, though Alice had assured us that it would be out later on this afternoon.

While Edward stayed in the car, I went around and opened the door, getting my daughter out of her seat. The second she saw her grandpa, she was laughing, leaning for him to take her, which he did an instant later.

"There's grandpa's girl." Dad lifted her above his head and she laughed kicking her legs before she was back in his arms.

Once he gave me a hug, and I let him know an estimated time of return, I watched as he took Carlie up to the house with her totally content in his arms. For some reason there was a small lump in my throat as I got back in the passenger seat.

"It's not easy leaving her behind."

For a second I nearly forgot Edward was the one doing the driving, and glanced up at him. "It never was. My choice to go to college after getting my GED wasn't easy either. Charlie kept saying I could go when she was older, but at the time, I felt that getting my education was going to be best for us both. Now it sort of feels selfish. Maybe it was because I was trying to get away from everything Victoria did for me. When she would sleep, I would almost always keep her in my arms, if only to focus on her instead of those memories."

"I wish I could kill her."

It wasn't a surprise to hear him admit that. "I wished it would have been you to find me. I was so out of it when Jake and his pack got to me, and even after I was in the hospital, there were times I imagined you right by my side. I'm glad that you said what you did in your letter, and it doesn't make me mad. There was a lot I didn't know and pushed aside in the desperation I felt to get you to accept me."

"Being put in a high school setting was difficult for me, more so than for my siblings. While they had one another, no one dared to lust after them. There were a few girls, like Jessica for example, who wanted me to notice her. The advantage I had, was knowing why."

Hearing him be so open about that was another surprise, and I had a feeling there would be many today. "Because of how you looked? I have to admit that was part of my reasoning at least when I was sitting there that first day. After we got to know one another, and after finding out who you were, there was this need to prove I could fit in. There was also the belief that I wasn't good enough for you. That's what hurt the most, when you turned your words around and said that too me. I had always believed that because I didn't look pretty, and wasn't very smart, that I was a waste of your time."

The car coming to a stop was unexpected, though as I looked, it was to the realization that we had arrived at the end of the road. His cool finger on the back of my hand drew my gaze from the front of the car to him. When he held my hand, I felt at ease.

"You are the smartest person I've ever known." He must have seen the disbelief in my eyes, because I felt like he was using that to try and win me over. "I'm not just saying that Bella. You knew what you wanted, and I was the one too narrow minded to realize that. For me, it was unbelievable that someone would want to be as I am."

"Because you didn't get to choose that." It was a statement more than a question.

"None of us did."

The day we had gone to the meadow, the first time, he had told me a little about when each of them had been turned, and if I thought about it, tried putting myself into his shoes given the circumstances, I could understand why he would be so against letting me become like him.

My door opened and his hand was there to help me out. From the trunk of his car, he pulled out a picnic basket and once I was on his back, he took off into the forest.

I'd forgotten what it was like to be flying through the woods. The first few times I'd been terrified we would run into a tree, or that a branch would knock me off of his back. Now the run was exhilarating.

**Edward**

Being back in our meadow had its own sort of magic. The first time we had come here, I had lain in the sun while Bella sat beside me, watching my skin glitter in the light. The feel of her finger tracing of my hand had been among many memories I'd held onto after leaving. Other memories came to mind of the last time we had been here and what we had done. How free I'd felt that day if only for a brief time.

"You look like you're a million miles away."

Her brown eyes melted into my own. "I was just recalling our first time here."

Bella nodded, smiling. "Seeing you the first time, it was breathtaking."

"Do you remember the rest, with me showing you my power?"

"Mmm hm. I also knew that you couldn't hurt me."

"You knew better than I did. Trusting myself with you that day, was frightening. I thought of what would happen if I slipped."

She kept her eyes on my own. "I would have been turned, and we wouldn't have our daughter. I'm glad you had the control to hold off, and I'm sorry I put you into that position. Don't tell me not to be sorry, there were things I did, stupid things that if I would have listened, I wouldn't have been put into danger. While I've been writing, I've thought about things like the ballet studio, and even our first time visiting here. I was so desperate to become like you, because I wanted to fit in. I wanted to belong."

"You do belong. You have Charlie, and our beautiful baby. You also have me when you're ready. I've been giving you time alone listening to what you need, but I've also needed time to think about the past. I told you once before that you are my first love. I've never felt this way, and as long as I've been around, I have no idea how to proceed."

Without a second thought, Bella reached out and took my hands. "Bringing me here today so we could talk was a very good idea. There is a part of me that just wants to tell you that I can just forget everything about you leaving, and about how we were, but all of the hurt from that, from feeling abandoned and the things Victoria did to me keeps that need in check. I just have to go slowly. Isn't it strange that we have a daughter and yet here we are sort of dating again."

"It's not strange at all. We need to take our time, this time."

"I couldn't agree more." As she took a bite of some fruit, Bella asked me what I'd done while I was away.

"For a while, I tracked Victoria down to a small city in South America, Amenia. There I lost track of her, and buried myself in the guilt I had over lying to you and twisting my words. I also thought about how you would be able to live a normal life."

Bella nodded. "So what future did you see for me?"

Having a way of instantly recalling memories was a curse at times. "I saw you becoming good friends with Angela, as well as making new friends. You graduated from high school, and went on to college, maybe with Angela and Ben. Someday you would have a family of your own."

"I have a family with Carlie, and maybe in another life going to college away would have been something I wanted, but this, being a mom, and getting time to really know you is what matters now. Thank you for telling me all of that."

Those words had not come easily. I was glad that what I had envisioned had not come to pass, and for the first time since coming back to Forks, there wasn't any guilt to wanting this time with her.

"What can you remember of your time before this?"

"It's funny you should ask that of me. Last night Carlisle was sharing his thoughts on when he first arrived in Chicago. He had gone to a park, and while he was thinking of all the beautiful nature around him, I also found in his thoughts the way couples were walking around him. In my time it was common place for a young man of seventeen to court a young woman. There would have been supervised visits with the girl I would have likely been set up to meet that girl by my parents. Through his thoughts I was able to recall a little of what the times were like. It was much simpler then. The war was going on, and I recall wanting to fight. That was a strong desire, because it's one of the only things I can remember clearly."

Bella nodded as a gentle breeze ruffled her brown hair. "Do you remember what your parents thought?"

"I would say my mother wouldn't have wanted me to go. My father, on the other hand, would have likely supported that, though only when I was of proper age."

"It must be difficult only having a few memories."

"Until recently, I haven't thought much of my past. I've been more focused on the day by day things."

When Bella told me she had passed through Chicago on one of her trips with Renee, I thought about the possibility of taking her there someday, even though it had been a long time since my last visit. "Being able to sit here and talk to you without the fears I used to have is more than I could ask for."

"It feels that way for me too. Before, it was like we had this whirlwind romance. For me looking back on it, being with you was due to this strong pull to connect. Now the urgency is gone, and I'm left with the time to try and work things out."

"Do you feel that we can do that?" My question seemed impulsive, but it was also one I'd wanted to ask her.

Bella nodded. "I think given time enough to start to heal, and the more times we have like this, we will figure things out. The hard part for me is how chaotic life gets once I'm back being a mom, and trying to figure out what comes next. I had been thinking about my continued education, and while going to college would be nice, Carlie isn't always going to be a baby. I want to be able to take care of her and not worry about anything else.

Her independence had me falling more in love with her. Even though she didn't want any monetary support, I was trying to think of how I could help. The moment I thought of her father, I remembered that her parents had divorced and had my answer. "Bella, when you were being raised by your mom, did she support you all on her own, financially?"

When I spoke the words, I had her attention. "No, Charlie sent child support. He never missed sending that money. When he could, like my failed attempt at ballet, he sent money for shoes and everything I would need." As she answered, it was evident by how rounded her eyes were becoming, that she was seeing where I was trying to go with this.

"If you were living with Carlie separate from me, you would be getting child support, just like when you were a child. I'm not sure what the state of Washington requires, but it would be very easy to find out. I love having you staying with me, and I hope you won't leave. If you keep staying here, we could figure up how much child support is and you could see if it is enough to be a full time mom to our daughter."

The smile on her face was my reward. "Can I hug you?"

My arms opened and she was in them instantly, sighing as she pressed her cheek against my shoulder. "Why didn't I think about that?"

"You have a lot on your mind," I murmured as I turned my head to breath in her sweet scent. All too soon she was sitting down across from me, leaning her head back as the warm wind blew against her face. She was a vision, my hope for a future.

When we got back to the house, Bella asked me to get Carlie from her seat, something I was more than happy to do. The second she was in my arms, our daughter smiled at me while patting at my cheeks. Inside, I heard the thoughts from Rosalie. They were calm, and curiously hopeful that Bella would talk to her. She and Emmett had been told what Bella was going through, and my sister was thinking of what had been done to her that prompted Carlisle to turn her.

"Bella?"

She had just gotten the picnic basket and glanced at me. "Rosalie is in the front room with Emmett. There are some things that happened to her that she might be able to share to help you, but only when you are ready."

"They know?"

Bella had given Jasper permission to tell them about Victoria, figuring that the sooner they knew everything the easier it would be, and less awkward. "Yes, and Jasper has asked both of them not to feel sorry, just as you asked."

When she closed her eyes, I shifted Carlie against my left shoulder before walking to her side. "Is the magic of our day disappearing?"

She nodded letting me put my free arm around her. "They won't say anything or ask anything until you're ready to bring it up on your own."

"I used to be so independent."

My arm pulled her closer before she turned and rested her cheek against the right side of my chest. Our baby reached out patting her momma's head causing Bella to laugh. "Thanks Carlie, Momma needed that." After she was more composed, we walked up to the house hand in hand. Inside, Carlie struggled to be let down and once she was on her feet, she made her way over to the piano, ready for me to play for her. Bella took over leading the way. Once she was seated to my left, and our daughter on my lap, my hands automatically moved over the ivory. It wasn't long before Rosalie and Emmett stood off to our left, all of us listening to the soothing tones of the song I was playing.

When the music came to an end, Carlie tilted her head back. Her eyes so much like mine had been, were focused on my own. "Mo."

Bella put her hand over her mouth, surprised by her new word as Carlie remained looking at me. "Do you want more music?"

"Mo, Mo"

After kissing her forehead and turning to hug Bella, only for a moment, I began to play at my daughter request, having them to myself as Emmett led Rosalie upstairs.

**Authors Notes**: _Thank you for reading the last chapter and for all the wonderful reviews. If you didn't realize what Carlie meant by **Mo,** pronounced **Mow**, as in mow the lawn, It is More. For those of you who realize that, you can say DUH, just don't say it in the review...HA..I had a lot of fun having Emmett around, and per requests I tried my best not to make Rosalie too snooty. Also a few POV changes that needed to happen to keep it in one chapter. Hope you like this chappy, and please feel free to review. I'll do my best to respond._


	10. Bonds and Friendships

**Chapter 10: Bonds and Friendships**

**Bella**

It had been a few days since my visit to the meadow with Edward. Since that time we had talked about what had happened in the past. He had admitted that he didn't realize just how hurt I would be when he left. There were still some grey areas that we had yet to discuss, but we had time, and both of us were doing better about being honest.

Sitting in Carlisle's office, I was talking about what Edward had mentioned of not considering the emotional pain I would be in when he left.

"When I turned Edward, he was seventeen. While he has lived 111 years, and has studied and learned a great deal in terms of higher education, there are things like emotional development that can't be taught. In some small way he just didn't know how difficult it was going to be for you. Now that Edward has returned, and you have had a chance to open up to him about all that has happened, he is realizing that his original assumptions were very wrong. I feel responsible for not talking to him sooner about how you would take to our abrupt departure from your life."

"It wasn't your fault. Is he capable of growing emotionally? What I mean is can he really know what he put me through?"

"With time he will began to understand that better. As a vampire, we are all selfish beings at first. Finding our other half, causes a change in us, to think for someone aside from ourselves. Is this difficult to understand?"

"A little. It's hard because of how much pain I went through and how much hurt is still there. He says he wants to take care of me, but what if he gets tired of that. My worry keeps me from trusting him fully.

"Give it time Bella. I'm already seeing change in him. When we talk he's asking questions now about what he can do to help you. It has been a long time since my son has asked me for my help."

We talked for a while longer before I left his office, ready to go up to my room to write a few things down. Upstairs, I heard Carlie's laughter coming from the playroom. As difficult as it was, I resisted the urge to go see what was causing such happiness in her, knowing if I did go, I wouldn't want to write in my journal. She was with Edward, and had been for the hour and a half Carlisle and I had been talking. Sitting down on the bed, I took the notebook from the bedside table and wrote down a few things that Carlisle had given me to think on.

One aspect of Edward that I hadn't really considered was how his mind worked as far as the emotional understating of another person. If I looked back on our relationship, things happened that were quite impulsive, including that day in the meadow when Carlie was conceived. He fought to control that side of him, including his blood lust. Since his return, my thoughts had been on my pain. It hadn't occurred to me to ask him how it was for him being around me, or even Carlie. Was the blood lust just as bad for him as it had been the last time?

Our first visit to the meadow, I had asked about things I could do to make it easier on him, like wearing long sleeved shirts, and not exposing my neck to him. What was it really like having me around now? Those were all things I needed to ask him. He was willing to be with me, that much was sure. Thinking over the past week, he had spent a lot of time hunting with the family. Maybe that was a way he was trying to handle his thirst.

"Momma."

Carlie toddled into the room wearing only her diaper as Edward followed her, holding a shirt in one hand and her jeans in the other.

"She's been coming in here frequently to see if you had returned," Edward explained, as our daughter arrived by the side of the bed.

When I lifted her into my arms, she snuggled against my shoulder. "Did you let her get away?"

He smiled, nodding as he laid her clothes down in front of me. "How was your talk?"

"Good. He gave me quite a bit to think on, and also some questions that I want to ask you when we have the time," Carlie was still for me as I got her clothes back on. Once she was dressed, she was ready for me to nurse her. Edward walked over to the other side of the bed and sat down as she got settled in my arms.

"What would you like to know?"

Before I could respond, Carlie's hand patted my mouth, and when I nibbled her fingers she smiled at me, continuing to want my attention. "Maybe we should try later," I answered as her fingers patted on my chin."

Once he was gone, my full attention was on the sweet baby in my arms. "You are getting big. I need to go see grandpa and get your growth chart." My baby's eyes were fixed on my face, and as I finished talking, she pulled away from me. "Momma."

"What Carlie?"

Her answer was a big smile showing her teeth, reminding me that I needed to ask Carlisle about tooth care for her, or if that was something I needed to worry about. As she began to nurse again, her fingers wound around some of my hair while her green eyes focused on me. After crossing my legs in front of me, I began to rock her, humming a variation of my lullaby. It wasn't long before her lids began to droop. When she pulled away and rubbed her eyes, I laid her down on her side before sliding next to her humming, and nursing her until she went to sleep. These times with Carlie were my way of drawing strength to face what was ahead.

Once I'd put my angel in the crib, I left the room, going across the hall to the playroom. Everything was in its proper place. There were a few additional things. A fancy doll crib was on the right wall close to her stove. There was also a wooden rocking chair, Carlie's size, along with a doll sleeping in the crib. Carlie had two Aunts who were excited to get to know her, along with her Mimi, Esme. I was beginning to understand the excitement for them being able to buy things for her. As I looked back at the doll crib, I remembered never having an interest in dolls. Reading book after book was what I had liked.

As I turned towards the door, Edward arrived. "Do you want to talk?" When I nodded, we sat down on the daybed.

"What were you going to ask?"

How is your blood lust since we've been together?"

"It hasn't been too bad. I've been hunting more, but more than just that, there has been a change for me. Being away from you was more difficult than any separation from anyone I've ever experienced. Being back with you, the difference is my control is amazing. I'm able to focus on my feelings of love along with the need to keep you safe from the standpoint of my being around you. I've been able to push that blood lust away, and keep my focus on how much I care for and love you. With Carlie there is no desire or hunger, not just for me but for the rest of us. She doesn't appeal to us in that way."

His explanation, more especially concerning Carlie was a huge relief. "Carlisle said that being around me is more difficult, in the way of understanding my emotions."

"It used to be. I've lived my entire existence as a vampire focusing on my wants and needs. If I did something on impulse, like leaving Carlisle so I could hunt humans, at first I didn't care. I was angry at him for trying to keep me on the vegetarian diet My selfishness also kept me from understanding your feelings.

"Your diet was human blood?" He nodded. "What made you return?"

"Knowing that what I was doing was ultimately wrong. Carlisle had been right all along. I'd also reasoned with myself that at first, taking human lives wasn't wrong. The lives I took were all of men who would have killed other people. I had it in my mind that I was doing some good. The problem was, that I had no right to judge who would die and who would live. Even with the crimes they might have committed, it wasn't up to me to be their judge and ultimately their executioner."

Trying to picture him with red eyes, wasn't something I could do. I'd known him after that time. The only red eyes I saw were Victoria's. "The way all of you choose to live is wonderful. It will be a good example for Carlie when she's old enough to see that." Thinking of our daughter brought more questions to my mind. "Is there a way for us to know if she's going to be quick enough to hunt like you do?"

Edward nodded. "I've been looking online at old legends. None of them fit with how she is, but they had to begin somewhere. Carlisle is also researching. He wants a way to monitor her development more accurately."

Emmett's sudden appearance at the entry to the room was a surprise. He had a determined look on his face, as did Edward when I looked at him. A moment later, Emmett left us, leaving me curious to what he had just thought to his brother. Fortunately I didn't have to wait long for an answer.

"Emmett wants to know if you and Carlie want to come to a ballgame tomorrow evening. Alice said that the weather will be right."

It had been a long time since I'd gone to a game, and the idea of watching them play along with our little girl was appealing. "The noise might startle her."

"Let me talk to Alice, she might have some idea of how we can protect her ears."

After he had gone, I went back to my room looking down on my baby as she slept. Going out with the rest of the Cullens would be nice. We were limited to where we could go in order to keep people from realizing that all of them were back.

As I sat down on the bed, I thought about what it would be like for me, if and when I chose to be turned. Actually it was when. Being turned was something I'd debated while Edward was gone. Now that they were back, and our daughter was taking blood, along with the subtle differences in her such as lower body temperature, I had to wonder if she was going to live longer than a normal human. Having her outlive me was not an option. And the need to be able to protect her if something happened was also a powerful factor. Slowly, I was starting to figure things out, and more importantly I was beginning to realize that maybe I could trust Edward this time around.

The day of the game, two packages arrived via Fed-Ex. Carlie was on the floor in the front room watching Emmett and Jasper making a tower out of her Duplo building blocks. The structure was as complex as they could make it given the large size of the blocks. Rosalie was sitting next to her handing her different bricks of her own while I sat on one of the sofa's looking over some of my journal entries.

Across from where I was sitting, Alice had her laptop on her knees, and was typing something really fast. When she suddenly stopped and glided to the door, my eyes followed her wondering what was going on. From the back end of the house, Edward walked into the room along with Carlisle and Esme.

A moment later Alice was handed two packages by the delivery man, both taken immediately by Edward before he came and sat down next to me.

"What's this?"

He only smiled as he slit the smaller package open with his finger nails. From it he pulled out a box with a picture of earmuffs. "This is for Carlie to wear tonight." He put it on my lap before opening the larger of the two packages. From that box he pulled out another box with a picture of a backpack. "This is for you, or me to wear with Carlie inside during our walk through the forest."

In front of us, Alice was smiling, and I knew she had been busy, but didn't mind. Carlie did need something to protect her ears, and having a carrier like the one Edward was now removing from the box was going to be very convenient.

"Momma."

Our baby walked over, instantly investigating the boxes that were now on the floor.

"Do you want to try it on?" Edward asked, drawing my attention to him and the carrier. When I stood up he helped me get it on my back. It fit around me comfortably, and I could envision carrying our baby in it. I could also see him doing the same. "Why don't you try it on?"

After removing it from my shoulders and back, he slipped it on easier than I had. Once he had it in place, I leaned over and lifted our baby from the floor. "Kneel down a second."

Once Carlie was settled in the carrier, she began to pat her daddy's head and laughed as he started to walk around gently bouncing her. The carrier was going to be a success, and my excitement of the coming evening was growing.

"Hey, that's pretty neat. Do you mind if I try it?"

"Emmett, you're too big to fit in there," Jasper said. The two of them began to wrestle, and I moved over to where Edward was as Esme called for them to take it outside, which they did. Their antics were something I remembered from the last time. Emmett had a competitive streak. Idly I wondered what it would be like once I was turned.

My daughter's screech meant she was done being in the carrier. Once she was in my arms, Edward took if off setting it near the front door for use later.

"Mo, Mo. Da da, mo" Carlie clapped her hands and leaned towards her daddy when he came back for her. While he took her to play the piano, I headed into the kitchen to get a snack prepared, including preparing a cup of blood. My first time doing that had come this morning. Everyone had gone out hunting after being sure I was going to be alright in the house alone. I'd worried about being able to stomach getting the blood ready, finding that I could when I told myself that it was what my baby needed.

"May I help?" Rosalie asked.

"Sure, if you don't mind slicing up this apple, and peeling the skin off, that would be great."

While she did that I got out some yogurt and a banana and was putting that on the counter as Rosalie finished. She was also finished with the banana before I could get out the cup to put the blood in.

"If you don't mind getting out a bowl to mix the yogurt with the fruit." Rosalie worked fast and set things on the table as I brought the cup. "Thanks."

"You're welcome. How are you doing?" We both sat down, having some time to talk because the piano was still playing. It felt awkward having Rosalie's help when before she had always seemed angry at me.

"I'm beginning to do better. Before, I was having horrible dreams with what happened. Now that I'm here, and have someone I can tell everything too, as well has writing it all out, the dreams have stopped."

"That helped me a little too. After I was turned, and after everything had happened that caused us to have to leave, Carlisle urged me over and over to write down what I was feeling. I had a lot of self-pity, and resisted what he wanted. Finally I got sick of him reminding me, and did that."

"What happened, if you don't mind me asking?"

Edward came in before she could start. He got the snack I'd made for the baby and after leaning in to kiss the top of my head he left again.

Rosalie smiled at me. "He's finally taking some responsibility."

"I know. It's different and nice."

"I had a happy human life…" She told me what growing up had been like. How she had wanted for nothing and how she met the man she was going to be wed too. The happy picture she was telling me turned to tragedy, and I felt my own sadness mixing in with her story. How was it that people, human or vampire could be so mean? It wasn't fair to her that Royce had attacked her and stood by letting his buddies have at her, leaving her for dead. Now it was understandable why she would have been angry at me the first time around.

"I'm so sorry."

"Don't be. There are times I don't like being this way because of all the things I missed, but other times I think about Emmett. If I wouldn't have been turned, he would not have been saved. I'm the one who found him."

"Is it hard for you, with Carlie around?"

She glanced away from me for a second. "It is. When we got here and it was explained what happened. I was really upset. Carlisle had to remind me that I was dying and there would not have been a way to save me, if he hadn't have acted when he did. It still hurts, and I'm not blaming you or my brother, well maybe Edward."

When she laughed, I found myself joining her. This whole conversation was so surreal. After we talked, I went to the front room. Carlie was on Emmett's back with Edward holding her steady as he crawled around on all fours. Another moment to lock into my head during the times I was feeling down. Who would have thought that a big vampire like Emmett would be capable of playing horse with my baby girl.

A few hours before dusk, we set out for the ball field. Carlie and I sat in the back of the jeep, both of us well strapped in, while Edward drove. The rest of the family had gone ahead of us to get things set up. Our baby was clapping her hands as we began our way on the bumpy path. "Do you like this?"

"Momma da da."

"He is a crazy driver, isn't he?"

"I heard that," Edward called back to us as Carlie laughed along with me. There was something about being out of the house that had me feeling light and free. Twenty minutes later we arrived near the field and after we got out, and Edward had the carrier on, I settled Carlie inside.

"So how are you guys dividing teams?"

Before he answered he reached for my hand and I took it. "Emmett Alice and Carlisle will be on one team, Jasper Rosalie, and me on the other.

"That sounds fair to me. Why doesn't Esme play?" I'd noticed that in the few games I attended she was comfortable catching the ball for either team.

"She is there to keep us honest."

I wondered if when I turned she would actually try playing, though maybe not since someone would need to sit out with Carlie. When we reached the rest of the family, I took notice of the huge blanket that had been spread out along with several of Carlie's toys. Edward knelt down and as I lifted Carlie out, our baby began to cry and shake her head.

"Shh, you will get to be in there again, and this game is going to be fun for you to watch," I tried, but she continued to cry even as I sat down to show her the toys.

It was only when I got out some goldfish crackers, when she began to settle down. While the rest of the family warmed up, I got Carlie's ear muffs out of her diaper bag. When they were ready to play, I put them on her while she was drinking from her cup pointing at her daddy as he was the first one up to bat.

The ball Alice pitched was so fast I couldn't really see anything except a blur. Even so, Edward hit it just as the thunder rumbled overhead. The ball zoomed nearly to the forest as he raced to first base, and was half way to second when Esme whistled. Carlisle had caught the ball.

In my lap, Carlie was now transfixed on what was going on, and I wondered if she could see the ball better than me. When Edward's team switched to the fields, he left and came up to us.

Carlie reached for him, laughing when he tossed her in the air. That took my breath away, and I managed not to freak out by reminding myself that she was safe. "Can she see the ball?"

He looked down at me. "I'm not sure. She was watching us pretty closely."

"Come on," Emmett bellowed.

The game went on until well after dark, and by the time it ended, with Edward's team winning the game, Carlie was still awake, but just barely. Alice came over with Edward and Esme and while he put the carrier on, I stood up cradling my baby against my chest while she rubbed at her eyes. This time when I went to put her in the pack, she kicked her legs and started to cry. "I'll just carry her," I told him, not wanting to upset her.

"What did you think of the game?" He held my hand again as we went back to the jeep.

"Exciting as it always is. I wonder if this one will be able to play with you." I said, while kissing the top of Carlie's head.

"There is already talk of getting her a glove for her next birthday or for Christmas, that is if you approve." The idea of our daughter playing baseball seemed like a long way off, but I could also see that for her, someday. "Maybe hold off for a year or two. She's just learned how to walk."

He nodded. Getting our baby into her seat was tough even with Edward's round about method. Carlie was pitching a fit. Even when we began bumping our way through the forest, she kept up the screaming until she had to stop due to coughing. When we got on the main road, we were flying. Normally I wouldn't have appreciated the speed, but with Carlie's screams and the way she struggled to get out of her seat, I was all for speed to get us home.

Her tantrum continued when I got her out of the car, and even as I tried to let Edward take her, she didn't settle down in his arms. In our room, Edward held her while I got her undressed and had to hold her arms and legs as I got her into a clean diaper and her sleeper. Normally by the time she was dressed for the evening, she would start to calm down. Tonight she was in full rage, and I began to feel the panic that came when I couldn't settle her down.

The introduction to soft music playing from Edward's stereo system filled the room, before he came over to the bed where I was resting beside our daughter. Against the mattress, she was kicking her legs and screaming.

"Do you mind if I try something?"

"Please."

He got her polar fleece blanket draped over his chest first, before picking up her bunny and then her. Carlie leaned backward screaming more, so Edward moved his hand against the back of her head and neck while the other hand supported the small of her back and bottom before he began to waltz with her. For a little longer she continued struggle in his arms . As I was about to suggest a warm bath, Carlie stopped trying to push away from her father, grasping at her bunny before she was resting against his chest, rubbing her face against the blanket.

Her breathing was erratic, and my heart ached as she gasped for breath. Edward held out one hand for me and a moment later I was hugging him around our daughter as we swayed with her. Carlie's breathing finally evened out as a new instrumental piece began playing. I rested my cheek against her back trying not to feel guilty for letting her stay up so late.

"Momma."

When she lifted her head, I moved away from her daddy. After kissing her wet cheeks, he put her in my arms. Once I was resting in the bed with Carlie on my left nursing, Edward told us he would be back later.

"No, stay with us."

I held my hand behind me until I felt the bed shift before his body was against my own. "She's never been so angry, not even at the hospital."

"The next game won't go on as long," he whispered.

"I didn't know what to do with her. She didn't want me to hold her, and she was angry lying on the bed. I don't know why I didn't think of dancing with her like we just did. It's times like this when I feel like I'm doing everything wrong."

"Seeing her so angry both in the car on the way back and just a little bit ago wasn't easy for me either. I wasn't sure dancing with her was going to work. I guess we just have to learn what is going be best, as different situations present themselves with her."

"Do you think I hold her too much?"

"Not at all. She'll be more confident and more willing to come to you when she's having trouble, because of the love you give to her now."

"I don't remember too much about being little. There are some memories of taking a nap, or mom putting me down for a nap, and telling me to go to sleep before she left me alone. I'd always sneak and get a book to look at until I was tired enough to sleep. Later on she needed to be taken care of. A part of me feels this need to let you in, to trust that you're going to take care of me when I'm hurting. Then I think about how independent I've been and push that idea away. Now having you with us makes me feel safe." It was all so confusing at times, and that frustrated me.

"Being here with you feels right to me. Being able to spend time with both of you means so much. I've felt alone for a long time, and I hated who I was. I felt like a monster lurking in the shadows and it was more so when we met. You were so full of life and it looked like you had a plan."

"Not much of one. I wanted to graduate from Forks, and find my own way, but what I was going to do was a mystery, and it still is in respects to going to college and choosing a major."

Carlie shifted on her back and after covering myself, up I rolled over to face Edward. "How did you figure out what to do, once you got back to Carlisle and Esme?"

Edward reached out and tucked a strand of hair away from my face. "Carlisle suggested that I find something I wanted to learn. He was working at the hospital, and one day I came home from hunting and found a few of his medical journals on the dining room table. He had left them there hoping I'd read them which I did. Not much later I enrolled in college. First my focus was on a major in Math and Science."

"And them medical school?

"Yes. I've graduated two times with a medical degree, and interned with Carlisle once. By that time Alice and Jasper had joined us, and the story you are familiar with, of us being adopted by Esme and Carlisle began, as did our high school careers."

When I yawned, he traced his finger over my cheek. "Try and sleep."

"Stay until I am."

When he nodded I turned over and moved closer to my daughter, letting the fun part of the day have free reign in my mind until sleep took over.

**Authors** **Notes**: _First as always, thank you all for reading my story. This chapter took a little longer to write, because I started to rush things, and I'm doing my best not too. I'm with the few of you who have written about Rosalie being nicer, and I like the idea of her and Bella, along with Alice of course, being friends. _

_Thank you all for the reviews and the new adds to various lists. I'll update again soon, may not be until Tuesday night, but there will be something new at that point. _


	11. Charlie's Questions

**Chapter 11: Charlie's Questions**

**Bella**

Driving my truck over to Charlie's house, without my daughter, felt strange. There wasn't anything for me to worry about. Carlie was being well looked after by Edward, and if he needed anything Esme was also there to lend a hand. It may have been because Esme was there that I left her behind. Call it petty, but I wasn't ready to leave Carlie alone with just her father, even if he was good at taking care of her. It would be interesting to see what Jasper thought when I got back to the house and we had our talk. Carlisle was away, seeing if he could track the boy he had met that was so much like Carlie. He was heading for England without Esme. Edward explained that there was a ruling class in the vampire society, and that while they lived and ruled from Italy, Carlisle and Esme didn't want to raise any red flags for me and the baby. He also told me that they made Victoria look like a Saint, so I knew that those vampires were not to mess with.

When I pulled up in front of the house, Charlie was outside washing his cruiser, which was odd, because he had been working days again since Carlie and I moved out. As I got out of the truck, he went to the other side expecting to see the baby. "You left her with him?"

"With Edward along with his mother, yes." That seemed to satisfy him, but not by much. "Why are you home?"

"Deputy Marks needs to work days for a few weeks, so I traded with him, but I'm on call."

I nodded while heading up to the house. Inside I went up to my old room finding everything as I had left it. What I did notice right away was that there wasn't a speck of dust on my bedside table or on the dresser. Someone had been doing some cleaning, and I tried not to feel guilty about not coming by more often to visit. Being over there, talking to Jasper and Carlisle, journaling, taking care of Carlie and getting to know Edward better took my time away from being here.

In the bottom drawer of the dresser, I took out Carlie's baby book before walking over to the rocking chair. The last time I'd made an update was the week before we left to see my mom in Florida. Flipping to the back of the book, I pulled out her growth chart and unfolded it. From what I could see she had grown some, which was encouraging.

"How are you two doing over there?" Charlie had caught me off guard, and I jumped as he walked in and sat down at the end of the bed.

"It's going pretty good. She has learned how to say the word more, which she says as mo, and she is saying Momma, and Da. She's also walking better."

Charlie nodded. "What about you?"

"It's different being back there. I've talked a little to Carlisle about some of the things that have caused me stress, like getting lost in the woods. When Carlie got sick, I sort of fell apart one night, and told Edward about not dealing with a lot of things. It's kind of why we are over there. Anyway I'm keeping a journal and it is helping to get it all out of my mind and deal with it."

"I'm glad you are working on that. Bella, I've been worrying about you."

His concern had been something I had expected. "What worries you?"

Charlie stood up and began to pace. "It feels like you are jumping into this too fast. I understand why you went there once Carlie was released. She was still getting over being so sick, and having Carlisle in the same house with the two of you was a good idea. The other day when I had her, she was all over the place, as you said, walking around trying to talk more than she ever has." Charlie stopped pacing to stand in front of me. "You don't come over at all. You just told me you had a break down in the hospital, which I get. Everything happened so fast after we found you. Carlie was born and your focus went to her care. Now it's like I'm watching it all over. You're staying there; when it's here you should be staying."

It was the longest I'd heard Charlie talk in a long time. What he said made sense to someone who wasn't in the know. It was that which he didn't know that I couldn't tell him. Being at the Cullens, I was free to talk about what I was feeling. There wasn't the need to make excuses when I needed to go to my room because of the need cry over something stupid. My eyes shut as I took in a few deep breaths. "It isn't like the first time, dad. He's keeping his promise, we both are. I'm not romantically involved with him. He is learning how to take care of Carlie, and trying to be a part of her life. It's not something he can do if I'm here, and I'm not ready to let her have an overnight anywhere that is without me."

Charlie nodded and began to pace again. There was more, and I took in a few more breaths praying that I could hold on until it was time to go. "There's something else. Carlisle seems the same to me."

His statement came as a shock and I pulled myself together real quick. "Same?"

"Well, he doesn't look much different than he did the last time they were here. I've got a few more gray hairs, and some spots on my head where my hair is thinning. Billy's lost a little weight. Sue gets prettier every time I see her. But Doctor Cullen looks the same. Is he using Botox or something?"

I laughed, feeling relief as he finished. "He might be dad."

Charlie just frowned at me, and I got up grabbing my things. "I've got to get back to the baby. I'll try and come by with her this weekend."

Before he could say anything I couldn't laugh my way out of, I was in my car pulling out of the driveway. My laughter nearly had me running the truck off the road before I got to the end of the neighborhood. Once I was more composed, my mind began to race. His talk with me, especially the last part shouldn't have been that funny. He was starting to notice things. Maybe going back to the house would be safer for Edward and his family. I could still take Carlie over during the days, once he went back to working days. By the time I pulled into their long driveway, my stomach was churning and my nerves were shot.

At the house, Edward was on the porch and started towards my truck as I stopped, shutting my eyes, doing what I could to compose myself. Was I overreacting? A sudden wave of calm washed over me. Jasper was on the porch just as Edward got my door open for me. Even though I felt at ease, there was still the question of how I was going to talk about this.

"How was your visit?" Edward's eyes were on me, and he was trying to keep calm for my sake.

"I need to talk to Jasper alone."

He nodded before reaching out his hand. I took it, squeezing it tight as we walked towards the house. Inside I could hear the pot being played by my baby, and thought real seriously about just putting it all off, taking her up to our room, and spending the rest of the day alone with her. Another wave of calm washed over me and with Edward's hand still in my own, we walked together to the back of the house. At Carlisle's office, I let his hand go, at the last minute reaching for him. His arms around me felt like a cocoon of safety. I could get lost easily in his hug, but steeled myself for letting go. Once I had, he turned and walked the way we had come, while I entered the study with Jasper behind me.

As I sat on the sofa, trying to think on what to say, Jasper waited at the door, giving me time to think. I still felt calm, and was grateful for his gift. "Charlie asked a lot of questions, mostly about why I'm still staying here with Carlie. He knows from her last visit that she's doing better, and he feels that my home is there. What he doesn't want to see is a repeat of the last time. I did tell him that I've been speaking to Carlisle over the stress that I went through when they thought I was lost in the woods. Charlie doesn't know that I was taken by Victoria."

Jasper nodded and sat down across from me. "You were very upset when you got back. I felt it before you even pulled into the drive."

It was evident that he knew there was more, and I didn't mind that he was calling me out on that. "He also said that Carlisle looked the same to him. Charlie told me that he's changed in the past two years, Billy has, Sue has. Then he asked if Carlisle was taking Botox injections."

Again I found myself laughing in midst of my stress. Even Jasper joined in, and I had a feeling that was going to be a family joke, not just for Carlisle. Once the laughter stopped, I found myself fidgeting with my hands. "Maybe I need to move back. Edward can still see Carlie when my dad is working and I can come by with her some."

"But you don't want to do that."

I sighed, "No, I don't. Being here I can talk about why I'm upset. Most of the time it has to do with the past, or worrying that Carlie will do something that can't be explained away. There is also the added concern of keeping Charlie safe from your ruling vampires. He knows about Jacob and his pack. He knows about the Cold Ones. I keep wondering when he's going to put all of that together, and how he'll react. With Billy being his best friend and Sue's husband before he died, it was a little easier for him to accept it. How much danger am I putting your family in?" I finally said it and felt my sorrow building. This time there was no blast of calm. When Jasper felt it was necessary, he let my feelings play out.

"In cases like this we discuss what we need to do. What you need to know and hold on to is that none of us are leaving you alone. It won't happen that way."

He handed me a Kleenex and I blotted my wet eyes. "If it's safer for you to go?"

"If you were really strong enough and ready for that. If it was something you honestly wanted us to do, not because of the need to keep us safe, but because you knew you were comfortable staying here on your own, we would consider it."

"I'm afraid to say anything to Edward, and he likely now knows."

"He's hunting with Emmett to give you privacy, and I'm not going to let him read what's on my mind, not until you are ready for that, or until you talk to him on your own. My brother won't force this either."

"But will he blame this on you guys being around? Will he say that he should not have come back, because I'm not going to handle that very well if he does."

Our conversation went on for a while longer, with Jasper's assurance that Edward would be honest, and that if those words came out of his mouth, he and Emmett would deal with him. Once we finished talking, and I went to the kitchen and got Carlie, we went up to our room. Since my baby had already had lunch including her sippy cup, I got her changed and laid on the bed with her letting her nurse while I thought about my conversation with Jasper. This wasn't my fault, nor was it any of theirs. Charlie's eyes had been opened to the differences in the world, that shape shifting werewolves were as real as anything else.

Once my baby was asleep, I covered up and shut my eyes needing to rest after the stress I'd just gone through.

"Momma."

My eyes opened to a happy girl sitting next to me. Carlie's hair was sticking up every which way. She laughed as I let her sit down on my stomach with her little legs hanging over each side. "We didn't sleep very long, and Momma didn't close the shades did I?"

"Momma."

"What is it sweet girl."

Carlie giggled before she leaned over, wanting off of the bed. Before letting her go I checked her diaper and found she was still dry. I held her left hand as she led the way out of our room. In her playroom, my hand was dropped as she picked up the pace, almost running until she was at her stove pulling out a mini pot which she put on one of the burners. "Who taught you that?"

When I knelt down next to her she took the pot and put it on another burner. As she did that I got out a bowl and put a plastic chicken leg in it before opening the little over to put that in. Carlie turned on the timer and began to jiggle around when the music came on and the stove top range lit up. It was so cute watching her try to dance around, and my mood had lightened since taking a nap.

Once the music went off, Carlie opened the oven and took out the bowl giving me the chicken. "Hmm hmm, this is so yummy."

"Mmm. Um."

"Yes it is yummy." My smile stretched across my face as she said those words again. She was picking things up so much quicker. Was this all because she was finally getting the one thing in her diet that I'd just missed all together?

We played for a little longer, until she did her little run trot to the door. I caught up to her at the safety gate, which she was trying to pull open.

"Should we go see if your daddy is home?"

"DA Da."

Carlie let me carry her down the steps, though when we got to the bottom, she was wiggling to be put down. The only one in the front room was Alice. She was filling vases with fresh flowers. "Where is everyone?"

I sat down on the floor with Carlie, while Alice continued to fill vases. "Emmett and Rosalie are in the garage working on her car, Esme is in the garden, and Edward is on his way from Carlisle's office.

Glancing to my left, I smiled as he entered the room. He joined me on the floor, while Carlie pushed her little dog away from her, laughing as he rolled across the floor causing his ears to flop.

"Charlie was full of questions today."

His eyes went from watching Carlie, to watching me. In them I saw only encouragement, so I went on. "He is worried that I'm jumping back into this too fast by staying here. Charlie believes since Carlie is doing better, we should go back. I don't want to do that because of a lot of reasons. I've always been afraid that Carlie would do something so extraordinary, that there wouldn't be a way to push it off. He also told me that it doesn't seem to him like Carlisle has changed, but he also thinks your father is taking Botox Injections."

Hearing Edward's sudden laughter eased the tension I was feeling for telling him all of this. As we both stopped laughing he reached out and took my right hand. "All this means is that we just have to be sure he doesn't see too much of us, and that is easily taken care of. Have you thought about going to visit him more often?"

"I did, but I'm not so much inclined if he's going to keep asking me things I'm not ready to answer, and if he keeps pushing for me and Carlie to go back. It's different now, being here with you all. I don't feel like I have to hide my feelings. If I get upset and it has to do with bad memories or whatever the reason, I've got you, Jasper, and Carlisle to talk to. I can tell you the truth and not have to make up some sort of variation of what happened."

As I finished talking, Carlie walked over and sat on her daddy's lap, tilting her head up so she could see him. "Da."

"Yes Carlie."

"Mo Da, mo."

Edward looked at me and as I nodded he stood up taking Carlie to the piano to play her a song. Before I could get up, Alice sat down in her brother's place. "We are all happy to have you with us. Leaving was such a mistake." The piano music drifted around us, soft melodies that were nice to hear.

"It's something to learn from. I'm glad you all came back, even Edward. Do you want to go walk?"

Alice stood up so fast, I didn't really register the movement. When I glanced over at Edward his head nodded, which I took to mean that he didn't mind us leaving him alone with Carlie. Alice led the way to one of the side doors, away from our daughter's vision and a second later we were heading towards the back of the house. "Carlisle explained to me that with Edward being turned at 17, it's not as likely that he will develop emotionally. To me he seems to really have changed. Telling him about Charlie, I was worried he would freak out and try and take over."

"I think it may be part of that, but a bigger factor is that until you he's been able to do what he needs. In public we all have to be careful. Here, or when it is just us, we can show off, or in Edward's case he can be impulsive and take off sometimes without very much warning."

Her words brought to mind another time when he had run, or may have. "He did that the day we met in Biology class."

"Yes. He was so angry about his reaction towards you, that instead of trying to stay and talk it out, he left, which I guess may have been the better thing. Then there was the time he kept the car from hitting you."

We were walking along the river, and I noticed it wasn't as warm here, but it was still nice. "Have any of you struggled enough that you needed to go away?"

"Not from the family. Emmett had his moment, and we all moved. Jasper has had a few times that have caused us to move. I think for my brother, it's just a lot harder because he's never had anyone else that causes him to react the way he does with you, and it's a good thing that he has you."

Talking to Alice was something I'd missed when they were gone. Getting to know her better was and added perk to them being back.

A few days later, Carlisle came back from England. It was just after Carlie had gone down for the night, sleeping in her crib for the time being. In the kitchen, I was sitting on the counter while Edward scooped out some Dark Chocolate Fudge Ice-Cream into my bowl. We had spent the last few hours outside with Carlie, hiking close to the river. The path wasn't too overgrown, and he held my hand as we talked, and Carlie took in the view from the carrier on his back. Once my ice-cream was ready, I began to slide from the counter when his hands wrapped around my waist before he helped me to the ground. Slowly my trust in him was building and times when it was just the two of us, were ones I liked the most.

At the table he sat down in a chair next to me as I took the first sweet cool bite of my treat. "There is nothing in the world like chocolate ice-cream.

"I don't remember if I had a favorite. More than likely it was plain vanilla."

I nodded. "Do you miss eating food?"

"At first, perhaps, but now the way we eat there isn't much to miss." It looked like he was about to say something else when Emmett poked his head into the kitchen.

"Hey, Carlisle wants to talk to us about his trip."

As he left, I got up getting my bowl before taking Edward's outstretched hand. In the front room, we took a seat on one of the longer sofa's next to Alice and Jasper.

Carlie and Esme sat on a smaller sofa to the left of ours while Rosalie and Emmett sat over by the piano. This was the first time I'd been included in a family meeting, and it made me feel that much more a part of them than every before.

Carlisle began by telling us that he had begun his journey by going to Oxford, just to see if there were any other writings on children like Carlie. "Most of what I did find fits what the legends say about the Cambian, and none of that even comes close to the truth as far as my meeting the young boy and his mother, and Carlie." When Laurent told me about my pregnancy, the internet had become my source for information. One of the legends among many were on the Cambian, children of a vampire and a human that were born without a heartbeat. In the beginning, I had feared having a stillborn baby. Carlie was proof that the legends were just made up. "Unfortunately, I was unable to track them down. The home they had lived in is gone now, replaced by newer homes in the area." Carlisle looked over at me. "I'm sorry I don't have any other answers."

"Thank you for trying." I glanced at Edward, wanting to bring up my worries about Charlie. Even though he'd thought of Botox as the reasoning for Carlisle's unchanged appearance, there was still concern.

"While you were away, Bella went to her father's. He brought up that you hadn't changed very much." Before Edward could get any further, Jasper chuckled drawing attention over to him.

"Evidently Charlie is under the impression that you are taking Botox injections."

Emmett was the first one who began to howl in laughter, followed by the rest of us. It made me feel a little embarrassed and as I felt my cheeks redden, Edward's arm went around my shoulder.

The laughter eventually subsided to a few chuckles and some jokes, which were going to last a while. Carlisle got up and walked over to where I was sitting holding out his hand. "We just need to be careful with your father." To the rest of his family as he looked around, he said. "As for the rest of us, we need to stay close to home. Any traveling needs to be done at night only"

To my relief there wasn't any argument, and as I finished off my ice-cream, everyone began to break off into couples, leaving me on the sofa next to Edward.

There were things on my mind already, like how selfish it felt for them to have to stay close to home and miss out on going out during the day to wherever they wanted. When Edward reached for my hand, I let him take it, trying not to worry so much. They were here to help me. They knew when it was time to pack up and leave a place, and they wouldn't stay here if it meant putting their family at risk.

"Would you like another bowl?" Edward's voice was soft spoken, and I focused on his words and his face as I glanced at him. He looked relaxed after all of this. Maybe I needed to follow his lead.

"No, this was plenty."

"Will you tell me what you are thinking?"

"Just about what Carlisle said, and Jasper earlier. I know you won't leave me alone again, and I also realize that you know when it's time to go away because of risks to being discovered. A part of me feels guilty for your imposed limitations on going places, even though everyone has agreed."

His thumb rubbed over the back of my hand as his eyes stayed focused on my face. "If it gets to be too much, the others can go away on their own, and always come back later."

That was very true. I really wasn't holding any of them here. "I just need to go with the flow and not worry so much huh?"

"This is all new to you. How we live our lives, what outside factors go into how we can live. For us it doesn't require much thought. The plan has been that we all lay low for a while before we start out in a new place being around the humans."

As I began to yawn, Edward let go of my hand and disappeared. From the kitchen I heard water running before it was silent again, and he came back to my side holding out his hand. We went upstairs to my room, and walked over to the crib. Carlie was resting peacefully on her stomach. In left hand, she was grasping her bunny, while her blanky was above her head. The rest of her small body was covered by the quilt I'd put on her before going downstairs. "I think our walk wore her out today."

"It seems she's getting used to being here now." Edward reached down, lightly running his fingers over her head before he leaned in placing a kiss where he had just touched her. After straightening up, he asked me if I wanted him to stay.

"Give me a few minutes to get ready for bed."

"Call for me and I'll be right here."

We looked at one another before it happened. Edward bent his head down. His lips brushed lightly over mine, before he pulled away but only by a little bit too look into my eyes. When I leaned toward him, his lips were on mine. His kisses on my lips weren't as gentle, though not rough as I wrapped my arms around his neck, raising up on my tip toes. When his cool tongue ran over my bottom lip, I opened my mouth and drew it in, scraping my teeth against him as he darted in and out of my mouth. His hands moved lightly down my sides, and I felt a chill run up my spine, though not from being cold. My breathing hitched as I pushed in closer not thinning about anything apart from what we were doing now. Finally I had to pull away to catch a breath. As I did, his lips kissed my chin and down my neck. I felt the coolness from the tip of his tongue. Before he finally stopped, not moving from his spot.

"Thank you."

He reached out placing his left hand against my cheek. "You don't need to thank me." Keeping his hand where it was, he leaned in and kissed my lips lightly before he moved away, walking slowly out of the room.

Once he had gone, I backed up and sat down on the bed. My finger traced over my bottom lip as I thought about his kisses. I wasn't regretting what we had just done. Far from that, I wanted more, and it was going to take real control not to get swept up in that desire. We still had a lot to work through, though maybe this was a part of all of that. We were adults. We had a child together. I knew I loved him without a doubt in my mind, and he wasn't going to run again. Maybe I could trust him.


	12. Pressing for More

**Chapter 12: Pressing for More**

**Bella**

Watching Charlie play with my baby made me realize how much he had missed having her around. After giving it some thought, I'd decided that coming over to the house with her, especially on the weekends, may ease his mind a little about how I was doing. Even so, there was a part of me that wanted to tell him it was none of his business how I chose to live my life, but he had given Carlie and me so much support that saying that to him felt wrong. While they played, I fiddled with my cell phone, flipping it open and closed while I idly thought of the kisses Edward and I had been sharing. We hadn't gone beyond kissing and touching one another. That was as far as it needed to go at this point.

"Momma." Carlie put her little hands on my knees, smiling up at me as Charlie remained sitting by the Duplo blocks they had been playing with.

"Hey you." When I reached out for her she backed up two steps, shaking her little head.

"Do you want me to play with you?"

Her smile was the answer she gave. As I got up she turned, heading back to her grandpa. Once I was sitting across from Charlie, my little girl got a pink block and brought it to me. "Oh thank you." She gave one to her grandpa before she sat down and took two of her own trying to fit them together.

"She sure knows what she wants," said Charlie as he took another block and fit it together with the one in his hand.

"Having more than one person to give her attention is what she likes most."

"I guess she has more with Edward, Carlisle and Esme."

"They love spending time with her," I agreed as I gave my baby my Duplo Block.

Charlie nodded. "So what has everyone been up to? I hardly see them around town."

Before leaving for Charlie's, Edward had given me ideas on what to say to possible questions my father had.

"Well, Carlisle is working from his home office, consulting with the surgeons at a hospital near Boston. Esme is fixing up the house. She thinks that she may try and sell it before too long. Edward is taking online courses from Dartmouth. Rosalie and Emmett got married seven months ago, and are staying in Hannover attending Dartmouth. Alice and Jasper are in Europe." As I filled him in, Charlie kept working on the tower Carlie was building. He didn't ask anything more which was a relief. It was times like these that I wished he didn't know about Jake and the Pack. It never would have been on his mind to ask about, or maybe notice that Carlisle hadn't changed much. There was only so much he could do to look older.

When Carlie got tired of playing with her blocks, I suggested we got out back and try out the new swing Charlie had gotten for her. Today was one of the rare days that the sun was out, so after getting her shoes put on her feet, and mine on my feet; we went out the back door.

Charlie had gotten a plastic baby swing and hung it from one of the trees. While he held it in place, I got her strapped in. When he let go, I gently pulled her back before letting her go, not having it swing too high, until I knew how she would react. At first, Carlie looked at me, not sure what to think. Charlie began to laugh and clap his hands reaching for her as she swung away from him. After that she was laughing and I pulled her feet gently to let her go a little higher.

Again, I had a chance to stand back watching Charlie play with her, wondering if he had much of a chance to do any of this with me. Most likely he hadn't had that opportunity, because my mom left him when I was only a few months old. I'd thought of that over the past few days, knowing that at some point in time the Cullens would have to leave.

Carlie's sudden screech brought my head out of the clouds. Charlie had stopped the swing, and she was struggling and fussing. "Does she need to get out?"

"I thought she might want to."

"She's fine."

Once the swing was going again, she was all smiles and laughs. It didn't take long for my daughter to start getting tired, and as the swing slowed down she began to fall asleep. Fifteen minutes later she was resting in her crib, worn out from all of the excitement of a new experience. In Charlie's kitchen, I made both of us a BLT, bringing that in with chips and a beer for him, and carrots and water for me.

"Thanks Bells, this looks great." The TV was turned on to a soccer game, and as we ate he was quiet, into his game. We were both quiet while we ate, and when both of us were finished, I took our plates into the kitchen and washed them. As I was putting things away, Charlie brought in his beer can and put it in the recycling pile.

"So, where is Sue today?" I'd been surprised that she hadn't stopped by.

"She's making rounds."

I nodded. Sue was a midwife to the local women in the tribe, and would have delivered Carlie had she not come so early.

"Bella, I've been thinking about a few things."

My hands began to sweat and I felt my heart skip a beat. Charlie thinking wasn't a good thing. "About?"

"Well, about legends."

"Anything you need to know would be better answered by Jake and the pack." I side stepped him as I went into the den where I began to pick up the mess of toys on the floor. This wasn't what I needed. Why couldn't he just let this whole thing go? Or maybe like Jake and the pack, him knowing wouldn't be such a bad idea. One of these days something would happen with me or Carlie that would need an explanation."

"I'm not sure I'd get the right answer from them." Charlie knelt in front of me and I let the Duplo Block in my hand drop. When I reached for it, his hand got to it first.

"What do you want dad?" I asked, feeling tired.

"I want to know that you are going to be safe, and taken care of."

Charlie was hedging. Hearing my baby fussing upstairs was my relief. I left him with her toys going to her, pulling her into my arms. I was glad to feel her little arms around my neck as she settled down. As I held her, I got the diaper bag packed back up and was back downstairs ready to leave.

"Bella, don't go."

"I left some things of hers at their house dad."

Before he could say anything else I was out the door heading for my old truck. Carlie was quiet as I strapped her into the seat, making sure she had her bunny before I went around to my side. I saw Charlie walk out the door and pulled out of the driveway feeling frustrated and angry. Maybe it was better to just leave now. Maybe he needed to know. As I pulled out onto the main road and looked in my rear-view mirror, his cruiser was following close behind. "Crap."

My hands free was in my ear in a second and I dialed Edward's number.

"Bella?"

"Charlie's following me. He's asking about legends. I have no idea what do."

"Try not to worry."

Once we hung up, I focused on driving, glancing out my mirror in hopes he wouldn't be there. He wasn't on my tail, but he never left from behind me. When I pulled up to the house, no one was waiting for me. For just a second I felt panicked, until rational thought returned. It would look really odd to have Edward waiting for me. It would be better if Charlie didn't know I'd called him, especially with the way my dad felt about making calls or texting while driving. It was right up there with driving a motor cycle.

After parking the car, I reached to my right getting Carlie out of her seat. She patted my cheeks as I opened the door and stood up outside.

"Bella, why do you keep running?" Charlie had reached my side and Carlie reached for him, but I didn't let her go.

Finally I faced him. "Why do you keep pushing me?"

My baby tensed in my arms and I took a deep breath remembering just how much she could sense my emotions and or the emotions around her. Before he could answer, Edward came outside along with Esme and Carlisle.

When Charlie saw them he seemed to relax a little.

As Esme greeted him, Edward was at my side taking Carlie from my arms when she reached for him. My eyes found his and in them I could see only calm. They obviously had some sort of plan, which was more than I could say for me. As Charlie followed them inside, I felt the tension leaving my body.

"What are we going to do?"

Edward shifted Carlie to his left side before reaching out to cup my cheek with his hand. "We have all talked, and since he is aware of one part of the legend, we feel it may help him in the long run to know the rest."

Suddenly I was panicking, but Edward's thumb tracing over my lips drew my attention back to him. "If he learned it from Jacob's pack, any one of them, how would he react?"

I'd been so stressed out that having one of Jake's pack members tell my father hadn't entered my mind. "Are they telling him now?"

"No, they are waiting on us, and if you don't want them too, say so, they will hear you."

My eyes found my daughter safe in Edward's arms. She was watching me, and was calm where she was. "What about the Volturi?" My mind was coming up with more protests, but at the same time, having him know the truth would make things easier, in the long run. When it was time to leave, I didn't have to come up with a lie to tell my father. When they day came and I was turned, he would know why he couldn't see me without me having to lie to him.

While I thought all of that over, Edward had withdrawn his hand, but remained by my side kissing Carlie's hand as she held it to his lips, or patted his cheeks.

"If he rejects this?"

Carlie being put in my arms gave me my answer. My dad would be freaked out at first, but once he learned the true reason why she had survived being born so early, he would come around. Once I was ready, Edward took my free hand and together we walked toward the house.

Inside, Charlie was sitting on the sofa closest to the piano. Even though it wasn't easy, I let go of Edward's hand and went over to him putting Carlie down on his lap while Esme walked over with one of her toys. When I sat next to him, he looked at me.

"Dad, there are things that I haven't been upfront about," I began as Carlie struggled to be let down. Once she was on her feet, she toddled over to her toys and began to play. It wasn't easy, but I made myself look into Charlie's eyes, needing to gauge his reaction.

He was watching Carlie, his hands now folded on his lap. He looked remarkably calm, but I wasn't going to hope that he would stay that way.

"This has to do with the Cold Ones?" His left hand balled up into a fist as he took in a breath.

"Yeah it does."

Charlie let out his breath as his fist unclenched and he straightened his hand back out. He was still watching my daughter who was now playing with Esme on the floor. Carlisle was standing close by watching us, ready to step in when I needed him too.

"You don't drink human blood?" Charlie's gaze went to Carlisle.

"Only animal blood."

My father took in a breath and let it out. "How?"

Staying where he was, Carlisle told his story, one that I vaguely remembered being told, before they left. When he got to the part of being attacked by a real vampire, my father's hand found mine. I held on to his with both of my own while Carlisle continued by telling how he didn't want to live, and about the different ways he had tried destroying himself.

Once again I was drawn into Carlisle's story, grateful to Edward and Esme for keeping Carlie entertained, grateful that my dad was listening and not freaking out the way I had imagined him to. At some point during the retelling of events, Carlie was brought to me. I let her nurse while Charlie asked about the rest of the family, finding out that all of them had been turned, and the reasons behind why Carlisle had made the decision. All along I kept hoping he would accept all of this, not sure what I would do if he freaked out. When my baby went to sleep, Edward came and took her from me. Charlie didn't seem to notice him at all as Carlisle kept talking.

When there was quiet, I looked at my dad watching as he shut his eyes. He was taking it all in, and I held my breath waiting for him to yell, and or grab me and try and take off. "How is it possible for Carlie to be here? You and your family are not living."

I had wondered how that happened myself, and listened to Carlisle's explanation. When he finished, Charlie had more questions. "Did you know this could happen that my daughter could get impregnated?"

Inwardly I felt myself flinch. It sounded so clinical, like I was a lab rat. As Carlisle answered his question confirming that he knew it could happen, Charlie stood up and began to pace. Here we go, I thought, feeling my stomach do flip flops. A moment later, Charlie was glaring at me. "What were you thinking Bella? This is not normal, none of it is. They aren't living…"

Before he could go on, I found my strength and stood up facing him down for the first time in my life. "How do you explain Carlie? She is every bit a part of her father just as she is of me. She wouldn't have survived being born that early without the part of him that is her. I had a lot of time to think things over while they were gone, and I'm not jumping back into this like you seem to think I am. We did go too fast the first time around, I pushed it. He left because he wanted me to have a **normal** human life and because he didn't know that Carlie could happen. Carlisle didn't know how far we had gone." Hot tears were making their way down my cheek, and I angrily swept them away. "I've been trying to find a way to tell you about this, but didn't because I knew this was what you would do. Well now you know the truth. I'm in love with a vampire. I had a child with a vampire who is the most amazing little girl. Carlie is likely going to outlive me unless I am turned, and yes I've been thinking about that too. We wanted you to know so that you wouldn't have to be left in the dark when one day I stopped calling you."

A cool hand on my shoulder was all it took for me to spin around and wrap my arms around Edward. The tears kept falling as I felt him leading me away. A moment later we stopped walking as I took in a deep shuttering breath. Edward rubbed his hand over my back as I clung to him trying to calm myself. Now who was being irrational? I'd intended on not losing my temper, but hearing my own father react the way he had, it was difficult to take. "I knew this would happen." I mumbled into his shirt.

"Not everyone takes the news as openly as you do," Edward whispered.

For some reason I chuckled. "Maybe my reaction should have been like Charlie's."

"At one time I hoped it would be."

"And now?"

"I'm glad you were so comfortable with me."

Once I had taken a few breaths, I looked up at him. "At the time it made sense to me. I'm not sure if I can explain why that was, just know that it was and does make sense to me. I feel like I fit in with you."

Instead of answering me, Edward drew me back into his arms. "He wants to talk to you."

"Only if you stay by my side."

"Always"

In the front room, Charlie was sitting on the couch alone. I glanced at Edward, who gave my hand a squeeze before I walked around in front of my dad. He looked from his lap to me and over to Edward. "Bells, I'm sorry. This is a lot to try and understand."

"I know. I'm so used to this, and having Carlie, I felt the need to defend her father, and his family, my family." Feeling some strength return, I let go of Edward's hand and sat down next to Charlie. "I've never fit in, not in Phoenix, not here. It wasn't until I met Edward that I felt a connection. It's not something I can explain, more just a feeling that we belong. That feeling has grown since having Carlie and since he's returned."

Charlie scratched the back of his head. "So, wolves and vampires?"

I smiled a little. "Yeah. I needed you to find out from us. Leah especially isn't a big fan of Edward and his family, nor is Jake, and it would have been harder for you hearing it from them based on how they feel about them."

"And to think I wanted you to fall in love with Jacob Black." Charlie chuckled a little before sighing, and glanced back down at his lap.

"Do you have anything else you want to know?" I asked

"I'm sure I'll have a lot more questions. Right now I'm ready to head home and grab a six pack and watch a game while I try to let it all soak in."

The piano began to play, and both of us glanced behind where we sat, seeing Edward on the bench. The music coming from his piano was soothing. When Charlie stood up and walked slowly over, I followed him. The music continued to play in a beautiful melody both complex and relaxing at the same time. When he finished, it was like Jasper had pulled all the tension from the room, only to my knowledge they had all taken off. Carlisle and Esme had returned both standing behind their son, as Charlie glanced at them all. "That's a great talent you have."

"Just a hobby," Edward said.

"Well, I think I'm going to leave you all alone now. Bells, will you walk with me?"

"Sure."

Outside, the sun was setting. Charlie led the way to his cruiser and stopped at the door, turning to face me. "I'm sorry I said those things."

"I'm sorry I didn't say something sooner."

"We have time to figure this all out right? I mean, I want to be there no matter what you decide. I don't want to lose you."

My throat tightened, and I had to clear it before I answered. "You won't lose me, dad. I want you to be a part of my life and Carlie's. Look, Sue knows, so does Billy, so if you need to talk to them you can."

"I had a feeling they did. I should be angry, but right now I'm just tired."

I could sympathies. "Will you call if you want to talk some more?"

"Yeah."

After a second we hugged. Even after his car couldn't be seen going down the driveway anymore, I remained where I was. Today had been a big day for him, and really for me too. This was all going to work out. Having him know meant he could see Carlie more often, well once he found out that she was drinking blood as part of her diet. Thinking of my daughter, I turned around and went back into the house.

My baby was awake, sitting at the piano on Edward's lap as he played for her. When she saw me, he stopped playing because our baby was doing her best to get out of his arms. "Here's my big girl."

"Momma, Dadda mo, he mo."

"I see that. He likes playing the piano for you."

"Dadda."

My baby bounced in my arms, and laughed when I lifted her above my head letting her fly. When I brought her back into my arms, she leaned backward, letting me know she wanted down. Once on her feet, she reached for my hand and led me over to the pile of toys which was always in the middle of the room. As we sat down to play, the room quickly filled with the rest of the family. Rosalie and Alice joined us, while Edward began to play something else on the piano.

Much later that evening, once Carlie had gone to sleep, Edward led me outside. With everyone inside, and my talk with Carlisle along with Jasper, there hadn't been much time for the two of us to discuss Charlie's visit. "How do you feel," Edward asked as we walked slowly around to the back of the house.

"Better now that he knows, and worried because unlike me, he really doesn't have anyone that will be on my side of things when and, well when I am turned." That was a topic we hadn't really talked about much of late, and as I said that, I glanced up at him. We kept walking towards the garage and beyond. It hadn't grown completely dark yet and I didn't feel any tension coming from Edward.

"I think Sue will be there for him, and his friend Billy. They know how much you mean to him."

That was true. I remember coming back home that first time meeting up with Billy and Jake, how Billy had said that Charlie had talked a lot about me coming to live with him. "They won't hurt him with disagreeing, and I know he doesn't want that for me, but I'm not willing to outlive our daughter, and I want to do this. The thing is, I'm just not sure when."

We stopped walking, and Edward turned to face me. "Whenever you decide, I support you."

Hearing him say that and mean it was a surprise. "What changed for you? I thought when I finally did have this discussion you would protest."

"When I was away from you, and my family, there was plenty of time to think about what had happened. My reason for leaving you, which was wrong, along with what happened that day in the meadow, which gave me a reason to keep going. You have been stronger than me in a great many ways. You've raised our daughter and done a better job than anyone could. I've underestimated you too many times, and I'm not going to do that anymore. I think Carlisle while he meant well, defended me when he stated that I couldn't grow emotionally due to my age when he turned me wasn't correct. I've used that as an excuse all of my existence. When it got to difficult I would run, like the day I saw you in Biology for the first time. I wanted your blood and I was angry that you would bring me to that near frenzied state. Instead of staying behind, and gaining control of things, I left. Again when we had your birthday, and your life was put in danger, I made the decision that we should all leave. That time in particular wasn't all my choice to make. Being here with you these past few weeks, watching you take care of Carlie, and healing from Victoria's capture, you've shown me just what it means to have courage and what it means to stay and fight for something you want. I want to be with you Bella. I'm not going to run. I know there will be new experiences that might test us, but I'm going to stay right beside you, if you will allow it."

"Yes I will allow it." My arms were around him as he drew me into his embrace. I'd needed to hear this from him so badly. His arms tightened around me and I held on to him like it was only Edward keeping me from floating away. "It's been really hard, being strong for Carlie. If I wouldn't have had her, I'm not sure I would have lasted. I would have fallen apart. I almost did fall apart." I lifted my head looking up at his face. "I don't want to continue to raise her by myself. You have been following my lead, and I'm thankful for that, but we are partners now. We will both raise her equally as parents do and should. If you guys need to leave Forks one day, I will go with you."

Instead of answering, His head bent down and his cool lips brushed over mine. His tongue licked over my bottom lip and as my knees began to wobble, Edward's hand was at the small of my back pulling me closer to him. His kisses became more demanding and his hold on me tightened, but he was still in control.

My hands clutched at his side as I opened my mouth sucking on his tongue as it darted in and out. Standing on my tiptoes, I thrust forward grinning when he growled as I rubbed against the bulge in his designer slacks.

His lips parted from mine, and the color of his eyes had darkened ever slightly. "We need to find a way to protect against another pregnancy." He wasn't out of breath, but I was, and a little dazed.

"I agree, I just wish we didn't have to stop, because I want you."

"Hearing you say that is worse than any blood-lust I may have had," he growled before his lips were back on mine." Edward's other hand on my back moved down cupping my bottom before he pulled me inward and up. My breath caught as he rubbed against me and my body responded. A tightness formed just below my belly button and spread downward. I gasped as his lips moved away from mine and he kissed down my neck up to my hear. "I love you." He breathed as I felt my insides clench.

"We need to talk to Carlisle."

Edward chuckled as he nibbled behind my ear. "Yes, soon."

**AN:** _Thank you all so much for continuing to read my story and for my first timers, welcome. I'm sorry for the long delay, but my depression has been a little worse over the past week and that makes it really hard to try and write. I do promise that I'm going to finish this story so no worries there. Just the updates might be a little further apart until things settle down again. _

_So things will start going towards the M rating. I've been trying not to rush things, but I think Bella and Edward are ready to move forward. I'm ready for that myself. _

_Thank you all for the Reviews and the adds. Keep them coming and I'll do my best to respond. _

_More soon_


	13. The Meadow

**Chapter 13: The Meadow**

**Edward**

Resting in bed with Bella's back pressed against my chest while she slept, was my favorite way to spend the loneliness brought on by night. On occasion she still talked in her sleep, though nothing coherent. When Bella first came to stay with me, often times she would wake up due to bad dreams caused by Victoria capturing her. Lately, those dreams had faded away, replaced by ones that didn't bother her. When she shifted, I moved my arms from around her, smiling when Bella turned over inching towards me until her head was resting pillowed on my chest. She breathed in deeply, content in her sleep just as I was very content to hold her in my arms. On the other side of the bed, Carlie rolled over, her arm flopping out over her head as she made sucking motions with her mouth. All I needed was right here within my reach.

Had it really been a week since Charlie's visit? That night after he left, I'd sensed lightness in Bella. We walked outside and had talked about what had happened. Both of us had noticed a change in our relationship, and I was finally able to tell her what had been on my mind for so long. My words had seemed to free her, letting her know that I could be trusted. We were becoming a family, and that for me was the end to my shamed existence.

Now I could have dreams, and could hope for a future with Bella by my side, not as someone I had to watch over and protect, but a woman who was in every way my equal. No, she wasn't vampire, but with all she had been through, she was every bit as strong as one of us, at least from an emotional standpoint. One day when she was ready, I would turn her without hesitation. As I thought about our conversations over the past week, I rubbed my hand gently over her back, tilting my head down to kiss the top of her head.

Carlie's breathing changed from the deep breaths of sleep, to quick breaths when she rolled over on her left side and then to her right.

Without waking Bella, I slipped out from beneath her and walked over to the other side of the bed, just as Carlie lifted her head. I knelt down so she could see me, rubbing my hand over her back. Her eyes blinked, and she yawned before she stuck out her arm, reaching out to pat my lips.

"Shh."

As I continued to rub her back, moving my hand in small circles, she yawned keeping her eyes on me. Being able to read her mind would help to know what had woken her. This was the first night she had gotten up so early, and I wasn't sure if I should wake Bella, or get her up and try rocking her to sleep.

When her head lifted again, and she reached for me, I got her blanket, draping it over my shoulder before settling her against my chest. Carlie rubbed her face on soft blanket as I moved over to the ottoman and sat down. She drew her arms between us resting her cheek against my chest as I started to rock her. After shutting my eyes I began to hum, making up a new song as she went back to sleep. It was the quiet times like now when I thought about what I had missed. Often times my thoughts would focus on what it would have been like to be by Bella's side from the moment she found out about our daughter, until she was born, though at the right time. Those thoughts hurt because my foolishness in leaving had caused me to miss so much of her life, and so much time with Bella, time we could never get back.

Shifting on the bed as Bella woke up brought me to her side. Her smile took away the sad thoughts of just a moment before. "I didn't even notice you leaving. I did notice the empty bed. When did she wake up?"

"Not long ago." Our daughter didn't utter a sound as I eased her from my chest, back down on the bed beside Bella. "I debated on waking you, or picking her up."

Before saying anything, Bella reached out for me, and when I had her hand she drew it to her lips and kissed the back. "You are her daddy, Edward. If she wakes up and needs you to hold her, and I'm asleep, you don't have to worry what I will think. If I would have been awake, I would have held her too."

Gently, I sat down on the edge of the bed. "One would think that after all of the life I'd lived, taking care of a little girl would be easy. Some things I still question."

"Like what?" Her hand kept a hold of mine.

"If I'm going to make mistakes, ones that will hurt her."

"You will make mistakes, we both will and we may hurt her feelings sometimes, but ultimately, she knows that she is loved. No one is perfect, no parent is. We will just have to learn when we do something wrong, and move on."

"You are amazing, and beautiful." Before she could say anything, my love yawned. "And tired, I'm sorry we woke you."

"Don't be. I like talking to you when it's quiet like it is now."

"I like this too."

"Rest with us."

Once I was lying on the other side of the bed, Bella moved back to resting her head against my chest, though this time I put a pillow under her.

"I don't really need that."

"Will you let me have it there to ease my mind?"

"I suppose." When she lifted her head, and moved up my chest, I wrapped both arms around her and brought my lips to hers. I kissed her until she had to pull away to breath, and even then my lips found other spots to kiss. Her neck was a favorite spot, not because of blood-lust, but because of her reaction when my lips sucked in her skin, or when I traced my tongue along the path of kisses from her neck to her ear. Her scent was heady, and I wanted to do more than kiss her lips and behind her ear.

We had finally managed to speak to Carlisle and he had prescribed birth control, though Bella couldn't take it until Carlie was off of her milk, something she was working on doing. When her head returned to resting against my chest, my hands rubbed over her back, much the way I had done with Carlie. Our baby slept without a care in the world, perhaps knowing that she was safe with the two of us never far from her side.

In the kitchen as Bella showered upstairs, I sat at the table with Carlie on my lap. While I held on to her, she ate the scrambled eggs and toast her Mimi had just put in front of her. This was the third morning of the new routine. Before she woke up, Bella left the room to shower, and once Bella was gone, I got Carlie up, changing her diaper before bringing her down for to eat. So far she didn't seem to miss nursing, and was down to Bella feeding her right before bed. She was also taking more blood in her sippy cup, and seemed to prefer that most of the time over cow's milk.

"Mmm" Carlie turned in my arms holding some toast in her hands for me to eat. When I opened my mouth, she put the bite in. With one quick chew I swallowed it.

"How can you stand that?" Emmett asked as he came over to the table.

"Carlie, share with Uncle Emm

"OH no." He began to back away, but not before my little girl held out her arm with some of the toast for him to try in her small hand.

"Ah ah."

Emmett gave me a nasty look as he shuffled back to the table, letting her put the toast in his mouth. His lips puckered and as he swallowed, he hurried away making gagging sounds.

"Edward," Esme admonished.

"He wanted to know how I could stand it," I defended while Carlie continued to eat.

My mother shook her head and continued to clean up from making breakfast for my ladies.

"What's wrong with Emmett," Rosalie asked as she came into the kitchen.

"Carlie shared her breakfast with him."

Before my daughter could offer, Rose turned and left the room. When I laughed, my baby tilted her head up smiling at me. "They are a bunch of silly ones. It's not that bad is it?"

"Mmm."

Bending my head forward I kissed her little nose. Carlie laughed before she got another bite of toast and stuffed it in her little mouth.

A moment later, Bella came in all fresh from her shower. The smell of strawberry shampoo and her sweet scent greeted my senses. "Good morning," she said to us both, leaning in to give our baby a kiss and then one to me.

"Good morning, love."

"No fuss?"

"Only a little when I got her cleaned up, but nothing after that."

"Good. Esme, this looks wonderful." Bella sat down across from us.

As she began to eat, Carlie arched her body. After putting her down she went to her momma just as Esme came with her sippy cup. While Bella ate, Carlie rested in her arm drinking from her cup, totally content.

"How is the weather looking?"

"Another sunny day for us," I answered as she took a bite of the omelet my mother had made for her.

Once Carlie finished with her cup, she wanted down and I was grateful to her Mimi who followed her into the other room.

"Edward, why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because I'm in love with you, and it's hard to take my eyes away from the one I love the most."

Her blush was my reward, and something I knew I'd miss when she was turned.

"NO" Carlie's protest took me away from the table and her mother. In the front room I was greeted by the site of my baby clutching one of her aunt's magazines. Rosalie was on her knees in front of her trying to make a trade with one of her toys, while at the same time; Emmett was offering to let Carlie ride on his back.

"Emmett." I shook my head realizing that Carlie was overwhelmed with both of them trying to get the magazine away from her. From the look on my sister's face, I could tell it was important that the pages stayed intact.

Carlie was standing with her back to me, and didn't notice my approach. When I scooped her into my arms and began to nibble her neck, I thought she would laugh. Instead she began to struggle and yell, but the magazine fell from her grasp. "Noo no." With her still struggling, cradled in my arms, I went to the sofa and sat down. Bella arrived sitting next to us, and Carlie reached for her, crying as Bella cuddled her to her chest.

For the moment, her attention was focused on our baby, so I went over to my sister. "How did she get the magazine?"

"It was where I keep all of them," Rosalie answered. Her tone was one of sadness, and one I understood. "We need to start putting things we don't want her to get where she can't reach. I should have remembered from those days I spent with my friend. I should have just let her have it."

"No, she needs to know that there are some things she can't have," I told her as Carlie's cries softened into whimpers. Emmett held out his hand and Rosalie took it, letting him help her to her feet. As she hugged him, I glanced at Bella, watching as she rocked our baby. Had I made a mistake? When I sat next to her, Carlie turned her face away from me, hiding it within the folds of Bella's sweater.

"We need to pick up the things we don't want her to get to."

Bella smiled at me. "Baby proofing. She's been so good about playing with her toys."

"I feel like there was a better way to handle this."

"She would have done the same thing to me, and I have taken things from her before, but you're still new to her, and this time she seemed pretty angry."

"I'll come get you."

"No, she needs to know that she can't have some things and you did just fine."

Even though Bella said that, having Carlie upset at me wasn't easy to take.

The piano being played behind us caught Carlie's attention instantly. When she saw me her little brows furrowed before she slid from Bella's lap.

"Rosalie can play?"

"Almost as well as me."

"Better than you," she called out as she let Carlie sit on her lap. With our daughter well-tended too, I wrapped my arms around my Bella and leaned into the sofa.

"She's really good," Bella said. When I huffed and pretended like I was going to pull away. she clung to me. "Hmm but I like you playing better, she whispered as soft as she could. Rosalie kept playing, ignoring us as she focused on Carlie and the music

Driving towards the path that would take us to our meadow was like going for the first time. While Bella had control of the car, I was comfortable riding passenger next to our little girl. Carlie had forgotten about our earlier conflict, and had her hands over her nose and over her left eye in an attempt to hide during our game of peek-a-boo.

"Where is my little girl?" The moment I asked, Carlie held her hands out laughing as I gasped. I couldn't help but laugh with her.

"Dadda."

I covered my eyes and face so she couldn't see anything but the backs of my hands.

"Carlie, where is your daddy?"

"Dadda?"

When I uncovered my face, her laughter filled the car. Our game continued until Bella pulled my car to the side of the road. While she got Carlie unstrapped from her seat, I got the picnic basket from the trunk setting it down so I could strap on the pack carrier. Once I had it secure, I knelt down, waiting as Bella got our little girl settled inside.

As we walked into the woods, I held the basket in one hand while holding Bella's hand in the other. Today there wasn't a rush to get to our meadow, and while we walked, Bella told me about the first few weeks after Carlie came home for good. "She was a quiet baby and I know a lot of that had to do with the fact that she was never left to sleep on her own. I read too much while she was in the hospital about all the things that could happen, like SIDS, and she slept better if I held her against my chest."

"She could hear your heart beat, and I'm sure your body heat kept her warm."

The sun was shining on our meadow when we got there. Bella spread out the heavy quilt I had packed and after I knelt down, she lifted our daughter out. Carlie looked around at all of the flowers, before she saw me. She laughed as my skin sparkled and ran into my arms. "Da da."

"What do you think?"

I held out my arm and she touched my skin rubbing her hand over it as it shimmered. It was Bella who distracted her, and Carlie ran around in the flowers with her mother while I sat watching them. The sun went behind the clouds as they came back to me, and while I held Carlie on my lap, Bella got out all of the food Esme had cooked.

Her hair was tousled due to running with our little girl, and the slight breeze blowing through the meadow. To me, Bella was a vision just as she had always been.

While Bella ate, I fed Carlie some of the fruit salad my mother had made, as she ate chunks of chicken on her own. After they had eaten all they could, and the food was packed away, Bella gave me the sippy cup as Carlie rested in my arms and began to drink from it.

"_I remember him as if it were yesterday, as he came plodding to the inn door, his sea-chest following behind him in a hand-barrow—a tall, strong, heavy, nut-brown man, his tarry pigtail following over the shoulders of his soiled blue coat, his hands ragged and scarred, with black, broken nails, and the sabre cut across one cheek, a dirty, livid white." _It had been a long time since I had recited **Treasure Island**, but that along with many other stories, and memories were easy to call up.

The gaze of my daughter's green eyes stayed focused on my face, and when I began to rock her, it wasn't long before her lids began to droop. "Now, if you meet any man as scruffy as he, you tell him that your daddy won't approve of him." Her eyes shut and she took in a deep breath as her mother took away the sippy cup. Lightly, I brushed a kiss across her forehead. "Your daddy won't approve of anyone Carlie, because no one will be good enough," I whispered, holding her a little closer.

Now more than ever I could sympathize with Bella's father, or any man who had a daughter. Once I had laid our baby on her stomach in front of me, I sat back as her mother settled in my lap.

"Treasure Island?"

"A favorite of mine. Carlisle saved my copy and gave it to me after I came home from my rebellious time away."

"What were you feeling when you were talking to her just now?"

My arms wrapped a little tighter around Bella as she leaned back against my chest. "Protective, like I've never felt before, not even with you. I know she will meet someone someday, but the thought of any man wanting to do the things I want to do with you, drives the sanity out of me."

Bella tilted her head back much the way Carlie had been doing. "That's a long way away, and what things do you want to do to me?"

Instead of answering her with words, my lips took hers, but only in a gentle kiss before I lifted my head.

"Is that all?"

"Much more, but I don't think Carlie would like all the noise I know both of us would make."

Bella chuckled. "That is true, and I don't want to scar her for life trying anything with her sleeping so close."

We sat as we were, watching our baby while she slept. A little later, Bella moved off my lap to get some of the dessert Esme had packed. I slipped my hand into the pocket of my jeans without her knowing.

She ate a few bites of the chocolate cake, licking her lips as she did. Easing on my knees, I pulled my and out of my pocket and crawled over to Bella. "Lean back."

She put the plate aside and did as I asked. "Now, close your eyes."

Again Bella complied as I moved over her with one hand on either side of her body. I bent my head down and licked some of the chocolate frosting from her lips before melding them to hers. I sucked her bottom lip in, nipping it with my teeth as she gasped. Her arms shot up, locking around my neck as her mouth opened and I delved my tongue inside, tasting her sweetness more than that of the cake.

When she needed air, I lifted my head. Her eyes were still closed as I sat back. "Bella, look at me."

Her eyes found mine before lowering to my outstretched hand. When she didn't move and began to chew on her bottom lip, I could tell she was holding back tears. "You are my soul, the part of me that has been lost for so long. With you, my life can start again. I want to be by your side for the rest of my existence. Bella, will you marry me?"

She sat up and got on her knees nodding as tears slipped down her cheeks. Her hand shook as she held it out while I slipped my mother's engagement ring on her finger. It was a perfect fit, just as Bella was a perfect fit for me. In my arms she cried, and I knew that I had overwhelmed her, but that she was strong enough for me and anything that came with being my wife.

**AN**: _I had all day to finish this up and now it's ready for you to read. So, I know I've done a story with them having two children a story that I want to complete, but may not. That story I got rushed on, and there are things I would liked to have done differently, soo, that being said I'm thinking of adding a sibling for Carlie, Yay or No? _

_Thank you as always for reading this story. Thank you to my silent readers and thank you for the ones of you who continue to review. They make my day. Seeing how many of you read and add me to lists also make my day. _

_More soon_


	14. Gifted

**Chapter 14: Gifted**

**Bella**

Having time alone with Carlie, was something I'd needed. When Edward asked me to marry him, there hadn't been any hesitation in giving him my answer. All of my life my mother had drilled it into my head not to marry young, not to have children until there had been a chance for me to live a little, go to college, date, do all the things she didn't do when she and Charlie got married and had me. Maybe there wasn't any need to think over my answer, because we did have a daughter. No, it was more than that. Being able to see the real side of Edward, the side of him he couldn't show out in public because at high school he was supposed to act like he was seventeen, allowed me to see just how amazing he was. We talked all the time now. There wasn't any fear that if I said something that would be stunning or upsetting, he would run away. This openness was new to us both.

In my arms, Carlie slept peacefully. Nothing for her had changed other than there was a lot of excitement going on with the news that her daddy and I were getting married. What was it going to be like to be his wife? Maybe just the same as it was now, but I didn't know. A soft knock at the door got my attention, and I whispered that it was alright for the person to come in.

Alice was quiet as she entered, not making a sound while she walked to the bed. "Do you mind if I sit down?"

"Not at all."

The mattress didn't shift, though it was one of those foam memory models, which was nice since I shared my bed with Carlie. That would be changing once Edward and I were married, or at least I thought it should.

"I'm so excited for you and my brother."

I smiled. "I am too. Did you see this coming?"

"No. I don't know how he hid it from me. Though his future has been muddled for a while now. When it suddenly became clear, I had to go to my room so no one else would figure out that I'd seen something."

"Have you heard from them?" Jasper, Edward, Carlisle and Emmett had gone hunting early this morning and would be back soon.

"No, they are having male bonding time so I'm not surprised."

Alice's comment had me curious. "What does that entail?"

"Jasper and Emmett giving him advise on how to handle a married woman, and Carlisle enjoying watching them give Edward a lot to think about. They both feel protective of you."

Emmett and Jasper?"

Alice smiled, nodding. "They were really angry about how he handled everything."

Her words took me back to the night Rosalie and Emmett arrived at the house. Jasper and Edward had left the front room and gone outside. When I got out there, Emmett was fighting Edward. "But they forgave him."

"Oh yes, however, if he were to upset you again, you might have to get used to him without one of his limbs."

I wasn't sure whether she was kidding or not, but knowing that my soon to be brothers-in-law would stand up to Edward if it was needed, was sort of comforting.

"She is so serene when she sleeps."

"I know. I love watching her when she's like this."

Alice sat quietly by my side for a little longer. "I was wondering if you had any ideas for your wedding." It had been evident since that night how much she wanted to say something. I had a feeling Edward had stepped in and asked her not to overwhelm me, or like with Carlie when Alice first arrived, she was willing to take my lead.

"Honestly, I haven't really thought about the actual ceremony. I know it will be small on my side of things. Charlie, Mom, and Phil. Any more than that, would be too much of a risk to you and your family."

When she put her hand on my shoulder, I glanced at her. "Our family," she corrected.

That was going to take some time to adjust too. "Our family."

For the next few minutes, after I put Carlie down on the bed, leading Alice to sit on the ottoman, we talked about some ideas she had. "We can have it here. If you want to invite more of your friends, I have ideas on how to help with our aging."

Her words surprised me. "How?'

"Wardrobe and lots of styling gel for hair, and the use of makeup. Do you know what time period Edward was from?"

"Wasn't it the early nineteen hundreds?" Alice confirmed with a nod, and told me her idea on planning a wedding around him. She told me about the formal dress of the time, and how my dress could be planned accordingly. Once Alice had gone, there was a lot more on my mind, but all of the thoughts were pleasant. After dressing for bed, and lowering the darkening shades, I slipped under the covers on my side of the bed, watching Carlie until I was too tired to hold my lids open.

Waking up to find Edward in bed beside me, while Carlie slept against his chest, was a nice way to end my night's sleep. Her polar fleece blanket was draped over his chest, and she looked very comfortable where she was. "When did you guys get back?"

"Much later than we planned. Nothing was wrong. We just let time get away from us."

"We missed you, but I had some alone time to just sit up here with her and think. She didn't nurse last night." Last night I got her ready for bed like I normally did, and read to her. The thing I did different was not offer to let Carlie nurse, and she didn't mind, just resting cradled in my arms.

"How do you feel?"

"Sad in a way, because she doesn't need me for that anymore. But also ready because I want nights to be for us. I've got to try and teach her to sleep in her own bed."

"We can do that together."

Having Edward help me raise Carlie was something I was looking forward too. "I'd like that. Alice and I talked last night."

"I was worried she would overwhelm you."

"No, it was actually kind of nice. I don't want to wait very long for us to be married"

He smiled at me. "I don't want to wait long either."

Something in the tone of his voice made my skin crawl in a very pleasant way. To distract me from that, I kept talking. "If Carlie can go without nursing for a week, then maybe I can start on birth control." As the words came out of my mouth, I frowned.

"What is it?" Edward reached out taking my hand as I sat up curling my legs in front of me.

"It just sounds selfish all of a sudden. It sounded just now like the only reason I want her weaned is so I can start birth control so we can be together."

His hand gave mine a gentle squeeze. "Let me ask you something. Last night she didn't want to nurse. If she had fussed, would you have let her?" When I nodded, he continued. "And if in this next week she has set backs with weaning, will you force her to do something she's not ready for?"

"No way, she comes first." His questions had let me see the answer. The only way I'd start birth control was when she was ready to stop nursing on her own, and not be forced out of it.

After that, I snuggled up next to Edward, resting my head on his chest close to Carlie's. "I've never had someone help me reason things out like you just did. Everything she went through I had to think out on my own, or chose too because I felt like it was too much to ask Charlie to help out. He would take her downstairs some nights when she was fussy and rock her so I could sleep, but if I was worried like I was just now, I had to just hope I did the right thing. I'm glad I have you now."

"You will have me for as long as you want."

"Eternity."

"Yes."

Watching Carlie test out the keys on the piano while Edward held her on his lap, was a sweet site to see. My baby was fascinated with hearing him and her aunt play. The first time she pushed a key down and brought out a tune, she had gotten upset. Jasper said he felt she was overwhelmed, and guessed that she didn't know that she could cause the piano to make noise herself. Now Carlie was more confident as she pressed down different keys, though she had to use two fingers to get them to go down.

The door opened and Carlisle came in. As he shut it back into place, Edward looked at him. Carlie kept playing with the keys, not realizing as I did that her daddy was reading her Poppy's thoughts. Keeping his eyes on Carlisle, he called out for Rosalie. She sat down on the bench next to him. The second he put Carlie on her lap, I knew something was up. The features on Edward's face were normal as he looked at me. He didn't look worried or upset when he came to my side. "Carlisle needs to talk to us."

All I could do was nod, feeling a sense of dread creeping into my bones. He took my hand and guided me behind Carlisle as he walked down the hall towards the other end of the house. In Carlisle's office, I sat down on the sofa next to Edward while Carlisle shut the door.

"Bella, I ran some tests using Edward's venom, because as you know, I wanted to be sure that we used the right form of contraception to be sure you wouldn't get pregnant."

It dawned on me why he had brought us back here. "Nothing is going to protect except us not making love. Or if I do something surgically."

"Yes." Carlisle sat down across from us as I took in a breath before letting it out slowly, shutting my eyes. The answer should have been easy. I should be able to tell him to go on and do a Tubal Ligation or a Hysterectomy. Having Carlie was a miracle. The delays in development would make having another baby very unfair to her. She still wasn't talking like a toddler of nineteen months should be. She had difficulty holding her spoon or fork in her hand to feed herself. She wasn't meeting milestones, and that was something I had let slide a little until now. My eyes opened and I looked at Edward. "I'm not sure what to do."

When he drew me into his arms, I held on to him with both of mine. "A part of me doesn't want to do something so permanent. Sometimes I think about my childhood. It was lonely. I thought of not turning until maybe we talked about seeing if we wanted to have another baby." There, I'd said it.

"Missing out on being with you during that time is one of my greatest regrets. The selfish part of me wants to experience that with you."

That surprised me, not that he wanted to experience a pregnancy with me, but that he felt it was selfish, but really were my thoughts any different. "We are both feeling selfish. I'm worried about Carlie not talking, and not being able to feed herself very easily, and logically having surgery makes sense. There is a lot more than that. It would be risky for us to have another baby because of the Volturi, but admitting it, I feel like I'm getting ready to lose something."

His arms held me closer. "This is not something we have to decide on right this second, Bella."

"I know." Shifting back a little so I could see him, I sighed. "Would it be so bad if we just let nature take its course? If we get pregnant again, then we do?" I looked at Carlisle for the first time as he looked up from a book he had opened while we talked.

"There is a very good chance that you will become pregnant again. The research I did some time ago, shows that there is only a ten percent chance that you won't conceive."

No wonder Carlisle had been upset with Edward that first day in the hospital. Before I had a chance to think anything else, Edward stood up, pulling me to my feet before leading me very quickly back towards the family room. When we got there everyone was standing around the piano. Carlie was still sitting on Rosalie's lap, though when she saw me, she began to cry and reach for me.

"Hey, shh shh." Her little arms held tight to me while everyone left the room. Her cries became more frantic so I carried her over to the sofa and sat down rocking her, wondering what had just happened. "I'm here baby, its okay now." I repeated those words over and over until her cries turned into whimpers as she hid her face against my chest.

Edward joined as at that point.

"What happened?"

His eyes looked at our baby. "Everyone in the room received a fuzzy image of me sitting at the piano holding Carlie while she played with the keys."

For a second I didn't understand what he was saying. When it dawned on me my own eyes went from looking at the man I loved down to our baby. "She showed them?"

"Yes." He reached out and put his hand on her back. "Jasper said she scared herself so much she just stayed there until she saw you."

No wonder she cried so hard. "Carlie, it's alright baby. You're safe and loved my angel, and you didn't do anything wrong."

She took in a deep breath, her small hands still clutching at my shirt while I rocked her. "When it rains it pours. I never understood that until just now." Once again I was at a loss on what to do, and drew comfort in knowing that Edward was right beside me in this.

Our angel finally lifted her face away from my chest, looking up at me. "That was scary huh?" She took in a shuddering breath before glancing over at her daddy. When she reached for him, Edward lifted her away from me and settled Carlie against his chest. Carlie rested her cheek there as he rubbed her back, looking at me as I leaned against the sofa.

"Do you think what she did was random?"

"Very random, but it leaves me with the question of wondering if this is a way we can teach her to tell us what she wants."

That idea didn't sit too well with me. "How will she learn to use words, and if she gets comfortable with that form of communication, what if she uses it on someone who doesn't know?"

"Point taken. I guess we will just have to play this by ear," he answered, still rubbing her back as her eyes drifted shut.

Suddenly I felt very tired and about ten years older. "It's funny how this morning everything started out so peaceful, and now my stomach is in knots because we don't have any clear answers. The only thing I know is that I want to marry you, and a part of me doesn't want to make it a big production."

"We don't have to. If you want, we can get Carlisle to marry us."

Another surprise and not something that was unpleasant to find out. "Because of his past?" When Edward nodded, I took a deep breath and let it out before pressing my head against his left side. "No, I think a celebration would be nice for all of us. I want your, our family to be a part of this. My mom would never talk to me again if I didn't include her. That reminds me, I need to try and find the time to talk to both of my parents and Phil, to let them know, but right now sitting here with you and Carlie is a much better idea."

Saturday, two days after our big day, Carlie and I were getting ready to go see her Grandpa Charlie. Since that day, she hadn't projected anything else, and had blissfully forgotten what had happened, or seemed to. Having Jasper around was wonderful, because he could read her emotions. As I packed her diaper bag, Edward was leaning back against the headboard while our daughter sat on his chest trying to pull his hands away from his face. Carlie laughed as she got one hand moved away, and I found myself chuckling with her.

Once her bag was packed, I walked over to them as she got the other hand away laughing harder as she tilted her head back. Edward joined her as I did. "Oh, I love hearing that," I said once we stopped laughing.

"As do I. Will you get a diaper for me."

"Yep."

"No no." Her little head shook back and forth as he laid her down on the bed in front of him. Along with the diaper and the wipes, I brought her bunny, but she pushed him away and did her best to roll away from her daddy.

"Hey booger bear, do you want to see your Gramps? He has really missed you and you can swing again,"

Thankfully I had her attention and kept talking as Edward got her changed. Something blinked into my vision, and as I blinked it was gone again. Edward was putting her sweater on her, and didn't notice anything. "She did it." My knees wobbled and I sat down on the bed. He hugged her close looking at me now.

"There was a blink of something when I mentioned her swing, a flash of red and blue. That is the color of the swing. When I reached for our baby he let me take her. "Carlie, show mommy the swing."

My baby smiled at me, but I didn't get anything from her. "Gramps has your swing." When it happened, the vision was blurry, but it was the swing. A heartbeat later, it was her face. Carlie's brow furrowed and I quickly hugged her to me. "It's okay baby, you can show us like that."

Edward's hand was on my shoulder as I took a breath in. "I think your right. We need to not make a huge deal out of this. She's always been sensitive to my moods especially, but maybe she feels more than just me.

"Go, momma go."

Carlie lifted her cheek from my chest before she struggled to be let down. Charlie was expecting us at noon, and after getting her diaper bag and taking Edward's hand, I let him guide me to the gate blocking the stairs from Carlie's access.

The first thing Carlie went for when we got to Charlie's was her rocking horse. While my dad helped her onto his back, I went in the kitchen and put the small cooler with her two sippy cups into the fridge. There were a lot of things my dad needed to know, but where to begin was the question.

In the family room, he was sitting by the horse while Carlie made it rock on her own. "Look at my big girl," Charlie said proudly.

"She's getting stronger everyday."

"Do you think she will need to drink blood?"

"She is."

He nodded his gaze remaining on my baby.

"Dad, she has a new talent."

This time he glanced my way. "You don't sound very sure of that."

"It's not something most people can do. At times she can show you what she wants."

The look of confusion on his face was almost comical, but this wasn't the time to laugh. "Edward and Jasper call it projecting. It's like a picture, blurry because she's just figuring it out, but, if she wants to go to her swing, she can put a picture into your mind."

Now he looked like he didn't believe me. "That sounds like something out of one of those books your mother would read."

Carlie slid off her horse on her own and walked over to her toys, picking up one of her clear plastic balls, and putting it in the little chute, watching it roll down to the bottom.

"Says the man who just found out that his daughter is in love with a vampire, and his granddaughter is part of her father." I spoke the words without any heat behind them hoping to make a point. When Charlie shut his eyes and took in a breath, I knew he realized that this wasn't something I was making up.

"How are you doing with this?"

It was my turn to shut my eyes and sigh. "It's hard, because she's confused, and because unless we can teach her to control this, it may mean never letting her go out in public, at least until she understands that not everyone can know."

"That's not fair to her," Charlie defended.

"I know, but it's not something she can shut off."

"Tell her it's not something she can use." His tone was very matter of fact, like it was just that simple.

"Right now, she has a hard time talking, and this is her way of communication. Not letting her do this, would be like taking duct tape and putting it over her mouth. Dad, she's not all human, and as she grows up, there may be other things she can do."

Before he could respond, Carlie walked over and plopped down on his lap chewing on the foot of one of her stuffed animals.

"I don't like this."

"Do you love her?"

His brows lifted, "Of course I do."

"Then you need to learn that** this**, is a part of her, and that she can also sense emotions. If you react negatively around her, it's going to do a lot of damage, and I'm not going to let that happen."

"Momma."

Carlie got up and toddled over to me snuggling against my chest once she was in my arms. "See, she needs love and support."

Even though it was a little chilly outside, Carlie was having a good time in her swing. Charlie was in charge of keeping it going and I was having a nice time watching from the sidelines. He had gotten a lot of new information today, including my engagement to Carlie's father. Again he had surprised me telling me he had expected my news, and was glad Edward was stepping up to the plate. Leave it to Charlie to knock the romance out of what I was telling him.

A car pulling up in the driveway caught my attention and a few seconds later, Sue joined us, smiling as she walked over to me. "He's like a big kid."

"I know, it's fun to watch him."

Suddenly Charlie stumbled and for a second I thought he was just playing with Carlie. When he sat down on the cold ground, and my baby began to cry, I knew what had happened. While I got Carlie, Sue was at his side taking his pulse. Charlie waved her hand away, and I wanted to ask him what he had seen, but Carlie's cries were frantic now.

In my old room, my baby was cradled in my arms nursing, the only thing that had worked to calm her down. I was totally overwhelmed, and worried about Charlie, and now my mom. There was no way she could come to the wedding, and that thought alone had my stomach churning. Maybe he had a point, and telling her not to show us things was the key, but Carlie wouldn't understand why. My daughter's eyes were shut, and her breathing was back to normal. The way things were going now, Jasper was going to have to start having sessions with her as soon as she started to talk.

There was a knock at the door before it opened and Edward walked inside. Seeing him brought an instant ease to the churning in my stomach. He knelt down in front of us and rubbed his hand over our daughters back before placing it over mine. "Charlie called and said I was needed."

"She projected."

"He's still shaken up."

"What did she show him?"

"Sue."

"He was facing away from us." Now I knew why he was shaken up. Carlie had seen her, and was letting him know she was there, and had scared him half out of his mind. "She must have felt his fear."

"I believe that too. When she showed them me at the piano, they weren't afraid, just very surprised. She hasn't known fear."

"I thought I prepared him. He didn't want to believe me. We need to go home."

Carlie had fallen asleep and didn't stir when Edward took her into his arms. After getting her diaper bag, We went downstairs.

Dad and Sue were sitting on the sofa, though when he saw us he stood up and walked over.

"Hey, don't go. I'm so sorry, I just didn't realize what that was going to be like."

I hugged him. "I know dad, but we need to get her home." When I let go of him he nodded. Edward held the baby out so he could kiss her. Once he had, we headed out to the car.

Being back at the Cullens was home for me. Today more than ever, I had come to realize that.

"You have a lot going through your mind don't you?" Jasper asked

"Too much. All want to do is be able to create a place that isn't going to be upsetting for my baby, and I want to marry your brother."

Jasper chuckled. "He's very much ready for that. You are worried about something."

He never missed anything. "My mom can't see her for a while. Charlie knowing is one thing, my mom, no."

"There is a lot you seem to be giving up."

"And a whole lot more that I'm gaining. It's worth it to me to have Edward with me. I know that I don't have to try and figure out what to do for Carlie on my own, and that is worth giving up some things. What is hard, is the things she's going to miss out on, like going to Florida to see her Gran, or getting the chance to see the ocean again."

"She will have that opportunity," Jasper assured.

"It's all overwhelming."

For the next hour we talked about how to make life not as overwhelming, which came down to not making any plans for the wedding at this point and focusing on Edward and Carlie. It wasn't ideal, but we had all the time in the world to get married, and we would do that, just not in the foreseeable future.

"Carlie, where is Momma's nose?"

My little girl smiled at me before she reached up and touched my nose. "And where is Carlie's nose? She put her hand on her nose. It was just the two of us in the huge house. Edward and Emmett had gone hunting for mountain lions and bears. Jasper and Alice were spending the week in Seattle. Rosalie had gone with Esme to Portland to do some shopping for the house, and Carlisle had flown to Boston for a week to work attend a medical conferencel.

A fuzzy image of Edward blocked my vision of my little girl for a second before her face came back into site. She was watching me intently, waiting for an answer. "Your daddy is out in the woods with your uncle Emm. They should be home soon."

"Dadda."

"It's lonely without him isn't it."

A sudden sadness washed over me right as Carlie began to fuss. "Shh, you're safe angel, and daddy is coming home soon." It was her sadness I had just felt, though as I rocked her that feeling went away. It was time for her nap, and after getting her sippy cup from the fridge, and warming it under hot tap water, we went up to our room.

Carlie didn't cry or fuss as I got her pants off of her and held still while her diaper was changed. Once we were snuggled on the bed, she held her sippy cup while resting in my arms. It was a constant effort to remain calm around her, and once again Jasper's ability to read emotions was a huge help. He told us that she was picking up a whole lot more from all of us. With it being just the two of us, she had been pretty happy today. Maybe Edward and I needed to find a place of our own.

Once she was asleep, I laid her down in her crib making sure her blanket and her bunny were in her arms before grabbing the baby monitor and heading downstairs.

In the front room, the whole family had gathered there, and Edward had a bigger smile on his face than any of them. "I thought you three were out of town."

Alice bounced on her toes. "We were for a little bit."

"Uh huh, so what's going on?"

At that moment Edward came over and put his arms around me. I wanted to protest, tell him to let me in on this secret, but having him hold me was what I needed. "Will you take a walk with me?"

"If it will lead me to an explanation."

When he nodded, I took his hand tossing the useless baby monitor to Emmett before he led me outside. Normally, I would have told him about feeling our daughter's sadness. At the moment being outside in the cool autumn air felt good. Taking in a deep breath of air, I felt the worry leave me for just a little bit. We walked behind the house and down the path to the river. Seeing a bridge crossing from this side to the other stopped me in my tracks. I looked to my left and up at Edward who was smiling again.

"I'm not good with surprises."

"Will you try for me?"

Staying in my place, I crossed my arms over my chest. "Maybe, if you kiss me."

A moment later he was in front of me. His kiss was demanding, robbing me of everything except for the feel of his lips crushing against mine. His tongue pushed them apart and when he dipped it slowly into my mouth I sucked it deeper inside.

His growl was my reward before he pulled me hard against his body. Edward's tongue pulled out of my mouth with my teeth scraping against it. My breathing was labored, but I didn't care. Once he was sure I wasn't going to fall over, he let me go taking my hand. While we walked, my thoughts took me back to that time in the meadow. He had let me lead, and had been gentle when we made love. This time I was hoping he would be willing to take more control, and had a feeling he would. When we came to a stop, I glanced at him again.

"Close your eyes."

Without hesitation I did what he asked feeling my breath leave me as he scooped me into his arms before cradling me to his chest. "Do I get to open them yet?"

"Not just yet." Edward was walking again but at a quicker pace. With my eyes shut, I used my hearing to try and figure out where we were going. That part was useless, because his footfall didn't make a sound. We came to a sudden stop and I heard something click. We moved forward, before there was another sound, a door shutting. His hand went over my eyes as I opened them.

"Not yet."

"Then I want another kiss."

"Keep them closed."

"Fine." His hand moved away and this time his lips were gentle against mine. His teeth nibbled my top lip and then the bottom before he was kissing more deeply. Without thought I wrapped my arms around his neck molding my lips to his, finding a rhythm to his kisses that I did my best to match. Needing air was what stopped our kisses, and for him, I kept my eyes closed. My body shifted and I found myself standing again.

"Now, open your eyes." His arms were around me, and what I saw was right out of some story book. We were in a small cabin. The floor beneath my feet was polished wood. Further inside was a beautiful rug that spread across the center of the room. The furniture didn't match, but that just added charm to the place. Against the wall to my right were empty bookshelves just waiting to be filled. The bottom shelf was spread out from the next shelf up and there was a polished chest. "Toys?"

"Yes."

All I could do was turn and wrap my arms around him. "So this is what you were all up to?"

"My job was to keep you busy, but yes."

"Surprises are wonderful."

He chuckled before showing me around the rest of the cabin. It had a story and as we looked and explored, he told me that it had been falling apart, and had been here before he was even born. What impressed me the most was that there was running water.

"How did you manage that?"

"Vampire speed and it comes from a well we dug at the side of the house, a well that is being fed by the river."

"Is it safe to drink?"

He led me outside showing me the well and at the side of the house a box, which he explained contained the best filtration system money could buy."

My favorite room ended up being our daughters. The walls were painted ocean blue, with stenciled butterflies and faeries, Some of them were flying around, and others were sitting on toadstools, or in flowers.

"Who did all of this?"

"Esme."

"It's so beautiful." Against the far wall was a crib, and as I inspected it, I realized that it was one of those that could be turned into a bed."

There was a rocking chair to the left of the crib, Bentwood, with a cushion in the seat. The wall to the right was lined with shelves within Carlie's reach. There were already some toys there that were new, but not a whole lot. Against the left wall was a rocking chair that was her size along with a doll bed and another toy stove.

In the center of the room was a small table and chairs that matched the wood of her crib, all of it white, and beautiful. The table sat on a rug that was shaped like a flower in full bloom. The colors in the rug were pinks and greens of various shades.

"She is going to love this."

"And our baby is on her way."

He left me alone, and after glancing around one last time, I went down the small hallway back into our front room just as Edward came in with our angel. Carlie was quiet in his arms, her hair rumpled from her nap. "Welcome home." When I had her in my arms, she snuggled against me, still tired from her nap. Without having to think about it, I took her into her room and rocked her until she was ready to explore all of the new things.

Edward sat down on the floor with a new book and even though there were a lot of new things for her, she went over to him and sat in his lap patting the book as he began to read to her.

Our baby was gifted, and a gift. There was a lot to figure out and time to think things through without having to rush. This house was another gift and I hoped that being here with just her father and I, Carlie would learn that her gift wasn't something to be afraid of. The ache in my chest began to ease, and while Edward read to our little girl, I was content to listen to his voice and enjoy our new solitude.

_**AN: Thank you for reading this chapter and my story. Again my thanks to all of you who are reviewing and adding me to your lists. To those of you who are my silent readers, thank you for contusing to follow along. **_

_**A lot going on in this chapter. Carlie has a powerful gift, leaving her parents with a lot to figure out. I wanted Bella and Edward to have a place of their own and the cabin idea went from there. Also she needs a way to get over the river on her own, and it didn't seem like a stretch that they could put a bridge over it for her. **_

_**They will get married, not sure when at this point, but it is in the works. **_

_**More soon.**_


	15. Adjusting

**Chapter 15: Adjusting**

**Edward**

When Esme approached me, not long after Bella and Carlie came to live with us, about restoring the old cabin in the woods, there was no doubt in my mind on letting that happen. At first she began working on sketches and designs on her own. Once my siblings discovered what she was doing, they began giving Esme input. The work on the cabin didn't really start in earnest, until after Carlie began to show her gift. When I approached my family, asking them if we could focus on getting the cabin complete, everyone was on-board. Now we had a place to call our own. For Carlie it was a calming place. We were already working on getting her into a routine, something that had been lacking at the other house, with so many other people wanting to spend time with her.

Beside me, Bella shifted, rolling towards me. An instant later her cheek was pressed against my chest with her right arm draped over her head while she slept. I knew she wasn't chilled because of the previsions my mother had made for us. Not only did we have an electric blanket, but the mattress had heating options. My body wasn't the softest place to use as a pillow, but Bella had never complained, not now and not before.

Spending my second night in bed with the woman I loved in my arms, was calming. There was nothing calling me away from her, or our daughter who had done much better when we put her in her crib this evening. Our first day here, had been all about letting Carlie explore our new home, both inside and out. Our baby loved the garden which mine and Bella's room looked out on through French Doors. The paths in the garden were filled with white sand. There was a small fish pond in the western corner where the waters lapped out onto the sand. Bella had been thrilled, because it reminded her of being with her mother. For me, the sand and the lay out of the garden, along with the color of our room and that of our daughters meant something more.

Carlie shifting around in her crib, along with a change in her breathing brought my focus on her. Looking at the clock on my bedside table, it showed she had been asleep for three and a half hours, an hour more than she had slept last night before waking up, wanting Bella. Another change we had decided on was that Carlie would not sleep in our room. Bella had rocked her to sleep after I read her a story both nights, and when Carlie had woken up last night wanting someone to hold her, she had let me go in to our daughter and settle her down without her.

"Bun bun." There was more shifting going on, and I listened to her playing with Bunny, waiting to see if she was going to be able to go to sleep on her own, or if I or Bella would be needed. Our daughter said "no" to Bunny a few times before I heard her friend being dropped out of the crib. There was another sound of something being dropped out, her blanket. Carefully I rolled to my left, sliding my hand under Bella's cheek.

"Is she awake?" The ability Bella had to go from sound sleep to fully awake still astonished me. Esme said it came with being a mother, and having a sense when your little one needed you.

"Yes, she's been talking to Bunny, telling him 'no' several times. She has also decided to toss both Bunny and her blanket out of the crib."

Bella snuggled against me. "If she fusses I'll go in."

"Did you think about what Esme suggested?"

My love rubbed her cheek against my bare chest, sighing. "It's going to be hard not to pick her up, she's used to that. She also won't go back to sleep easily without her blanket or Bunny." Even though she pointed that out, Bella didn't move from against my chest, and our daughter continued to tell Bunny 'no' for a little longer before she began to fuss, calling out for her momma.

Together we went into her room. The second we opened the door, Carlie stopped fussing and laughed as Bella walked over to her crib. While I stayed close to the door, Bella picked up Bunny and Carlie's blanket, laying them down in the crib, before she gently settled our daughter back against the mattress. This time, our baby didn't fuss, she cried before sitting up as Bella did her best to sooth our little one. When she stood up, Bella turned her head towards me, and I went to them.

Gently, I laid her back down, and her cries increased in volume and intensity, even as both of us rubbed her back. The advice Esme had given was to give her some comfort to let her know that she was safe and that we were close by. When Bella took my hand we told Carlie we loved her before leaving her room. The second the door closed, Bella was in my arms.

"Listen to her, Edward. She doesn't get this, not at all."

"Do you remember how she smiled at us, and stopped fussing when you went to her?"

All my love did was nod once. "She knows she's safe, and she knows we won't let her get hurt." Even though I said those words, hearing Carlie's loud cries mixed in with a few screams wasn't easy to take.

"I can't stand here and listen. She'll figure it out when she's older, and we aren't taking her back to her bed, just rocking her back to sleep."

As Bella talked, I listened to what she couldn't hear. Carlie had lain back down in her bed. Even though she was still crying pretty frantically, she had also pulled her blanket and Bunny into her arms. "Bella, she's laying down now, and she's hugging her friends. Let's give her a few more minutes."

Her arms around me tightened, and we waited. The crying became less frantic, and after about five minutes, her breathing hitched, but the cries had stopped. It was Bella who led us back to our room and after she climbed into bed, I settled in next to her, shifting her body until her back was pressing against my chest.

"I feel like crying. Esme was right, she can do this. One more thing she doesn't need me for."

"That's not true."

"I know, just my frustration talking is all. Will you hum to me?"

After kissing the back of Bella's head, I shut my eyes and began to hum her lullaby. When I finished, she rolled over and faced me.

"I've been thinking that we should just elope. That way my mom won't feel like she was left out, and we would be able to be a family. When you were gone, I thought a lot about that night. Carlisle said you didn't want to take my soul, which will happen I guess when I'm turned. I want us to be married for both of us but also for you. All the talk Alice and I did, caused me to think about the time you came from. If I'd have lived in that time, we wouldn't be in this house or likely not even have Carlie would we?"

Before answering her, I brushed a strand of hair away from her face. "I don't remember what it was like too much when I was living, but that part has stuck with me. Our parents would have arranged for us to have a first dinner, followed by walks in the park, with a chaperone close by, to be sure we didn't do anything that was considered improper. I would have sent you letters, sometimes with a bouquet of flowers. There would have been more dinners before our engagement was announced. You would not have worn my mother's ring, but had one made for you."

"But I like her ring, and I don't want another one," Bella defended.

"I like you wearing it and I don't want to get another for you, but in that time it would have been different. To answer your question, no, we would not be living in a home together. If I would have gotten you pregnant, it would have been something that would not have been shared with many. We would have gone away, been married quickly, staying away until our friends would have believed that we had a baby after we were wed."

"I like this time better, and no shame for what happened, not from me."

When my Bella smiled for me, I leaned in tracing her lips with my tongue before pressing them against hers gently. Her kisses were more demanding this time. When she dipped her tongue into my mouth, I nibbled at it lightly before sucking on it. Bella moaned, pressing closer to me. When I felt myself harden, I pulled away slightly. "Careful," I whispered, more to myself than to her.

We rested just a few inches apart, while Bella caught her breath, and I focused on calming myself.

"I'm not sure I can wait, or want to anymore. If we conceive, then we do. I don't want our baby to be an only child. It was lonely for me. Being with all of you, watching Emmett wrestling with you or Jasper, Alice and Rosalie sitting side by side with their heads stuck together while they look at designs, seeing that, I know I want that for Carlie. I want her to have a brother or sister to grow up with. I know it means we have to be very careful about being seen, but there is more. I want you to be a part of this. You didn't get to see her being born, or for that matter, feel my stomach when she kicked. If we don't get pregnant, we don't, but if we do, then let it happen."

Not having the words to respond I pulled her into my arms, just holding her. Those wonderful things she said, were the things I longed for. Selfish as it may seem, seeing her carry my child, watching that child enter the world, and being there for every milestone was something I desperately wanted. If it happened let it happen. "I love you, and I don't want to wait for us to get married. Will you let me make some arrangements with the rest of our family?"

"Yes," she breathed against my shoulder.

After Carlie and Bella had eaten breakfast, and after the kitchen was clean, I left them to do more exploring of our new home. I flew through the woods, jumping over the river in spite of the fact that we now had a bridge to cross. Before I got to the door, it was open and Alice's thoughts were loud in my head.

"You will not elope, and I know what we can do. Can you two wait a few more days?"

What she had planned would be a nice celebration, so I agreed. After that my sister disappeared, taking Rosalie and Esme upstairs while I went to the back of the house to Carlisle's study. Even though I hadn't made a sound, my father told me to enter as soon as I arrived at the closed door.

On his desk were a whole lot of old leather covered books, faded due to sun exposure. His thoughts had been on that boy he met along with legends dating back to several hundreds of years before Christ.

"Before Aro?"

My father nodded. "Aro once told me that his creator was the father of us all. He only spoke of it once, and it was in sworn secrecy. Not even Esme knows this, so please don't talk about it."

"No, I won't. Why this interest?"

His thoughts went to some of the questions Bella's father had asked the night he found out the truth about our family. "I haven't thought about that conversation with Aro since that day. If there is truth to what he said, maybe answers for Carlie and her gifts, along with just how long she'll be with us will be with him."

What Carlisle wasn't voicing aloud, was his worry on how dangerous this individual could be, and also on the parts of the Volturi Castle that were off limits, in particular Aro's private library."

"You think there are writings that chronicle this being that fathers us all?"

"Yes, but perhaps its better just to leave it with history. It is best not to draw any interest to our situation. Now, I know you didn't come in here to talk about legends." Carlisle folded his hands in front of him as I began.

"Bella and I don't want to wait to be married. We also want to have another child."

Carlisle's thoughts were of worry and joy. "You have been alone too long, and she is your mate, Edward. I just wish I would have seen it sooner."

"That is true for me as well. I know you are worried, can you tell me why?"

"It seems that from Carlie's birth and the birth of the boy I met, Curtis, that it puts a lot of stress on the baby and the mother. Both of them were born prematurely."

"And Bella was brutally tortured by Victoria, which would explain a lot about why Carlie was born so early. You said Curtis was born two months early, could that have been because his mother wasn't in good health to begin with?"

My father nodded, having considered that already. "This also means being even more discreet, especially for you and Bella."

"These are things we are willing to do."

Carlisle stood, walking around his desk to me. When I stood up we hugged. "I'm very proud of the man you have become, and I will start looking into ways to help Bella if you do indeed conceive another baby."

When I walked back into the front room, Rosalie was there alone. Her thoughts were a mix of happiness and sorrow.

"I wish he would have told me."

"I don't know what to say Rosalie." For the first time I felt sorry for her, more than I ever had. My sister wanted to have children of her own. Finding out that she might have been able before she turned, was eating at her. "Have you talked to Emmett?"

Rosalie didn't answer right away as she sat down at the piano. "No, because he would feel guilty about not being able to make that happen for me."

When I stood in front of her, she looked up at me. "Talk to him. One thing I'm learning is not to hide things from Bella. It doesn't help anyone in the long run, and you two have been together enough that he will know what to say or just be there to hold on to you."

My sister was surprised by my advice, and offered me a smile. "When did you become so smart about this sort of stuff?"

"It hasn't been long, and I have much to learn. Listen, you can come visit Carlie anytime you want. If we have another baby, we'll need all the help we can get."

It was rare when the two of us got along and ever more so when we hugged. After she left to find Emmett, I headed back to Bella and our daughter, ready to spent time with them.

There was laughter coming from Carlie's room, along with music from a CD her Gran had sent with several books on child development for Bella and I to read over. The two of them were dancing to the theme song to **Winnie the Pooh.** Neither of them were aware of my presence, and if Bella would have seen me, I knew she would stop. The moment Carlie saw me, she stopped dancing and a second later Bella froze though only for a moment before she knelt down hugging our little girl. Carlie had projected to show Bella I was there, though this time she wasn't crying, just resting safely against her momma's chest.

"You were watching us," Bella said as her face turned red.

"I liked what I saw."

Carlie lifted her cheek away from her mother's chest, looking back at me before she stood up toddling a few steps until she was in my arm. The projection she gave me was of dancing with her Momma, more so of how Bella looked when she danced. "Did you like that?"

"Momma do."

"She did?"

Carlie smiled at me. "Dadda do." Our little girl got back on her feet as Bella got the music going again. I knelt down, and wiggled and jiggled around as Carlie tried to mimic her momma, who was on her feet shaking her head and waving her arms. The next few songs were all related to **Winnie the Pooh**, including **The Tigger Song**, which was a short one. On that song, Bella bounced and our baby did her best to follow her lead before the song came to an end, replaced by another.

"Come on Dadda, get up and dance crazy like us." When Bella reached for my hand, I held on, letting her pull me up, showing my ladies exactly how crazy Dadda could dance. Bella's laughter was followed by our daughters, and when I stopped and glared at her, she kept laughing. I growled softly before I reached Bella in two steps tickling her every place I could find. Bella laughed, trying to push me away as she slid to the floor with me following. Next to us, Carlie was still dancing, though stopped when she saw her momma laughing as I continued to tickle her.

"Carlie, get Dadda."

Our baby ran to us, hugging her momma, effectively blocking the spots under Bella's ribs with her small body. I moved my finger gently under Carlie's arm pit and wiggled it until she started to laugh, learning that this wasn't scary, but fun. When she got away from me and began to run, I got on my hands and knees crawling after her, snagging the back of her shirt before pulling Carlie back in my arms, cradling her to me while I nibbled her neck.

Her laughter filled the room, though as she grew red in the face, I let her rest. "Mo." Carlie struggled to be let down. As I let her go, she ran back the other way, laughing when I began to crawl after her.

Once our very tired baby had a snack along with a sippy cup, and was snug in her bed for a nap, Bella and I sat down on one of the mismatched sofas in our front room. "I enjoyed being with both of you."

"I enjoyed watching Carlie figure out that it was fun for you to tickle us and crawl after her. Did you talk to Carlisle?"

"I did. He was worried about Carlie's premature birth and the little boys, but also realizes there were circumstances that caused both of them."

"Even with the little boy?"

"His mother wasn't healthy to begin with." Bella nodded. "He wanted to make sure we realized that we will have to be very discreet if we do have another baby, more so than we are now."

"I guessed that, but it's worth the care to bring another baby into this world, and this time, have it planned."

"Alice was waiting for me. She saw that we talked about eloping, and asked that we give her a few days."

"But how can we make a wedding work?" As she asked that, Alice's thoughts filled my mind.

"She's on her way to talk about it."

When my sister arrived she had three fabric bags in her hands and a huge smile on her face. "Bella, this is going to work beautifully."

In the beginning, Alice talked to both of us. As time went on she focused more on Bella, as my love relaxed, realizing that we could indeed have a wedding, along with having our families there to celebrate.

In our room, I walked over to the desk that was once in Bella's room. It had been sanded down and totally refinished to look antique. Her journals were kept in the top drawer, and I left that one alone, pulling open the bottom drawer where I kept some of my things. Last night as we had talked, I recalled some of what it was like to be a young man of 17 during the time I'd lived in. When I wrote, it was usually for research papers that I'd done over and over again. I had only written to Bella once to invite her to our meadow.

Taking out a thick piece of paper, I held it up while thinking about the things I wanted to put down for her. After getting out a bottle of ink and a calligraphy pen, those words that were swimming around in my mind flowed out onto the page until it was filled. After putting it in the envelope that went with my writing paper, I got out a candle, one I hadn't used before, and a lighter. Once enough red wax had dripped on to the envelope, I took out a small stamp with our family crest and pushed it into the wax. After it was dry, I took it to her pillow and put it there before going for a run. My trip to get a white rose from a floral shop in Hoquiam took seven minutes.

In our front room, Alice and Bella were finishing up. Alice's thoughts on what I'd just done were swimming in my mind. She approved very much so, and smiled at me before she left the house.

"How long has she been planning this?" Bella sounded a little overwhelmed but also relieved.

"She planned her marriage to Jasper, and all the weddings for Emmett and Rosalie. Our celebration was planned when she had her vision of us talking about eloping."

As we sat on the sofa, Bella snuggled against my left side. "How many times have they been married?"

"They have wed several times. It has always fit in with us living in a place for a couple of years. Once Emmett and Rosalie graduate from high school, they get married before they got off to college."

"Is that something we will need to do, once I'm turned?"

"Only if we want to."

While she snuggled closer to me, I wrapped my arms around Bella enjoying the quiet time we were getting. Our moment was taken when Alice's thoughts flowed into my mind. "Hey, I need you to be strong and know that what I'm about to say isn't something that is going to change our plans."

My loved pulled away from my chest, looking up at me, concern etching the soft features of her face. "Charlie called the house, when he couldn't get you on your phone. Your mother decided to come for a surprise visit. He said she's driving in from Seattle."

Her eyes closed as she took in a few deep breaths. "She can't see the baby, not until we figure out what to say. Wait, did Charlie tell her that we are in town?"

"He told her we were here, yes."

"Crap." Seeing her shaken again, was difficult and as she leaned back against me I held on.

Alice knocked at the door, coming in when we told her too. Again she had an idea and one which eased my mind.

"Bella, why can't she know about Carlie's gift? Hear me out. You've said that she likes books on things like psychic activity and telekinesis, things on heightened thinking and that are different, right?"

"Yes, oh yes." A second later the two of them were hugging. "She'll just think it's a gift, and we don't have to worry about vampire, because…Alice you are wonderful."

While they hugged, I heard Carlie stirring, and left them to take care of her. In her crib she was resting on her side, hugging Bunny and her blanket. When she saw me, she rolled onto her back rubbing her eyes. "Did you have a good nap?" Once Carlie was in my arms, she pressed her cheek against my chest. Gently I swayed with her, humming her mother's lullaby.

Carlie lifted her cheek, showing me Bella. "Let's go find her." Her cheek pressed back against my chest while I carried her out to our front room. The second she saw her momma, Carlie leaned out, snuggling against Bella once she was in her arms.

"How does she figure things out so fast?" Bella asked, rocking our baby with a look of astonishment on her face.

"With the speed that comes in having a vampire brain, and as I said, she's great at planning weddings."

Bella chuckled. "She should go into business."

"Don't tempt her."

Agreeing that Renee didn't need to know we already had our own place, we made plans to stay at the house for the remainder of the day. It was a little after three in the afternoon when Charlie's truck pulled off of the main road. Our baby was upstairs in her little playroom, with Rosalie and Emmett keeping an eye on her for us, long enough for Renee to be let in on our secret. While Jasper and Carlisle played a game of chess, and Esme was busy in the kitchen making refreshments, Alice was sitting at the dining room table going over the several lists she had already made for our celebration.

At the piano, I played softly with Bella by my side. "How are you feeling?"

"You ask me that a lot, but I'm feeling better, and worried."

"Just remember to tell her what Alice said," I reassured, keeping up with my playing. Bella kept her cheek leaning against my shoulder as the truck pulled up in front of the house. Carlisle stood up, and when Charlie knocked at the door, my father answered as I stopped playing. Alice had them style their hair differently. Carlisle had slicked his back a little on the sides. Esme had her hair pulled back. The rest of us didn't need to worry too much about our appearances.

"Bella." The woman I loved left my side, walking to her mother with a confidence I know she wasn't feeling.

Charlie looked at Esme and Carlisle with an amused expression on his face, but didn't let Renee see.

"Mom, these are Edward's parents."

She shook their hands, as Alice looked at me with a smile on her face. All of us had a hot hand pouch in our pockets and Renee hadn't noticed anything different, even though our skin was rock solid.

"You have such a beautiful home."

"Thank you, would you like a bite to eat? I made some refreshments." When she followed Esme into the kitchen, everyone relaxed.

Charlie gave his daughter a hug. "Sorry, I didn't know what to do."

"It's alright. We need you to know that we are getting ready to tell her about Carlie. Alice reminded me that this shouldn't really surprise her being that she believes in higher thinking and heightened abilities."

Chief Swan chuckled as Alice walked over and gave him a hug. "I'll have to hand it to you Alice, I would never have thought of it."

Upstairs, Carlie was getting bored of her toys, and after excusing myself, knowing that Bella had plenty of support when she talked to her mother, I went to my baby. Carlie projected an image of Bella as I picked her up hugging her to me as I felt her gasp. "Shh, you're alright my angel. Momma is downstairs with your Gran, but we need to wait up here for just a little longer. Will you show me what you have in your oven?"

My baby shook her head before settling her cheek against my shoulder. When the music from her oven began to play, due to Rosalie turning the little knob, Carlie glanced down before wanting to go over to it. Instead of cooking she shook her head and wiggled her arms around as Bella had done with her earlier in the day.

"Go Carlie," Emmett said as she spun around like I had. As she spun again she fell back, landing on her bottom. Rosalie picked her up, and gave her to me. I hugged her close as she gasped again, knowing from Rosalie's thoughts that Carlie had projected my image into her mind.

Once Renee knew about Carlie, and was told about our wedding in two days, everyone was more relaxed. She got the grand tour of our house. after that she was focused on being Gran to Carlie. Knowing how overwhelmed our daughter was becoming, Jasper had everyone who didn't need to be around, find other places to go. Charlie found a game to watch on the TV, and I sat down on the sofa on the other end, while Bella and Renee sat playing with Carlie. Renee was going on about how marvelous it was that Carlie had such a gift, and understood the importance of keeping it quiet.

"Maybe she won't ever need to speak," Renee was saying, as Charlie looked over at me. All I could do was shrug, leaving Bella to explain our theory which was that she would learn the words by showing us the images.

By the time Charlie left with Renee, taking her to a small bed in breakfast in town, and we arrived at our home, Carlie had long since fallen asleep. After Bella and I settled her in her crib, I held my love's hand and led her to our room, shutting the door with my foot before pulling her into my arms. Her back was pressed against my chest. After moving her long hair away from her left side, I pulled her sweatshirt away from her neck, before pressing a kiss there.

Bella leaned her head back against my chest. "I've never been so tired in my life."

As I ran my tongue behind her ear, Bella gasped, and I knew she was no longer tired. When I blew against the skin that I had wet with my tongue, she sagged against me.

"Edward, if you don't stop, I'm not going to be able to control myself."

"Hmm is that so bad? You do know that we can do more than just kiss, it's called foreplay." Normally I wasn't willing to let it go that far, because of how much I wanted to love her with my body, all the time worrying that we wouldn't be able to stop. Tonight there was a difference. When I eased her sweatshirt upward, Bella pulled her arms from the sleeves. After dropping it onto the floor, I let her go and moved in front of her. Bella's eye lids were drooping as I pulled her against me and bent to kiss her. Bella surprised me by grasping the back of my head in effort to force us together at a quicker rate. Her lips moved frantically against mine, her teeth biting at them. When I parted my lips her warm tongue invaded me. I sucked it further in wrapping my arms around her while pulling her body against mine firmly continuing to nibble and suck her tongue. When Bella pulled it out I pressed my lips to hers, forcing her lips open before slipping my tongue into her mouth. The sweetness I tasted along with her moans of pleasure, had me fully aroused.

Bella's hand sliding between us a moment before it was pressed against the bulge in my jeans caused a growl. She increased the pressure, as I began to rub against it pulling my tongue out of her mouth before pushing it back in. Moving away from her lips, I kissed my way down her neck, sucking in the skin at her jugular when she squeezed against my bulge. Releasing her skin, I growled before kissing my way down to the top of her breast.

Bella gasped, moving her hand away, as I began to nuzzle against the right side of her breast. Her scent was that of strawberry from her shampoo and the sweetness of her blood mixed with the heady scent of sexual desire. As I continued to nuzzle her covered breast, my own hand moved between us. When I cupped between her legs Bella tilted her head back breathing hard. I lifted my head watching her while I rubbed my hand against her core.

"Don't stop," she gasped."

At some point we ended up on the floor, both unclothed on our sides. There was so much more that I wanted to share with her, than just foreplay, and her resolve to wait until after we were wed was much stronger than my own. When her body began to cool, I sat up bringing her to lie cradled against my chest, walking over to our bed. The note and flower I left earlier was still on her pillow, so I moved them to her bedside table before pulling back the blankets.

"What's that?"

After the covers were over her, I picked up the envelope and the rose. "Just a little something I wrote for you."

She sat up pulling the covers with her while I propped up her pillows. While she held the flower to her nose, taking in the sweet scent, I moved to my side of the bed. Once under the covers, I scooted next to her as she leaned into my arms, opening the note.

_My love,_

_There is so much I want to say to you, so much I am thankful for. There are no words eloquent enough to write or to say in order to thank you for letting me be a part of your life once more. The monster that I once believed myself to be has been cast away and I am once more a man capable of loving you. Dreams of spending a lifetime and longer with you fill my thoughts, instead of the despair that loneliness once brought. With you and Carlie my life has meaning. The future for us will be a bright one. You are my Beautiful Bella, and there is nothing more that I want or need other than your love to share every day and night for as long as we exist._

_Yours Always_

_Edward Anthony Masen Cullen_

Her breathing hitched as she folded the letter back into place before she looked up at me. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. Gently I leaned in kissing them away. "You are so beautiful. Thank you for making me feel human again."

"You don't need to ever thank me. We didn't know what we were getting into, or I should say I didn't know." Bella sniffed as I put my hand against her head easing it against my chest. "You talked about being impulsive, and feeling selfish. Sometimes I think about what I was like at that time. I pushed a lot. When I wanted you to turn me, it was because I was afraid of being alone, and afraid of losing you. There wasn't a we back then. It was all about me, so I'm the one who should apologize."

"There is no need. Are you warm enough?"

She nodded as I slid us down to rest on the mattress. Long after she fell asleep against me, my thoughts drifted to the future. There would be disagreements, but I knew we were capable of getting through them. As long as I had her by my side, anything was possible.

**AN:**_ Alright, closer to the wedding now. Tell me what you thought, I love the reviews, and thank you all for the input. Thank you always to all of you who have read this story and others. You are the best._


	16. Sempre-Forever

**Chapter 16: Sempre (Forever)**

**Bella**

It was truly mind blowing how fast things were coming together for the wedding. My dress was right out of a Fairytale. How Alice had gotten it here two days after asking us not to elope was a secret she wasn't telling. Even with the ability to read minds, Edward wasn't able to get the answer. All she would say is that it was a vintage masterpiece. After two fittings the dress was like a second skin. To keep it a secret, no one but she and I were allowed to look at it. Both of us wanted to surprise Edward, me more so than her.

Second to the last day of waiting, she banished Carlie and I to Charlie's house, wanting me to be surprised when I saw their home decorated for the occasion. My mother was free to go over, having a field day with all of the preparations. It was strange being in my childhood home, knowing that my life was about to change, and that I would be Edward's wife very soon.

An image of Edward flashed in my mind, staying for a few seconds before it went away. My baby sat on her activity blanket looking at me, a serious expression on her little face. When she was with Edward or me alone, her gift didn't frighten her. Even with all three of us together, using her gift didn't scare her, mostly because we didn't react emotionally.

"Your Dadda is camping with Uncle Emm and Uncle Jasper."

"Dadda." Another image popped into my mind of Edward holding her.

When I held out my arms for her to sit with me on the sofa, Carlie frowned before getting to her feet. Once she was close enough, I lifted her up, cradling her against my chest. "I miss him too, baby."

She flashed another image of him holding her, and I could only guess that it was a question, wishing she would talk as well as use images. "He'll see you after bath time."

This time she showed me her sippy cup, and after kissing her, I got up, carrying her to the kitchen. While I held it under the hot tap water, I told her what it was. "Cup." My daughter smiled at me, holding the handles on both sides of her sippy as I walked over to the table and sat down. Her soft bronze hair fanned out over my arm. It was long enough now that I could pull it back into a pig tail or pony tails.

A sudden knock at the door got our attention. Carlie pulled out her sippy cup glancing towards the front entry. After putting it down on the table, we went to see who it was. Finding Jake on the other side was a surprise.

He offered us a smile, though it quickly changed as his eyes fixed on my baby. As she turned her head, pressing it against my neck while whimpering, it was evident why he looked so stunned.

"What did you see?" Without thought, I rubbed my hand over her back, holding the door open as Jake finally came inside, still looking stunned.

"Um, me."

"She uses this to tell us things. I think she was letting you know she remembers you."

While he sat down on the sofa, before joining him, I got the sippy before sitting down in my dad's favorite seat, his recliner.

"She has gotten so big."

"It's a relief to see her growing. I think she's grown three inches since we saw you last. So, I guess Charlie let you guys know I was here?"

"Seth did actually. Do you mind if I tell you some things." When I nodded he continued. "What I did at the hospital was stupid, and I'm really sorry. You were going through so much, and it was just wrong."

"It was a hard time for us all. There are a lot of things that happened with us, that were due to me clinging to you. I've always been afraid of being alone, or was afraid for a while because of all the unknowns. I used you Jake, and I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "The way I see it we both sort of did the same thing."

Being able to talk calmly with him was new and nice. "So, the last time we talked, you said something about mates?"

He sat up, smiling at me. "It's not as strange now. Leah really isn't bad once you get past that bit…, um that gruff exterior." For the next little bit as my daughter fell asleep in my arms, Jacob told me about his new relationship with Leah. How great it was along with how much of a relief it was to find someone who could understand being in love with someone he couldn't have. The way he said it didn't hurt, and because I loved Edward and always had, the fact he found her, and she knew what he was feeling due to Sam, made me happy for him.

"So I actually do have some news."

As he began, I stood up carrying Carlie over to the Pack-N-Play. Once she was resting there, I sat down next to Jake.

"She's pregnant."

Not a sound filtered through the house as I looked at him, and he looked back. "I thought that wasn't something that could happen."

"She didn't either. When she told me, I thought she was joking. I mean I love her Bells, I do, but, well shit." He pulled his hands through his thick hair. "With you and Carlie, I think it was safe in a way because deep down there was the knowledge that we wouldn't be together and that one day he would come back. You know how karma works?"

Even though I wasn't sure where he was going with this, I nodded.

"When you found out you were going to have her, and you told me, and after finding out that they knew it could happen, my dad your dad talking, it pissed me off. Yeah I love Leah, but with you, I don't know. So I was being all judgmental, talking to Leah, and don't worry she's not going to judge anything. So anyway she asks me if that happened to us, how I would feel. After that she told me she was pregnant, and Karma bit me in the ass."

"Jake, who else knows?"

"Besides you, just me and Leah. Um, I kind of took off on her."

That surprised me. "Not kind of." My voice was harsh because I knew what it was like to be left alone.

He grabbed his hair again and the anger left. Gently, I laid my hand on his shoulder. "Right now, she needs you Jake, trust me on that one."

After a moment he faced me, looking like a scared little boy. "What do I do?"

"Talk to her, be there for her, because she's probably just as scared as you are, maybe even more so. With her being pregnant, it is very likely she can't phase. That won't be easy for her. You also need to talk to Sue together. Don't make her do it alone Jacob."

We talked for a little longer before I hugged him, watching him jog away from the back of the house into the woods. Back in the front room, I stood over my sleeping baby, thinking about Jacob, wondering if Edward had been this afraid. He didn't' run away when he found out, quite the opposite he took charge when I needed him too. What he had run from was my want to become immortal.

A car pulling up in front of the house brought me to the window. My mom got out of the car, and I greeted her at the door letting her know Carlie was asleep.

In the kitchen, we sat at the table talking about Phil. He had been invited, but because of his job, he couldn't make it with such short notice. "It's likely better anyway because of Carlie's gift, I'm not sure he would really understand it the way I do."

That he couldn't come even though it was hard for mom, as a relief.

"How are you doing?"

"Good, it's kind of nice being back here before I move on with my life. Carlie has been more at ease, now that we aren't around all of the activity."

"But you miss Edward."

"Always"

"It's been nice to get to know him and his family. He is so mature, and so good with my grand baby." If only she knew the truth behind why he was so mature, but that was a secret she wouldn't know, not even when I was turned.

Bath time was splash time, and the only time my little girl was vocally loud. She didn't use words that were understandable, and loved to just make noise. As she played, I was content to sit on the little wicker stool watching her. Maybe all of this noise she was making was a precursor to her finally using words. At our house, since the tub was so huge, I took my baths with her. This tub was standard size and with all of the splashing, there wasn't enough room to hide from her.

"Iya I yey." My daughter lifted her hands and brought them down in the water. Her splash didn't flow out of the tub, because I didn't put to much in to begin with. After a few more minutes of play, I got out her bath sponge, one with a duck tail and head, pouring sudsing it up with her lavender baby bath. While she chewed on her pink rubber duck, I washed her back first and manage to get her right arm clean before she pulled it away splashing more water, as she screeched. It was touch and go getting her left arm wiped down, and when I stood her up she started fussing. Once she was sitting back down she went back to her playing. Tonight her hair needed to be washed, and that was usually best done with help. Lately getting her hair washed caused major fits. We had tried those neat little hats to keep the water out of her ears and off of her face, but she hated wearing it more than anything else. Even when I was in our bath with her, it was a battle, and so far she wasn't projecting anything that showed us what scared and upset her.

Grabbing a regular wash cloth, I got it wet and started wiping it on her shoulders getting the ends of her hair wet first while she was distracted. When I laid it on her head, she pulled it away looking at me as her lips puckered.

"Carlie, put it on your head."

Taking a dry cloth, I put mine on my head to show her, but she let it go, playing with her bath toys again.

"How about some help?"

Edward's voice startled me, but also made me very happy as he knelt next to the tub. When Carlie saw him she clapped her hands.

"Da da da da da!"

"Yes Carlie?" She stood up reaching for him. Even though he was dressed, and didn't have a towel over his shirt, he still hugged her. She didn't let go of him, and instead of washing her hair, I got her towel wrapping it around her as best I could. After she was ready for bed, dressed in a new Disney Princess Nightgown mom had gotten her, we sat in my old bed with Carlie on Edward's lap as he read to her. The soft cadence of his voice was lulling me asleep, though when I glanced at our baby, her eyes were wide open, looking at the pictures in the book.

Normally after story time, Carlie wanted me to rock her. Tonight she clung to Edward, and as he settled down in the rocking chair with her resting against his chest, I headed to the bathroom to take a shower, my thoughts on Jake, hoping that he and Leah were talking.

Resting in my double bed against Edward's body, I missed the comfort of our Queen. We had just a little more room which was nice, though after being away from him all day, having him close was what I needed. "Jacob came by," I whispered as his hand rubbed down my back.

"I thought I smelled wolf." His tone was gentle. "How was his visit."

"Sad in a way. Leah is having his baby, and he's scared half to death. It's weird, but I won't go into it."

His finger slid under my chin, and when I lifted my head there was only love in his eyes for me. "You don't have to hide anything from me Bella. I know what his friendship means to you."

After laying my cheek back against his chest, I told him about Jake's visit and about what it was like while he was gone. "We both needed to cling to something. I think he was more in love with the idea that he was needed to protect me and Carlie for a time. He told me it was safe to love me because deep down he knew you would come back one day. Did you want to run when Alice told you about Carlie?"

"No. Even though I was astonished by the news, the need to be there for the two of was more powerful than everything else. When Jacob sees his child for the first time there won't be any doubts for him on what he needs to do for his family."

Because it was a sunny day when I woke up, Renee arrived after breakfast, and we drove up to Port Angeles. It was chilly, but there wasn't any wind to make it too cold. We started out at Francis Street Park. Carlie was content to ride in her stroller that my mom pushed as we made our way around the paths. "I forgot how beautiful it is here when the sun is out."

"Did you come here with Dad?"

Mom glanced at me, smiling. "Yes. In the summer, before you were born, Charlie would come home from work and tell me to get ready to go out. He knew how trapped I felt staying home all day by then, and he was really trying to make it better for me. We only had his cruiser, and there were only so many places to go in Forks as you know. He borrowed Billy's old truck for a while and would bring me here to walk at the pier."

"What happened?" I'd never really asked her to give me details before, just knowing the base story that she hated the rain and moved to Phoenix with me to start a new life.

"We fell in love so fast, Bella. I wanted to see more than just the small city of Forks. I thought for a while that if I showed Charlie what it was like to see other places, he would want to go with me. His mom and Dad were older, and his heart was always here. When you were born, I wanted you to have more opportunities than what Forks offered. We started to argue, and he was stressed because by then his mother had passed away and his father needed more care. He started spending more time at work after your grandpa died, when you were five weeks old. By then I was talking to your Gran, and admitted that I just couldn't stay there anymore, and that what Charlie and I had wasn't strong enough for me remain in Forks. It was very selfish, but there was you to think about too. I didn't want you to grow up hearing us fight.

We sat down on a bench. Carlie was sleep in her stroller as mom went on.

"One night when he got home, he found three suitcases at the bottom of the stairs. He came into your room and found me rocking you to sleep. We didn't say anything until after you were in your crib. I took his hand and led him downstairs, pulling him down to the couch next to me. I told him that I had fallen out of love with him, and that I couldn't live in Forks. That you deserved to see the sun, and that Gran was going to pick us up in the morning.

That night I slept in your rocking chair holding you as I cried. The next morning the second he heard you crying, he came in and got you changed and dressed. He made breakfast for me, bacon and eggs, while you nursed, After you finished eating, he took you to his recliner and rocked you until it was time for us to leave.

When she stopped talking, she pulled me into her arms. Hearing her story hurt, not only for her, but also for my dad, and maybe a little more for him. I couldn't imagine doing that to Edward, but there was also a maturity that I had that she never would. "I hope you don't think to badly of me. It was why I always told you to go to school and find yourself before you committed to marriage and family. I didn't want you to have to go through what I did."

It took a while for me to find my voice. "I never knew, and I don't think badly of you mom." Knowing her as well as I did, it didn't surprise me why she left, it also brought some truth to those rumors about my dad's flighty ex-wife.

After Carlie woke up we found lunch at McDonalds. Today it wasn't packed with noisy kids and while mom held her on her lap, she ate bites of chicken on her own, while I fed her yogurt.

"Her hair is getting so long," Mom said as she ran her fingers through it.

"I know. It's long enough to put up, though that never lasts long, she always yanks the hair ties out.

Mom chuckled as I fed my baby another bite of yogurt. "She wants to be wild and free." When Carlie was done with her food, she projected her sippy cup, but only to me. As she rested in my arms drinking that, I ate my salad while mom had a chicken sandwich.

"Do you and Edward want to have any more children?"

"Yes. I've watched how much fun he has with his siblings, and even Jacob with all of his friends. It would be nice for Carlie to have a brother or a sister."

Mom nodded. "How long will you wait?"

"We aren't using any protection, so as fast as nature will allow."

My mother smiled at me, and was very supportive of the idea of Carlie being a big sister. "If I would have stayed with Charlie, I would have wanted to give you a younger brother or sister. At the time, that didn't enter my mind. I was in flight mode."

We finished off our visit to Port Angeles by going to Port Angles City Pier. Carlie decided she wanted to walk and as she held my hand and my moms' we swung her between us, laughing with her. My baby loved looking at the ships on the water. I got a few pictures of my mom pointing out at the boats with Carlie in her arms, happy that we had gotten this time to finally talk, and that I knew more about my past.

Once we got home, and she left to go to the bed and breakfast, I gave Carlie a bath, washing her hair even though she had her fit. Once she was dressed for bed, I read to her, knowing that we wouldn't see her daddy until tomorrow. Yes we had a baby, but both of us wanted to honor not seeing one another until I was walking down the isle.

In my arms, Carlie's breath was still hitching from her earlier fuss, and because her daddy wasn't here. "Shh, he'll see us tomorrow sweet angel."

As she drifted to sleep cradled against me, I continued to rock her thinking about what mom had told me. My life with Edward wouldn't always be perfect. We would have disagreements. But my thoughts kept coming back to how long Edward had been on this earth. He knew a great deal about things like finances and savings. He had a house in Chicago that his parents had left him. With that kind of difference in our mental ages, maybe there wouldn't be to many arguments. Knowing that Alice was going to be here early to start getting me ready for the big day, along with Rosalie, my mom and Esme, I got up and carried my baby to her crib shifting her from my arms to her mattress without disturbing her sleep.

It didn't feel like much later when Carlie's loud cries brought me to her crib. "Hey, you're alright sweet heart." Her crying continued as I checked her diaper which was dry and clean, and as I began to rock her, she projected her daddy's image. It wasn't surprising to hear a knock at the door. Knowing it was Edward I got a diaper and Bunny along with her Blanket before shutting my eyes to tell him to come in.

Carlie's cries stopped the second she was out of my arms, and a gentle kiss was brushed to my lips before the door shut behind him.

The next time I woke up it was to my daughter's hand patting my face. When I opened my eyes mom was there smiling at me. "Happy Wedding day baby." We hugged around Carlie before she left us, allowing me to have a little time alone with my baby.

Did Dadda come see you?"

"Da da da."

When I lifted her above me, Carlie laughed straightening her legs. "Let's go see what's going on downstairs." The second I opened the door, the smell of all sorts of good things assaulted me senses. When we got to the bottom of the stairs, my baby wanted down, heading for the front room. The furniture had been moved around to accommodate a three way mirror. There was a card table set up holding markup, hair styling instruments, nail polish and a bunch of other beautification products.

I took in deep breath as Alice put her hand on my shoulder. "Deep breaths."

Once I'd done that she guided me to the kitchen. My mom was there with rollers in her hair wearing a robe. Esme smiled at me as she brought a plate of food. My stomach rumbled, and I decided to just think about eating to try and calm the case of nerves that had popped up the second I saw the front room.

A second later, Rosalie put my daughter on my lap. Carlie began to share my food eating bites of egg with her hands. I noticed how calm she was, and was glad Edward had come to be with her last night.

"Alright Renee, I need you upstairs please," Alice said as she came into the room.

My mom took one last sip from her coffee cup before leaving with Alice.

The rest of the morning and on into the afternoon was spent getting ready for this evening. It was overcast, but no rain was expected which was a blessing. Rosalie had left with my fussing baby after she projected Edward into all of our minds. It made it easier for me to focus on holding still while Alice finished with my hair. It had never been so curly, and once she used a pick to fluff it out, Alice pulled back the sides and pinned it up in back of my head.

My mother was with me when I slid into my dress, and kept blotting her eyes with a handkerchief. The woman in the mirror was a stranger to me. Somewhere there was the old Bella. This Bella had been turned into someone beautiful. I felt beautiful. Charlie's face appeared in the mirror behind me. He looked so handsome in his tux and hugged me with one arm.

"Where did our baby go, Renee?"

"I was just going to ask you that," Mom sniffed.

After we parted, Dad took my hand and put a velvet box into it. Inside was a Comb to hold my hair back. While Alice took it for me and replaced the one she had used, Dad told me that it had belonged to my Grandmother Swan, and that they had replaced the stones with real rubies and sapphires.

Outside, I expected to see my dad's truck waiting. Instead there was a Limo. "What happened to being discreet?"

My dad chuckled as he led me to the car. When all of us were seated, including Alice and Esme, the driver pulled away from the curb. During the drive I focused on the talk going on. This felt better than a dream, and I was so ready to see Edward. When the driver turned onto the long driveway leading up to the house, I noticed that all of the trees had white Christmas lights wrapped around them.

Alice smiled at me. "What do you think?"

"How beautiful it is."

The sidewalk leading up to the house was flanked by a long canopy trellis going straight up to the porch. There were all sorts of flowers intertwined in the trellis and the smell was like being in the tropics. As I got out of the car, I noticed we had been left alone

"You are beautiful." Charlie said.

"Thanks dad, for everything."

After we hugged he took my hand and put it under his arm. Taking a deep breath. I walked with him up the sidewalk hearing the piano starting to play the traditional Wedding March.

When we stepped inside my heart beat picked up and I felt my eyes begin to water. Not only were our families there, so was Angela and Ben, Sue and her son Seth were there with Billy. There were a few other people from Charlie's work that were like family to him. Angela's father was standing in front and Edward. The second I saw him there was nothing else.

Outside under a canopy of flowers hanging above us, my feet were on Edward's as he waltzed around the dance floo. He was my husband, my heart and my soul. "This has been the best day of my life," I murmured against his chest. Seeing him dressed up in a tux that would have been something he would have worn had we married in his time, was like another dream. So many dreams in one day, and a life time more to share with him.

"This is the best day of my entire existence, Mrs. Masen."

The music ended and something more upbeat began to play. I missed my baby, but we agreed that with the few here who wouldn't understand her gift, letting Mom and Esme take shifts with her upstairs was a better option. We would see her tomorrow. The second we parted, Emmett and Rosalie along with Alice and Jasper joined us. Both couples were really good at dancing. Knowing that I wasn't comfortable with dancing, much last dancing to something as upbeat as Twist and Shout, Edward left me with Charlie and Sue while he joined his after Angela and Been along with most our our guests joined in.

When my mom stepped out on the dance floor, I felt my cheeks redden, and realized that Esme must be on Carlie duty. My mom wasn't too bad at dancing, but not as well as Edward and his siblings, or even our other guests.

As I glanced at Sue, she seemed more comfortable, though she hadn't let go of Charlie's arm, the only exception being when we danced the Father Daughter Dance. She smiled at me. "Bella, you look so beautiful, and happy."

"I am happy." It was so tempting to ask her if Leah and Jake had talked to her, but until I got word from him, I wouldn't say anything.

Not long after that dance, the party began to wind down. Officer Marks and his wife were among the first to wish us well again, before Alice escorted them to the garage where all the cars had been parked.

Edward joined me as more people began to leave. The last to go were my parents, Sue, Seth, and Billy. I walked with mom to the limo, glad that they would get one more ride out of it.

"Oh Bella, I'm so proud of you, and so happy for you and Edward. Maybe you can take a Honeymoon once Carlie is a bit older. Oh, if you want me to, I can come stay with her."

Charlie walked over to us then, knowing that my mother would keep talking. When he put a hand on her shoulder, she sighed before leaning in to give me a hug. "I'll email you when I get home tomorrow night."

"Thanks mom, for everything."

After she began making her way to the Limo, it was just Charlie left with me. There was no hesitation before his arms were around me, and my cheek was pressed up against the jacket of his tux. "Dad, I, thank you. I'm so glad I have you, and that you stood by my side with Carlie, and with everything."

His arms tightened around me and I felt pressure on top of my head, a kiss. "I'm super proud of you kiddo. You are an amazing mom, and I know Edward is damn lucky to have you as his wife."

When I glanced up at him he cleared his throat. "Take care, let me know if you want me to help with Carlie."

"Absolutely."

There was one more hug shared before he walked to the limo. As it began to pull away, Edward's hand came to rest on my left shoulder. It wasn't like he had never left me here before, or my mother, but at the moment there was a huge lump in my throat. After the lights from the limo disappeared, I turned, wrapping my arms around Edward's waist.

"How is our daughter?"

"She's fussing, but Esme has it under control."

It was only because Esme was watching her along with Rosalie, which gave me the confidence to spend my first night alone in our house with my husband. "Take me home," I whispered.

The kisses started the moment my body was resting cradled against Edward's chest. When the request came for him to take me home, he had lifted me off of my feet, something that didn't bother me in the least. His kisses were gentle, searching while he walked with me in his arms. When there wasn't any more oxygen left in my lungs, his lips left mine, finding other places to kiss. My eyelids, then my cheeks, before his lips were back on mine.

The click of our door being opened barely registered in my mind as his lips had traveled to my neck. The sucking pull of my skin along with the coolness of his mouth sent shivers down my spine, though not due to being afraid, but being aroused by what Edward was doing. He was on the move again, as I felt his hand working at the tiny buttons on the back of the dress. Slowly my back became exposed, before my body was lowered, until my feet touched the floor.

For the first time since leaving the party, my eyes found Edward's. The look in his eyes were of love and need. It was as if he had given my body a command, for in the next moment my legs began to wobble. He eased me into his arms, and his hands finished with the buttons. Slowly he slid the dress from my left shoulder. The retreating fabric followed by Edward's kisses, along with his tongue occasionally following the path of his lips.

There was a heat building just below my belly button mixed with tightness. The more he undressed me, with his eyes and his hands, the stronger the heat became, until it felt as though I'd combust. When my dress was a pool at my feet, he reached for my hand, taking it as his head bent forward. After kissing my palm, he placed it on his shirt.

When I thought about what this would be like, undressing my husband in our room, I thought my hands would be shaking so bad, I wouldn't be able to do it. Instead, the buttons came undone without any of that. When his shirt was off, I put both of my hands over his nipples, standing on my tip toes as he lowered his head. My lips moved over his softly as I began to rub my palms over his skin. For the first time, I felt the lines that made up the muscles of his chest. In the meadow, there wasn't time to explore, because of the fear of him stopping before anything could get started.

Pulling away from his lips, I focused my eyes on his chest leaning in to follow the path of my palms, kissing every inch of his chest as his hands grasped gently at my hips. As I kissed my way lower to his stomach, Edward took in a deep breath letting out a soft growl. Without thought, I dipped my tongue into his belly button, pulling it out before dipping it back in.

"Bella," He growled, his hands holding on to the sides of my head. Having this kind of effect on him was nothing that I expected. The heat in my middle combusted, spreading to the juncture between my legs, which were shaking. His hands moved away from my head traveling down my sides as I stood back up, knowing that in another moment I'd be on the floor. It was his strength keeping me on my feet as I tilted my head up gasping as his lips crushed against mine, and his tongue moved into my mouth.

It was as if someone had turned on the heat, as he continued kissing me. Wanting the rest of his body uncovered, I made quick work of getting his slacks undone, hearing them drop to the floor as I slid my hands into his boxers. The moment I cupped around him, Edward let out a louder growl before the room spun. The next second my back was against the mattress of our bed and his naked body covered mine. His hard member rested between my legs. When my hand wrapped around it his eyes were on mine. He lifted his hips as I moved him to my entrance. In the next moment he was sinking slowly inside of me. My core drawing him in, contracting around him. The breath was driven out of me as he slid all the way in, before slowly pulling out.

Our bodies began to move together in a dance older than time itself. Edward's hands moved under my head, my back resting against his upper arms as he increased the speed. His lips brushed over mine lightly, as my breathing came out in harsh pants. My release caused his, and as I cried out calling his name over and over, he slid his hands down my back pulling me flush with his body as he spilled within me.

Time didn't exist as I lay on my left side being held in the arms of my husband. Our bodies were still joined after another session of love making, and the thought of ever having to leave his side was unpleasant.

"You are my life," he whispered.

"You are mine." His arms pulled me closer before he slid out of me. When he rolled on his back, Edward pulled me with him so that the upper half of my body rested against his bare chest. There was more needing to be said, more we needed to experience. My human body was spent, and my lids slid shut without my permission. "Sing to me."

"What should I sing?"

"Anything, so long as I can hear you." That last part came out as a mumble. His voice was soft at first as he began. The song he chose was Nat King Cole's **When I fall in Love**. It would be my new favorite when my brain could think. His love was more than enough for me. Our love would last forever, like the words in the song. The last thoughts that slipped through my mind were of the vision that was Edward waiting for me to walk down the isle to start our life together.

_**AN: I chose not to write the part of them sharing their vows. That was done really well in my opinion in the book, so just think of that between that and the party. As for Edward seeing to her, I figure he could due to him knowing so much about playing the piano and likely studying some music theory, at least that's what I like tho think so there you go. **_

_**I hope you all enjoyed this. More to come soon. Thank you for keeping up with the story and all the reviews and all the adds. You are the best readers I could ever ask for.** _


	17. Strength

**Chapter 17: Strength  
**

**Edward**

Going hunting on my own or with the other members of our family used to be my solace. That changed the night Bella became my wife. My solace was with her and our daughter in the life we were working to build together.

"Edward?"

Her soft, warm cheek against my chest shifted before her eyes were on mine. The moonlight coming in from the doors was just enough for her to see me. The smile on Bella's lips began to melt away the thoughts of disdain I had on leaving them earlier today, and being gone for most of the night.

"We missed you."

Even though there was no need to draw a breath, my chest heaved as I drew one in.

Her lips pursed a little before they brushed against my own. "What are you thinking about?"

Before, it would have been easy to tell her that I had missed her. Now there was nothing other than the truth. "How much of a burden it is to hunt and leave you behind."

For a moment she remained as she was, leaning against my chest as her eyes looked into mine. "Spending time away from you isn't easy for me. Think of it as a job. Realistically, well if our lives were like mom or Charlie, one of us would be working most of the day. The part I think about when I'm missing you is that we don't have to be apart for long, and it isn't very often you have to hunt. Besides that one day I'll be by your side. Maybe think about what it will be like and look forward to that."

If only she knew. "I do think about what it will be like. Now that everything has changed, it's something I long for."

Her lips brushed mine again before her cheek pressed back against my bare chest. "Soon."

"Does me admitting that I long for you to be turned make it difficult for you?"

This time, her chest rose and fell before her answer came. "A little. When it does I remind myself that it will happen when all of us are ready. Also there is Carlie, and she keeps me grounded."

"Both of you keep me grounded." As Bella drifted back to sleep, I drew her closer against my body, content to simply hold her while she slept.

It wasn't too much later when the sounds of our daughter waking, drew me across the hall to her room. In her crib, Carlie was resting on her belly with her arms drawn beneath her chest and her bottom stuck up in the air. Most mornings we found her like this, though how she slept like that, remaining comfortable was a mystery to me. Knowing she was awake, I reached down and rubbed my hand over her back. She stretched her legs out before rolling over onto her back, smiling up at me. "Dadda up"

Once Carlie was in my arms, my angel snuggled against my chest as I sat down in the rocking chair. My little girl rested her cheek against my chest while we rocked together. The sensation of being thirsty came upon me. This thirst wasn't the pain I felt when my throat was dry. It was what I guessed was a normal thirst, only it was blood my little girl wanted.

While I carried her to the kitchen, images appeared in my mind of Carlie resting in our bed next to Bella. The first was of them together, the second with me there as well as our daughter resting between us. Lately we had been letting her snuggle with us in the morning, and that hadn't interfered with putting her to bed. Thankfully she was adjusting well to being in her own room at night.

Once Carlie had her sippy cup, resting in my arms while she drank, I made my way back to the room I shared with her momma.

Bella was awake and smiled as we arrived at the bed. She reached for our baby, settling Carlie at her side as I joined them.

"She let me feel her thirst again."

"It's more intense than when I'm thirsty. You said it's not as intense as your thirst?"

"No. I'm hoping that it won't ever be that way for her, or that if it does get stronger we can find ways to help her." The idea of Carlie feeling pain of any sort was something I dreaded. Contentment washed over me. As I rested on my side, Bella rested on hers, both of us focused on our baby. "Are you going to your dad's today?"

"Yes. Sue has more ideas for the wedding that she wants to go over with me and Leah. Did I tell you that she's starting to show?"

"You did."

"How long until we can find out if I'm pregnant?"

"Another week. Carlisle says that should be enough time." It had been two weeks since our wedding, and both of us were anxious to see if she was with child.

With her cup drained, Carlie sat up looking at her mother. Bella smiled at her. "We better get dressed. She showed me Esme cooking while she sits on the counter watching."

When Bella rubbed her tummy, I sat up. My wife smiled at me. "I felt my stomach rumble. She let me feel her hunger, and I'm also hungry."

"Then we need to hurry and go to the other house."

The second we were inside, Rosalie was there holding her arms out for Carlie. Our little girl laughed, letting her aunt take her to Mimi while Bella held my hand as we followed behind. Since Bella had come to live with us, Esme had learned how to cook well according to what Bella told me, and how much our little girl enjoyed eating what she served.

As my mother cooked, Carlie sat on the counter while Rosalie stood in front of her.

"I think she's going to love cooking when she's old enough to handle that," Bella said as I sat with her at the table. Esme wouldn't let my wife lift a finger while she was here. The only place Bella could cook was at our home or at Charlie's.

"She would love to do that now." We all chuckled as Carlie held onto a plastic spoon, watching as her Mimi flipped a pancake using only the pan.

Once the food was ready, I sat holding my baby as she watched me stab a piece of pancake with her little fork. Once it was secure, I helped her take the handle and guide it into her mouth. Most of the time Carlie only let me help her a few times before shoving my hands away, wanting to use her fingers to do the eating. This time she kept a hold of the handle and managed to spear another bite of pancake. When she got it into her mouth, Bella clapped as did Rosalie and Esme.

After breakfast was over my sister took Carlie into the front room where the rest of the family was, while Bella and I began to clean up.

"I always eat way too much at breakfast, but everything tastes so good. It's kind of nice not to have to do the cooking. Do you think that's a bad thing for me to say?" She asked as she handed me a clean plate to dry.

"No, because Esme loves to do this for you and Carlie. She's very happy that her food tastes so good to you."

As we joined everyone, once the dishes were put away, Bella's cell went off. "Hey Dad."

"Edward, check this out," Emmett called out. He was on his back. A moment later Carlie was on his feet hovering over him.

"She just ate…"

Before I could finish, my baby threw up, the mess landing on her uncle's face. Lightning fast I had her in my arms, holding her away from me as she threw up again and began to cry while Emmett gagged.

"Shhh, I'm sorry baby." Bella was standing where she was with Esme holding her steady. When I walked in front of her she reached for our baby cuddling her against her chest as Carlie continued to cry. "Bella?"

"Sue says Charlie got shot."

Gently I reached for the woman I loved, guiding her to a sofa, while Esme left to get Carlisle.

In her mother's arms, our baby was settling down. "We'll go to the hospital as soon as you're ready."

All she did was nod.

Leaving our distraught daughter behind was hard on Bella just as it was on me. On the way to the hospital, Bella was able to give us what little information Sue had given her which was that her father was in critical condition. The bullet had just missed his heart. Carlisle was driving us as I sat in the back of the car with Bella snug in my arms. In the car behind us, Jasper was following ready to use his powers of influence to get Carlisle into the operating room if he needed to.

"This can't be happening. He was going fishing Edward, just like he always does and that stupid man thought he was a deer, or a bear and he shot him. I hope he gets life for this."

"He's strong, just like you. He'll pull through this."

Before leaving, Alice came to me letting me know that she couldn't see the outcome, but I had to believe that he would pull through this. He had been brave and after a while pretty accepting of my family and of Bella's decision to be with me.

When we got to the hospital, Carlisle dropped us off. He was going to stay in his car along with Jasper in his, until we knew if they would be needed. Inside, as Bella clung to my hand, I guided her to the front desk. She managed to ask the woman there where her father was. Once we had the directions I led the way to the elevators. Inside we were alone and she hugged me. "If he needs to will you turn him."

Her request threw me for a loop, because I had been thinking about him making it through this. "Why don't we see how he is, before we think about that?"

My love nodded, taking in a deep breath before letting it out.

When we arrived at the waiting room, Sue was there along with Billy Black, his son Jacob along with Seth and Leah. A look of surprise passed over their faces before they composed themselves for Bella's sake. She looked at Billy and then to Sue. "How is he?"

"The last we heard they were still trying to get the bullet fragments out. He's fighting," Billy said while Seth hugged his mother. Her thoughts were on the husband she lost when Leah phased for the first time. She wasn't ready to lose someone else she loved, and was rightfully terrified.

As Bella leaned into my arms, I focused on the thoughts around me, until I found the ones I was seeking. The doctor working on Charlie had worked at the hospital a long time, longer than most of the staff in the room with them. He was relieved that they had gotten the fragments out, and concerned because the Chief had lost a lot of blood. He was also thinking about my father, and how his steady hands would help right about now. When it became evident that they were losing more blood than they wanted, I took out my cell, texting Carlisle first then Jasper.

Bella watched me, looking up at me as I pocked the cell. "What is it?"

I reached out putting my hand on her cheek. "He's losing a lot of blood. Carlisle is on his way to lend a hand. The doctor who is operating on him was thinking about how nice it would be to have Carlisle around."

When a tear dripped down her cheek, I leaned in and kissed it away. "He's in good hands now, and he'll be in very good hands in just a few minutes."

Hours later a Doctor Copella came into the waiting room. Those of us who could stand, did, as he came over to Bella. "Your father is going to pull through. It was touch and go for a while, but we finally got the bleeding to stop, well I should say Doctor Cullen did that. Fine man. He's in recover now. I'll have a nurse come for you once we have him stable in his own room."

The tension that had filled the room over the hours of waiting dissipated once the doctor left.

"Thank you." Sue came over to us on Seth's arm. "Thank you for getting your father here and for what he did for Charlie and for me. I'm not strong enough to lose another person that I love."

"You don't need to thank me, or him. Charlie is family to us."

She smiled before going back to where Billy was in his wheelchair.

As I sat back down next to Bella, she had a smile on her face. "Alice texted. She said he's going to be complaining about having to stay in bed next weekend when it's supposed to be warm, a perfect day for fishing. You were right, he is strong."

"And you get that from him"

"I guess I do. I'm so grateful to Carlisle. He saved our baby first, and now Charlie."

Another hour passed before a nurse arrived. Bella and I went with her first, while she explained that we could only stay for a couple of minutes.

Charlie's room was a small center room in the ICU. He looked frail, and the grip on my hand tightened as we got closer to his bed.

"What should I do?"

"Hold his hand to let him know it's you." With her free hand, Bella did that, and her father stirred, but didn't open his eyes. "Dad, I'm here. You have a huge fan club in the waiting room. We were all waiting, praying that you would pull through."

Charlie tried to talk but all that came out was a groan.

"Shh, it's okay Dad. You rest. We have to go now, but Sue is coming next. Carlie fed herself today. She did a really good job with her fork."

His lips twitched a little before the nurse came back.

"Love you Dad." After kissing him, Bella hugged me before we left so Sue could see him.

The second we were out of the ICU, Bella was in my arms crying. "I'm here love."

"I..m glad." My wife took in a few breaths and stopped crying. "He looked so fragile just now. It was scary seeing him like that, because he's always been so strong and tough. Was it like that for you when you all got sick?"

"Yes. I only remember my father before he was taken away. He wasn't pale like Charlie, but he was very frail. I was already feeling poorly, but I do remember how afraid I was. Do you want to wait here?"

"I do, but I think you should go home and get Carlie down for the night.'

In the waiting room, Bella sat next to Billy and Seth. Once I knew she was going to be alright, I headed home, ready to see Carlie, hoping that I could get her to bed quickly and be back with Bella before too long.

My angel was fussing when I got home, though she stopped the second she saw me. Once she was cradled in my arms, drinking her sippy cup, Esme filled me in on her evening. "We have all been reminded what a belly ache feels like, epically your brother. After her nap, she didn't want to eat anything, and has had more sippy cups than she ever has."

"Most likely because she doesn't want her belly to hurt again." Knowing that Emmett had gotten the worst of the feelings Carlie could share made me feel a little better. He hadn't realized what would happen when he let her fly, but after what we had just gone through with Charlie; my thoughts were not all that kind.

A small hand patted my lips and I focused on my baby getting an image of her mother in my mind. "She is with Grandpa Charlie. He has a tummy ache too."

In my old room, I sat down in the rocking chair and began to hum a new lullaby for my daughter. Once she was sound asleep, I laid her down in the crib and made sure the darkening shades were down before leaving her.

Esme met me at the front door with cooler of food for Bella and the others waiting at the hospital. "Give them all my love."

"I will. Thank you."

As I was getting out of my car at the hospital, Carlisle met me. "He's doing fine for now."

I nodded. "Did having Jasper there help?"

"Yes, none of the other doctors or nurses questioned my being there nor noticed anything about my age. I'll let you get to Bella."

"Carlisle, thank you."

My father put a hand on my left shoulder giving it a squeeze. "As you said in the waiting room, Charlie is family."

My wife greeted me when I walked in, hugging me before noticing the cooler of food I had brought with me. "Esme made enough for all of you."

Only Sue and Seth took what food was offered, along with the bottled water. Jake and Leah left with Billy to go to the cafeteria to get their food.

"Please, thank her for us," Sue said.

"I will."

Once Bella finished eating the sandwich she had picked, she asked how our baby was feeling. "I hated leaving her behind."

"She's doing better. Esme said she hasn't wanted any solid food, and they have all been experiencing tummy aches, Emmett especially."

Bella chuckled. "Poor Emmett."

Seth walked over to us and sat next to Bella. "What happened?"

She looked at me. When I nodded, she filled him in on the ability our little girl had. In the end he laughed a little before going back to his mom's side.

Much later after everyone had gone home save for Bella and me, my wife was resting with her head against my shoulder nearly asleep. From some distance away, I heard the footfall of one of the nurses. Her thoughts were happy because Charlie was awake asking to see his daughter. "Bella."

"Hmm?"

"One of the nurses is on the way. Charlie is awake asking for you."

A second later, the nurse came in informing Bella what I heard in her thoughts. "He is asking to see you alone."

Bella stood as I did coming into my arms. "I'm strong enough to do this," she whispered.

"I know. I'll be right here."

She smiled up at me before we kissed. Once she was gone I sat down focusing on the other sounds in the hospital to give them the privacy they needed.

**AN**: _I'm sorry for the long wait in between chapters. It has been a busy few weeks, and the next chapter shouldn't take as long to write and post. Thank you all for sticking with me and for the adds and reviews._


	18. Perspective

**Chapter 18: Perspective**

**Bella**

The walk down the hallway to Charlie's hospital room felt like it took hours instead of only a minute. Once the nurse left, I took a breath before pushing the curtain aside. Charlie's eyes were shut. He still looked so pale and fragile to me. Taking another breath I remembered my husband's words of encouragement and went to Charlie's bed. Gently I reached for his hand. His felt cool to me. As I rubbed my thumb over the top, Charlie slowly opened his eyes.

"Hey dad."

It took time for him to move his head so that he could see me. For a few seconds his eyes shut again, and a lump formed in my throat. It wasn't right to have Charlie laying here so broken. The anger that came to me when Sue told me what happened threatened to erupt. At the moment, being a vampire didn't sound so bad. It would be nice to hunt down the man who shot my father.

"Bells?" Charlie's voice was barely a whisper.

"Don't try to talk."

"Don't … angry."

His eyes shut again as he struggled to stay awake. How did he know that I would be angry? Maybe because that would have been his reaction if something would have happened to me. "I'm feeling that way now."

With great effort, Charlie managed to shake his head. "Not worth…"

"Shhh. You have time to tell me everything you want, dad. Please just rest, and know that we will all be here when you're ready to talk."

The hand in mine gave a gentle squeeze, hanging on as Charlie's eyes shut. It wasn't long before he was asleep again. Only then did the tears spill down my cheeks. The man who had been hunting had done so illegally. As far as I knew, he was being held in the county jail until Charlie could decide what to do. The town of Forks was not taking this lightly. Everyone here loved my father. For the first time since moving here, I saw what a little community could do when one of its own was hurt. No, they didn't come to my aid with Carlie, but that didn't matter. At least they were there for my dad, well the police force at any rate.

When the nurse came in a little later, I headed back to the waiting room, needing Edward's arms around me, needing to tell him my feelings. The room was empty, save for him. His arms were around me a second later, and I drew strength from the love he had for me. "He knew I was angry. He didn't want me to be, but it's hard. Every fiber of my being wants to be turned, just so I can make that man suffer."

If my husband was shocked or worried about what was just said, he didn't respond. Instead, he continued to hold me, which was what was needed the most. "I miss Carlie, but I don't want to leave."

"Rosalie can bring her first thing in the morning."

Time had no meaning until he brought up morning. "What time is it?"

"3:47" After a moment he parted enough to guide me to a sofa, where we sat together.

"Did Sue and Seth leave?"

"Yes, as did Leah and Jacob. I told them you or I would call if anything changes with your father."

"I'm glad that Sue trusts you more." It had been a surprise when she and Seth ate the food Esme sent, as well as a relief. Having their trust would make things easier on Charlie when we visited with Carlie, once the decision was made to move away. Hopefully it would work out for Carlie to see Leah and Jake's baby one day as well, though I wasn't going to hold my breath. My future sister was likely going to ban that idea.

My name being called out brought me out of sleep instantly. Edward's worried gaze was the first thing I saw, causing my heart to speed up. "Charlie?" His arms remained around me as I shot to my feet.

"He's going into surgery now, and Carlisle is there."

Before Edward could say anything else, I pulled out of his arms. "I thought he was stable."

"He was, but his vitals plummeted due to a bleed."

It would be easier just to turn my father, but he would never forgive that. Charlie was in love with Sue, and he would want to live the rest of his life with her before joining her in death. When Edward's hand touched my shoulder, I let him hug me again. He held me against his chest while I tried to remember how to breath. _Please let my father live_. What was it going to be like when he died? How would I handle losing him and living forever? Those thoughts raced through my mind as I clung to my husband, my life line in all of this.

It was torture having to wait. Seth and Sue arrived not long after Edward woke me. None of us said a word as time ticked slowly by. Leah and Jacob showed up a little later along with Billy. The waiting room was large enough to hold a lot of people, but at the moment it felt like we were all squeezed in. When I stood up Edward did too, following me away from the waiting room, down the hallway to the elevators. Knowing that he would hear when we were needed, I punched a button, not caring if it took us up to the next floor or down.

Once we were inside, I shut my eyes. "Pick a number please." There was subtle shifting as the elevator began to move. When it stopped I opened my eyes, walking out into the Maternity Level. Once Edward had my hand, he led the way as I looked down at the wooden floor, counting the lines until we came to a stop. We were in front of the windows looking in at three newborns, all girls.

"They all look so big. The first time I saw our daughter, she was surrounded by wires from heart monitors and everything else. I still need to show you the video we took of her. There was always hope that one day you could come back, and Charlie loved being behind the camera."

"Seeing these little ones gives me hope for our future." His eyes were on me when I looked up to my right.

"I'm anxious for that too, but afraid. I never thought about death before, losing a parent. I know it's going to happen one day, just not today." My eyes welled up again, just as my husband wrapped his strong arms around me. "Carlisle has already found the problem and is working on closing up and securing the area so this won't happen again."

Much later, Carlisle came into the waiting room, letting us know that this time he had checked all of the smaller vessels surrounding the bullet wound, making sure everything was secure before they finished. He also told us he had put Charlie in a medically induced coma, just until he had some time to heal. Once Carlisle had gone, it didn't take too much convincing from Edward or Sue and Billy for me to leave. The ride home was made in silence, my hand holding Edward's as he drove us.

The second Edward stopped the car, the front door opened and Esme walked out with my little girl. Carlie laughed, leaning out from her Mimi, reaching for me. My feet couldn't move fast enough as I ran for them. Once my baby was in my arms, I held on tight kissing her sweet cheeks as she wrapped her little arms around me. Her feelings came in a rush and were of excitement and sheer joy as I stayed were I was, holding her as close as she would let me. "Oh, momma missed you so much."

"Miss momma."

As soon as she said those words, I looked into her beautiful, light green eyes. Her words were so clear. "You missed me?"

"Miss Momma." Once she repeated her words, Carlie leaned her cheek against my shoulder just as a feeling of relief washed over me. If it was mine or hers, I wasn't sure and didn't take time to try and figure it out.

After we reached our house, Carlie was ready to go down for her nap. It felt like I had been away from her for days. Once she was in a dry pair of pants, and had her sippy cup, we snuggled with her in our bed. Carlie rested in my arms while Edward draped his left arm around me, as his right hand held the book he was reading, **Olivia. **Charlie had gotten a lot of the **Olivia Books** for us to read to her. This was the first time Carlie had heard the story of the cute little pig.

"Gain dadda gain." An image of the book came into my mind. Edward chuckled as he turned to the first page. Once he was reading, Carlie relaxed in my arms, yawning a few times as she looked at the pictures of Olivia.

This time when he finished, Edward shut the book and Carlie began to fuss a little as I got out of bed. "Give dadda a kiss."

"No no." My baby rested her cheek against my chest, looking away from her father as he grinned at me.

In Carlie's room, I got her blanket and Bunny before sitting down in the rocking chair. For a little bit I thought she might be going to sleep as I rocked her, but after a while she lifted her head looking at me.

"It's time for you to take a nap."

An image of us just a few minutes ago popped into my mind. Before answering her, I kissed Carlie's nose. "Dadda will read to you after you take your nap. Shhh."

Gently I pressed on the back of her head until she settled it back against my shoulder.

Edward was in our front room reading from a book with leather covering when I joined him. "That looks old."

He nodded. "It is. It's an old law book that once belonged to my grandfather."

After sitting down beside him, Edward reached out pulling me closer. "She didn't want to go to sleep."

"No, but it wasn't a problem. I've missed her, more than I realized. Being in the hospital, waiting for word on Charlie, everything else sort of drifted to the back ground, even my baby. That's never happened before, and I feel like crap."

"What can I do?"

With our baby down for a nap, and a little time alone, there was one thing I did want and would not feel selfish for asking for. "Take me to our room and make me forget everything that has happened in the past twenty four hours. Right now, I just want you Edward."

My husband led me down the hall, closing the door without a sound. As I was about to turn and face him, his hands on my shoulders stopped me. When he pulled me against his chest, and his lips brushed lightly over the left side of my neck, the muscles in my legs trembled. "How do you do that?"

More kisses on my neck. "Do what?" His teeth grazed over the area he had kissed and I felt my center tighten as his arm came around my hips, pulling me tighter against him. Those teeth nibbled the lobe of my ear before his cool breath blew inside. My legs turned to jelly as he supported all of my weight. The bulge against the small of my back coupled with more nibbles on the right side of my neck caused the tightness in my center to move down in between my legs.

When Edward had me undressed, he didn't lay me on the bed as he normally did. Soon I found myself being held against the wall with his hands cupping at the back of my head. His eyes of golden butterscotch, gazed into mine. All I wanted was for our bodies to share in the dance of love. "Please."

He didn't make me wait. Within the next moment he entered me and I became whole as his love washed away the sorrow of the last day.

"Momma up." Carlie's demanding voice caused me to smile as I opened my eyes. She was sitting on the bed next to me while Edward sat behind her.

"Rise and shine."

"Hmm, how long did I sleep?"

"Three hours. That was as long as she was willing to allow you to rest."

"Momma up." Carlie shared an image of Edward in her room, having tea with her as well as some of her stuffed animals. I couldn't help but laugh seeing him holding a small tea cup in his hand with his pinky sticking out as our little girl tried her best to mimic him."

"Some things I still remember from growing up. My mother loved having her lady friends over for tea. One day when I asked, she showed me proper tea time etiquette."

As I sat up, Carlie crawled into my arms. "Did you ever tell your father?"

"Yes, well mother did. He just shook his head and nothing else was ever said. Of course I grew out of that phase fairly quickly, being a young man needing to learn things that men did in those times."

After a little alone time with our baby, and as Carlie ate a banana while I held her on my lap, Edward packed an overnight bag for the big house.

While we walked through the woods, he told me there was no change with Charlie, and that was a relief.

Normally the moment we were inside with everyone else, Carlie was always ready to visit with the other members of our family. This time she held on to me, whimpering when Rosalie rubbed her hand over my baby's back. Knowing Carlie would likely be calmer if it was just Edward and I with her, we took her up to her playroom. As I sat on the daybed rocking her, my angel kept her arms around me.

"Do you want to stay here tonight?" Edward sat down next to me while I continued to cuddle our baby close.

"I wish I had a way of being in two places at once. Part of me just wants to take her with us, but I know we can't. It's already enough that Carlisle has been there twice."

When Edward left, Carlie lifted her head and an image of him flashed into my mind. "I don't know where he's going. Why don't we play?"

"Momma have." Carlie leaned against me, putting her arms back around my neck.

"You have me baby, you have me, and I'm staying right here."

Edward returned not even a minute later. As he sat down, Carlie wanted him and hung on to him the way she had with me. "I checked with Alice, but she didn't see anything with the wolves around. We can take her if you want."

It was so tempting. "No, she needs to stay here."

"No no no." Our little girl clung to her father even more. Instead of continuing our conversation, Edward carried her over to her stove and turned the switch, causing it to play music and light up. While the music played, I got off the bed and began to dance. It wasn't long before Carlie joined me, and for a little while it was all about being with her.

Being in Carlie's old room at the big house in the bed we used to share, was strange. At one time this room felt like my own. Now it was Carlie's. As I lay on my side, rubbing circles over my daughter's back, I was glad she was finally falling asleep. We were going to the hospital in the morning. If she fussed, she would come with us. Alice had not seen any issues with us taking Carlie, if that was necessary. My hope was that if my baby got the rest she needed with me here, she wouldn't mind us leaving.

Carlie was learning so much, talking a little more each day. She was also understanding more and more of what we said, or maybe she was just paying more attention since I had been leaving her for longer periods of time. When she rolled away from me, clinging to her blanket and Bunny, I slid off the bed, leaving the room without making any noise.

Downstairs, Edward was sitting on a sofa alone while on another sofa, Emmett and Jasper were playing video games on a game system.

"Emmett, you're going to break another one if you don't watch it," Rosalie called out from the dining room where she and Alice were sitting. He was moving the stick on the game controller so fast, I couldn't really see it.

The TV screen was split into two parts, a bottom half, and top half. The view was of a bombed out field moving past.

"What are they playing?"

"**Call of Duty**," Edward answered before pulling me down on his lap.

There were other men on the screen with bubbles over their head. Some of them didn't get shot, but a lot of them were going down. Occasionally a substance splashed on the screen like blood. "Is that blood?"

"Yes."

I'd never been into playing video games, but as they kept on, I found myself staring at the screen, trying to figure out how they knew what players to kill and which ones not. A stream of swear words filled the room as Emmett's screen was covered in red. Jasper chuckled as he stood up after letting the remote drop to the floor. He stocked off still muttering curse words as he went.

"Is he always like that?"

"Mm, he takes his gaming very seriously."

Jasper finished playing a little later. As soon as he headed for the stairs, Alice was on his back kissing his neck, leaving not doubts to what they were up too. That brought to mind what happened with Edward and me earlier in the day.

"Do you want to learn how to play?" Edward asked, kissing the side of my neck.

"I'm not going to be any good at it."

Soon enough I found a game controller in my hand. Edward pulled me back on his lap, showing me what each button did, though it was all overwhelming. Luckily he kept his hands on the controller as well. Soon I found myself running through a battle field as he pointed out how to tell the good guys from the bad. I lasted three minutes before my life came to an end. Very quickly I was on the field again, this time with Edward's hands in control.

As he got into his game, I glanced around before moving my left and between my legs to his thigh. My husband kept focused on the game and I focused on where I wanted my hand to go. When it reached the target, the remote dropped and my world moved in a blur of motion.

In the third floor bathroom, Edward had both of us undressed before I could blink. My hands pushed against his chest and he backed up against one of the tile walls as I rubbed over his chest before kissing my way down his belly. He growled softly as I explored, moving down past his manhood, kissing down his legs, before bringing my tongue into play. Slowly I licked my way back up his leg in between his thighs, feeling my body responding to the soft constant growls filling the bathroom. As I was about to reach my target, Edward lifted me into his arms our lips crashing together as he pushed my back against the cool tiles. The last thoughts I had before he entered me were of how much joy there was in this sort of union.

Having Carlie in the hospital waiting room with us, lightened the mood. We tried sneaking out twice. Each time, she quickly figured out what was going on before projecting her anger and sorrow on everyone, until we brought her here. At some point we were going to have to find a way to teach her to control what she did, but with Charlie hurt along with my emotions going everywhere, this was not the time to try and do anything of the sort.

I had been in with Charlie a few times, and my baby hadn't fussed when I left, happy to be with her daddy and me. As I sat next to my father's bed holding his hand, I talked about all she was learning. "She told me she missed me when I got back yesterday. She is also telling us 'no' a lot more, getting ready to be a two year old. Carlisle is going to wake you up tomorrow, and hopefully you will be ready to get out of here soon."

They would move him to the Cardiac Care Unit after this, since the wound was so close to his heart. When the nurse brought Sue, I took my leave. Seth was the only other one in the waiting room aside from Edward and another couple. My baby was on the quilt we had spread over the floor, watching Seth make a tower out of her building blocks. Edward sat in a chair close by smiling at me as I sat next to him. "Charlie is so still."

My husband wrapped his arm around me, and I found comfort in his touch just as I always did. "Carlisle should be able to wake him tomorrow; he whispered as Carlie reached out and took one of the blocks. She stood up and put it on one of the others without a hitch, clapping her hands until we joined her.

"What if she projects?"

"I'm keeping a close watch on her, but if anyone else comes in." He didn't have to finish that, and it was wise for him not too given how much Carlie was starting to pick up on with our conversations.

"Woe, um she's hungry I think," Seth informed as he blinked.

Calmly I got up, lifting Carlie into my arms as Edward gathered up our things. "Will you let your mom know we will be back later, and that we will do the evening turn this time?"

"Sure thing. She's smart."

It was a relief to be in the car, and evident that Carlie would not be coming back to the hospital. We were lucky she had only projected to Seth. Now that she could ride in her seat, forward facing, Carlie was much happier and didn't mind sitting in the back on her own. "How do we help her control her power?"

"Until she can understand what we mean by telling her not too, there isn't a whole lot we can do."

"I don't want her to be isolated."

"Nor do I." What Carlie could do brought about thoughts of what another child born to us would be able to do. Moving away someplace where people didn't know us, and to a place where Carlie could stretch her legs, sounded more and more appealing.

At our house, we had lunch before story time and a nap. Edward and I put her in her crib, leaving her room without our baby fussing.

"You know, I'm still a little hungry."

Edward held my hand, giving it a little squeeze as he led the way to the kitchen. "What would you like?"

"I'll fix something. Will you build a fire for us?"

After kissing me, my husband left. Once I had cut up some fruit and sliced off some cheese, I joined Edward in our family room. He had spread out a blanket and set down pillows in front of the fire that was now burning in the fire place. When I was comfortable, he took my plate and selected one of the strawberries, holding it out for me.

Taking the whole berry into my mouth, I drew it in as well as the tips of his fingers, before he eased away as I chewed up my food. The next piece of fruit was a grape. As I sucked on more than just the grape, Edward watched me with hunger in his eyes. Before he could offer me another piece of fruit I got up on my knees and brought my lips to his. Our tongues battled for dominance. In the end he let me win as I darted mine in and out of his mouth. Seconds later he was on his back with me straddling his chest. Edward's eyes still held that hunger in them. Not wanting to wait, I leaned in, kissing his lips, molding mine to his as my hair fanned out around his head.

Edward's hands reached up, pushing at my sweatshirt. His palms pushed up my chest until he was cupping both of my breasts while my lips continued attacking his. When his parted my tongue darted in pushing against the roof of his mouth as I slid lower down his chest. My whole body felt like it was on fire as he got my bra undone. Only because I had to have oxygen did my kisses come to an end. As I leaned back, he lifted his head, pushing my sweatshirt upward. Once it was off along with my bra, his lips were on me sucking and nibbling until all that came out of me were pants along with want for more, which my husband was more than eager to give.

When Charlie opened his eyes for the first time in two days, Sue and I were on either side of him. He coughed a little and winced as Carlisle stood at the end of the bed, and the nurse who had given him whatever medication to wake him, left.

Carlisle came to my side of the bed as my dad became more alert, taking his vitals.

After he left, Sue took one hand and I took the other.

"Beer."

Both of us laughed, before Sue took care of that. "Not until you are on your feet."

My father frowned as his eyes fluttered close.

After that first day, it was only three days later when he got moved to the Cardiac Care Unit. By that time he was fully alert, ready to go home. He also wanted to see Carlie.

"Bells, trust me on this. You can teach her what 'no' means."

It was like old times, though this time having my dad argue with me was a relief. "Telling her not to, is like telling a kid not to walk. This is a part of her, and we are working on it, but we can't just force her to stop all at once."

Before he could say anything else on that matter, Sue arrived with Seth behind her, pushing Billy's wheelchair. Once they had Charlie's attention, I took my leave, ready to go home to my angel.

The walk from the garage to our house was a cool one. It wasn't raining or snowing, but it was definitely colder than it had been the last couple of days. Fall was really starting to kick in. The trees above me already had colorful leaves hanging from them. It was hard to believe that in another month it would be October. The only reason I was aware of that, was due to Alice's idea of dressing Carlie up for trick or treat, which wasn't going to happen unless my baby started to realize that not everyone would understand her projections, both visual and feeling.

Seth had mentioned a bonfire at the beach on the thirty first. telling me I could bring Carlie to that. Still, there was that risk, and as I thought about it, and of Charlie and how close we had come to losing him, it felt like my head was filling to fast with decisions we had to make soon. I wanted to gain some sort of perspective on how our life was going to turn out, but only time was going to tell.

"Momma up momma up."

Ahead of me, Carlie was running faster than I had seen her, and more confident than she had ever been. Just as I got to my knees, my little bundle of energy was in my arms, and nothing else mattered. We did have to make some decisions but not right away. Edward joined us, helping me to my feet as Carlie pressed little wet kisses to my face. "Miss oo momma."

"I missed you too." When I kissed her cheeks, she laughed leaning back in my arms which gave me access to her neck. Only when she needed to breath, did I stop nibbling her neck. Once she had her breath, Carlie was on her feet running full speed ahead of us, while her father and I chased after her.

_**AN: Thank you everyone for the reviews and for reading the story thus far. So there was a little more romance in this chapter, and I figure them being newly married that is going to be a part of things. I tried to balance it out through the chapter as I will with the story. Much more to go. Thanks for sticking around and please please keep reviewing. You guys are great at that.** _


	19. Settling In

**Chapter 19: Settling In  
**

**Edward**

Images of Bella feeding Carlie flowed into my mind while I finished slicing a peeled apple. Along with the images, a feeling of sadness washed over me, which was easily pushed into the back of my mind. Carlie didn't need words to let me know how she felt about waking from her nap to find her momma gone. It pained me to know that she was hurting for Bella, but her momma needed to be with Charlie, and the hospital wasn't a place our daughter could go with her growing abilities. Once her food was in front of her, Carlie put her hands over her face.

"Momma will be home soon, baby. I know you're hungry. Why don't I hold you while you eat?"

When she reached for me, I lifted her from the highchair, settling her on my lap. Once in my arms, my angel picked up a piece of apple, popping it in her mouth. After eating most of the apple and some of the turkey left over from dinner last night, Carlie pushed away the plate. My little girl stayed against my left hip as I cleaned up, only getting down once we were in her room.

Carlie walked to her crib, using the small step stool to get up onto the mattress. Yesterday the outer rail had been removed, converting the crib into a toddler bed since Carlie was able to climb out. So far she liked the change and stayed in her bed during nap and bedtime.

Once Bunny was in her grasp, she ran over to me putting her friend on my lap before going over to her little stove. At our family's house, Carlie loved watching her Mimi as she cooked. Her little oven was her favorite toy due to her interest in making food. Once she had finished cooking, my little girl brought over a purple plate with a plastic fish on it.

An image of me feeding Bunny came into my mind. When I complied, she rewarded me with a smile. After meal time was over for Bunny, my angel got a book down from the shelf within her reach, taking it over to the rocking chair. Determined to do things on her own, Carlie put the book on the chair before grabbing on the arm rests attempting to pull up on the seat. When that didn't work, she got her stool and clapped her hands once she was sitting there all on her own.

"You are a big girl."

She smiled, reaching one hand out as she opened and closed it. After we were both seated in the chair, and the book was open on her lap, I began to read the story of **Curious George**.

Carlie's small hand patted the picture of the monkey.

"That is George."

Her head tilted back so that she could see me.

"Is he a monkey?"

"Key key."

"He is very curious of the yellow hat." As I patted the picture her attention was drawn back to the book. While we read the story, Carlie would pat a picture attempting to say the words. When we finished she turned the book to the first page, and we went through the story again.

* * *

Watching my wife and daughter cuddling in our bed, was something that never tired me. The moment her mother arrived in the house, Carlie was in her arms. According to Bella, Carlie was showing all the things that happened while I was alone with her. As they snuggled together, our baby had **Curious George** open again, showing her momma the 'key key' along with the 'hat'

"It sounds like you and dadda had a good time."

At the mention of my name, Carlie glanced at me before snuggling against her momma's chest. Jealous feelings filled my mind, stopping once I was in the kitchen. After getting out leftovers from last night, I prepared two plates for my girls, microwaving both meals.

Just as everything was set on the table, Bella came in with Carlie cradled in her arms. "Hmm, Dadda fixed a good dinner for us." My wife sat down letting Carlie remain on her lap.

"How is…"

"No no dadda."

Bella looked down at our daughter, before turning her so they could look at one another. "Carlie, Dadda can talk to me too."

"Momma have."

"You have momma. Now, we need to eat, and you need to be nice to your dadda."

There was an audible huff as Bella turned her back around. This time she remained quiet while I asked about Charlie.

"He's really tired of being in the hospital, but your father is correct. He needs to stay there until we are sure everything is mended. Charlie will do everything he can not to rest when he gets home. He also misses seeing Carlie."

"That's understandable. I miss both of you when I'm away, hunting. Speaking of that, Carlisle has been talking about switching her to animal blood."

My wife finished chewing the bite of food in her mouth. "I wonder how that will go."

"Not too bad. We'll start her on Mountain Lion. It's the closest to what she's taking now." As we talked, Carlie focused on eating both from her plate and her mothers.

After dinner while Bella and Carlie took a bath, I made quick work out of cleaning the kitchen. Just as that was finished, Carlisle's thoughts entered my mind as he approached the house. He was going over the different parts of the heart, meaning he was keeping something from me.

Before he knocked, I told him to come in. The features on his face were calm. I knew if it was Charlie he would already have let me know, so I could prepare Bella.

"They are finishing in the bathroom." He nodded as we sat down. While we waited, Carlisle let me know how Chief Swan was doing from a medical view. "He's healing remarkably well, all things considered."

"All things considered? He had you. I would think that should count for most of it."

Carlisle chuckled. "He is determined, that has a lot more to do with it than what I did in surgery. He's lucky to still be with us."

A few minutes later, Carlie ran in, laughing when Carlisle caught her in his arms and lifted her in the air. "Gain Poppy gain." Her Poppy complied as her laughter filled the room.

"Key key." Once she was on her feet, Carlie ran back the way she came, leaving us alone with my father.

"Bella, I ran the test, and nothing yet."

My wife leaned into my arms as Carlisle offered an explanation. "Many times stress can be a factor in women not conceiving, even with the percentages in your favor."

"Or, I may be in that ten percent, and just lucked out with Carlie."

He nodded. "I'm sorry I don't have better news."

Before Carlisle could continue, my angel returned with** Curious George**. Once she was settled on his lap, she showed him pictures telling him about George and the hat, leaving Bella and I a chance to talk.

"Did you think you were?"

Her head nodded. "I wanted it to be a surprise, and I told Carlisle to let both of us know if I wasn't. Honestly, with Carlie's abilities, maybe it's better that we just have one child."

After our little girl was down for the evening, and once a fire was crackling in the fire place, Bella and I settled down on the blankets spread on the floor. My wife settled next to me, both of us on our sides. "We could increase our efforts to conceive," I whispered, reaching out to run my fingers through her silky waves of hair.

When her eyes filled with tears, I pulled her against my chest. "Don't cry."

My wife sniffed. "Can't help it. The thought of not being able to experience another pregnancy with you here just hurts so much." More tears wet my chest.

"Are those videos of Carlie around?"

I felt her head nod before Bella moved away from me. Both of us sat up. When she came back she handed me the small video recorder. Getting it set up was a breeze and when she was ready, I pressed the play button.

Charlie's voice came on before any picture. "Bells, something's not, oh wait it might help if I removed the cap off the lens. Alright. World meet my new granddaughter, Carlie Elisabeth Swan." The camera zoomed in to the incubator. Inside was our daughter, so tiny and so helpless. Bella leaned against me as we watched the video from Carlie's first few days, all the way until she got to come home to Forks.

When it ended, all I could do was hold my wife close. "I am so sorry for not being here."

"Don't be, remember, no guilt about what happened, only the future, and this isn't supposed to make you feel guilty."

Even though it wasn't, the feelings were still there, but pushed to the back of my mind. Bella was right. We were together now and had a bright future ahead of us.

* * *

Jasper had taken an interest in Carlie's abilities, because some of what she did was similar to his powers. While Rosalie sat at the piano playing for her niece, Bella and I sat with him and Alice as he explained an idea. "I've been thinking that maybe if I could project emotions to her, and she can focus on just me, maybe there is a way to teach her to control it, or to help her understand that not everyone needs to feel what she does."

It was Bella who spoke first. "I don't know, she's already so sensitive to everything. It may scare her." When she looked to me, I let them know my thoughts.

"I think if Jasper lets her feel happiness, and she realizes there is someone else who can do the things she can, it may be of some help. If she can learn control early enough she won't be isolated."

With both of us on-board, Rosalie brought Carlie over to Jasper. Everyone else left the room except for the four of us. Carlie laughed, and as she stopped, she put both of her hands on Jasper's cheeks. My brother left his thoughts open so I could explain to Bella what he was feeling, and in turn what he was sharing with our baby. "He says she just let him feel happiness" Carlie laughed again making it unnecessary for me to explain her feelings.

When she patted his cheeks several times, both of us felt Carlie's frustration. "He's withholding his feelings now."

"It's okay not to show your feelings just like I am. Do you want to laugh?" Jasper asked.

"Yes" Carlie's voice was clear, before she began to laugh again.

"There, that's good honey. That feeling is tired."

"No naps."

Jasper chuckled as he hugged her close. When Carlie was ready, Bella took her upstairs to put her down for a nap, leaving me the chance to talk with my brother. "Did you feel anything else with her?"

"The biggest emotion was relief. She knows now that I understand her way of communication better than anyone else. She was also feeling frustrated towards the end, and tired as I said."

There was a strong desire to know what Carlie was feeling beyond what she shared. "I'm wondering if she has what every Bella does to block out my ability of hearing her thoughts. Unless she shares, there is nothing from her."

Jasper chuckled again. "Frustrating?"

"Very much so. I'm just grateful that you can help her. Bella and I have both been worried about having to keep her isolated. If she can learn how to control these gifts, maybe that won't be necessary."

* * *

Even though it was cold outside, Bella wanted to go on a walk. Once she was bundled up, we left Carlie asleep with the rest of the family, and headed up the driveway. "Do you think Jasper will mind continuing to show her how to use her gifts?"

"He said he is happy to keep trying."

My wife glanced up at me, smiling. "How do you feel about that?"

"A little jealous, only because it would be nice to have a way to show her on my own. I'm more grateful than anything else. Hopefully this will give her some confidence. What we can do is try and continue to encourage her to use words, along with what she shows us, and when she projects her feelings, like Jasper did."

For a little while there were no words needing to be spoken. Bella held my hand as we both enjoyed our walk together.

"Mom sent me an email the other day about getting some teaching material for Carlie. She thinks it may help her be more confident in verbal communication. I think it's too early to start anything like that."

"Anything we can teach her now, will go a long way as she grows. Did she say what specifically she wants to send our way?"

Bella told me about the early childhood education books, and the catalog that had workbooks for us to use when that time came. In the end, she agreed to reply to the message and accept Renee's offer to send what she wanted.

* * *

Charlie's release from the hospital was a relief to us all. Two days later, after Carlie woke up from her nap, Bella and I drove over to his house so they could have a visit.

"Groppa, groppa hold." Carlie had gotten away from Bella, and laughed as Sue helped Charlie settled her on his lap. The color was back in his cheeks, and he smiled as Sue helped get Carlie's coat off.

"My goodness, you have grown so much." Charlie was still for a moment. "Is that right?" He looked over at us as we sat down on the sofa. "She showed me Jasper holding her and I felt happy."

"Jasper can cause people to feel emotion much the way Carlie does. He's been showing her how to control it. Also when she lets him feel something, he gives her the word for the emotion. We all try and do that now."

"Good, I want to see her out and about when she's ready."

After Carlie was done letting her Groppa hold her, she ran over to her rocking horse and got on without any help.

"How does it feel to be home, Dad?"

Charlie leaned back in his chair, pulling on Sue until she was sitting on the right side of his lap. "So much better. I got a shower in my own place. I've shaved, and slept in my own bed. Sue's been keeping me well fed too."

"His appetite is back with a vengeance."

We all laughed drawing Carlie back to us. When she saw Sue on his lap, I quickly went to her. "Remember what Uncle Jasper showed you?"

My little girl huffed, looking up at me. "Would you like to sit on groppa's lap?"

"Groppa hold."

After Sue got up, I lifted Carlie up and a moment later she was snuggled in Charlie's arms.

"Did she project anything to you," Bella asked as Sue sat next to her.

"Not that I'm aware of. If she did it was likely blocked out by my relief and joy at having your father home. We want to go on and move up the wedding date. Now that he's home, and after almost losing him, waiting seems useless to both of us."

"When?" My wife asked while Carlie played patty cake with Charlie.

"Next weekend, on the beach. It's going to be a sunny day. Jake, Quil, and Embry are already working on setting up a nice covered area with some portable heaters. We don't plan to have very many people around, though afterward we will have a larger gathering at my house."

We stayed a little longer, until it was evident that Charlie was getting tired. Before pulling out of his neighborhood, Carlie fell asleep, leaving time for Bella to fill me in on what Sue had talked about with the wedding.

"I'm glad they are doing this now. There's no point in holding off. Dad loves her, and is happier than I've ever seen him. It's very clear that she feels the same way. I'm happy that Jake is helping out."

"Did his news come as a surprise to you?"

My wife reached out and took my free hand, holding on as she began to talk. "In a way, yes. The police force has been his family for so long now. At the same time he did miss a lot when I was a baby, well when mom was with him. She said he buried himself at work after his parents died. He wasn't coping well with their marriage, or maybe their death, mom didn't know which was harder for him. She also needed more attention than he was willing to give her. Anyway, now he has Sue and I think he'll be happy being retired, along with living there. He and Billy will have more time to fish now, if Sue will let that happen."

I glanced over at her. "What do you mean?"

"She likes fishing as well, and she has some ideas on places they can go when they want to get away from it all."

Knowing that my wife was happy with this made me happy. All of us needed some joy and a little time to settle down.

* * *

Two days after Bella emailed Renee, her package arrived. Jasper brought it to our cabin and as he and Carlie went to her room to work on her gifts, Bella got a pair of scissors. My wife pulled out three teachers guides handing them to me before reaching back into the box. The next thing she pulled out was a pair of small headphones along with a package of CD's.

Once everything was spread out on the floor in front of us, she sat down on my crossed legs. "I guess these are for the computer?"

"They are games for her to play, though I think we can use those when she's older." Like Bella, the idea of our daughter spending time in front of a computer or a TV screen was not something I felt she needed at this time in her life. The rest of the books were guides on early education. There were basic lesson plans about how to teach Carlie to write her ABCs and her numbers. One book was an actual work book which had numbers and letters printed in color for us to go over with her. "I think this one will be good to use now. The rest needs to come when she has better control at holding on to objects like her spoon and fork."

"I agree. I'm not sure she's going to hold still enough for us to go over any of these."

"She might if we do this before bed, depending on how tired she is."

The next book Bella picked up was a catalog. We spent the time before Carlie came running in, circling the things we wanted to order now, and putting checks by the things we would order later.

When Carlie sat down on Bella's lap, I wrapped my arm around both of them as Jasper joined us, sitting down on our tan ottoman. "How did she do?" Bella asked.

"Much better. I worked on getting her to tell me what she wanted instead of showing me with her mind. She didn't like that idea, so I went over to her tea table and picked up her tea cup as an example. After I did that she took me to the things she wanted to have, and we went over names of everything she took me too."

Not interested in hearing her uncle"s report, Carlie got up and ran over to her toy chest, pulling out her rings before dumping them off the stand to the floor.

"Did she name anything?"

"Tea cup," Jasper informed.

From her spot, Carlie looked over at us. "Tea cup. Have tea cub." We chuckled as she went toward her room and returned with one of her tea cups, giving it to jasper before she left and came back with another one.

She sat down in front of him and he took a pretend drink. Carlie did the same before giggling, and crawling into his lap.

"So, what was in the package?"

"Dadda have."

Bella got up and while she told Jasper about the education supplies, Carlie led the way to her room.

"Dadda, tea cup."

When I took one, she smiled at me before going over to her bed. Once she had her blanket and Bunny, my little girl came to me, cuddling in my arms as I walked over to the rocking chair. I felt tired, and as we rocked together, Carlie didn't try and get away.

"Dadda hmm."

The tune I hummed was a new song I had been working out in my mind. Carlie tried to mimic what I was doing for a minute before lifting her head, looking up at me. She yawned showing me an image of her in bed between Bella and myself.

In our front room, Jasper was getting ready to leave, though not before our daughter reached out for him giving him a one armed hug while hanging on to me.

"She wants us to snuggle with her." I told Bella, once Jasper was gone.

Bella smiled at me. "I think that sounds like a nice idea. Why don't we snuggle by the fire."

While Bella spread out the blankets along with a few pillows, our baby watched from my arms. When the pallet was ready, I laid her down, taking the diaper my wife handed me. Getting her changed was easy now that she didn't struggle. Once we were all settled together, Carlie rolled over on her tummy holding on to her two buddies as Bella and I settled on our sides. It didn't take her long to go to sleep, and Bella and I were content to simply rest beside our baby, watching over her.

"This is what you do when I sleep?"

"Sometimes I close my eyes and listen to you and Carlie breathe. It's the most comforting sound to me, along with the beating of your hearts."

It wasn't long before my love joined our daughter in sleep, leaving me to keep them safe. That was a job I would never grow tired of, not even when my wife joined me in immortality.

_**AN: Thank you all for the reviews and adds to Fav's. So another chapter for you. Hopefully more answers to some of the questions on pregnancy. Happy reading, and thank you again for taking the time to read and review.**_


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